Blessing Heart

First, that grace is everywhere. In the Shaivite tradition, grace is considered to be an intrinsic property of consciousness itself, a fundamental activity of the divine energy that pervades every atom of the universe. Grace, in other words, is always there. Our practice merely aligns us with it, allowing us to draw the grace-particles (as I often imagine them) out of the vibratory soup around us.

Second, that the power in our blessings is linked to our emotional connection and our centering. Blessing is essentially heart-energy directed positively and intentionally toward others. The most effective blessing is not only sincere and deeply felt, it also comes from a conscious connection with your source, the underlying power of your being. And for most of us, the best way to make this connection is by centering ourselves in the heart.

Heart Connection
It's the heart connection that explains why some positive wishes connect, while others feel powerless. A positive wish that comes simply from the mental level can be well-intentioned, but like any thought without the energy of feeling behind it, it often doesn't seem to carry much power. But when a blessing arises from the heart, or is offered after consciously connecting to the heart, it carries the heart-field's strong magnetic resonance.

On a physical level, the heart gives out a powerful electromagnetic field, not only harmonizing and aligning the other organs in our bodies, but also harmonizing our energy with the energies around us. The heart's magnetic field, far bigger and more powerful than the brain's, actually extends many feet from the body, which is one reason why another person's emotions and feelings can so powerfully affect us. Heart cells can also bond with other heart cells. Normally a heart cell taken from its mother-heart begins to fibrillate and die. When another heart cell—not even from the same heart—is placed near it, the dying cell comes back to life. And once that bond between the two cells is established, they go on supporting one another over distance.

From the perspective of the yoga-tantra, the subtle heart center is the seat of the intuitive level of thought, known as pasyanti, where impulses and intentions arise directly from the deepest inner source, and carry the power of that source. All of this boils down to a simple fact: when we center ourselves in the heart and offer good wishes from that center, people tend to feel it. If we have a particularly strong heart energy, they feel it strongly enough to know that they've received something. This, I believe, is the secret behind the experiences that people have in the presence of charismatic gurus like Ammachi. Her highly developed heart-energy, combined with an intention to bless, kindles feelings of tenderness and love in people who come in contact with her. It's a power we can all cultivate, by cultivating the heart. The more we are aware of the inherent power of the inner heart, the more our wishes have power.

Giving Blessing
There are different ways to give blessings, of course. Sometimes just remembering someone lovingly is a way of sending blessings. A concrete prayer, or even a physical object can 'hold' the blessing. When a friend of mine lost her son, the members of her yoga community each sent her a bead that represented their wish for her well-being. The point is that the more specific, directed, and heart-connected the blessing, the greater its effect and the greater its power to liberate our own hearts from knots of negativity or grief.

This liberating quality of blessing makes it an especially powerful way to work with painful relationships, and with our own personal struggles and feelings of loss. I've learned that whenever I find myself struggling with someone, if I want to resolve the conflict, I have to bless them. Giving a blessing doesn't mean that I knuckle under to them. But it always helps me to the recognition that this other person is a reflection of myself, and that my own well-being can never be separated from the well-being of others in my life.

We all have people in our lives whom we've subtly refused to bless. Yes, they are often people who have wounded us, and we may need to do some other kinds of inner work before we can honestly extend blessings to them. Yet just as often, if we're honest, we see that our refusal to bless comes simply from an inner contraction, from irritation, jealousy, or some other form of withholding. I find it helpful to do a periodic scan of all my relationships, past and present, to notice where I withhold blessings, and then to make an effort to offer them. Sometimes, the scan reveals that I'm holding negative feelings that I need to clear. Yet, even when I'm ambivalent to begin with, the act of consciously extending a blessing always shifts something within me, and within the relationship itself. Each intentional act of blessing strengthens our ability to offer our best, until eventually we find that the inclination to bless has become a deep tendency within us, just through practice.