Question #8: What if the ancestors that come when you call aren't really ancestors? Instead they seem to be ancestors of type—the connection is through a tradition of behavior and chosen affiliation rather than strictly by biology. Do blood relations or chosen relations "count" more as ancestors?"
It's not all that unusual to have unrelated "ancestors" become part of your ancestral house. Some indigenous traditions actually have specific names for the various types of ancestors: blood vs. affinity. Besides, friends, teachers, and mentors who have died can and should also be honored as respected ancestors. I don't think that one is more important than the other. If we go far enough back, we all share common ancestry and I think it's good and proper to honor them all, regardless of whether the association is one of blood, adoption, or affinity. Usually one or two of your ancestors will step forward to maintain and organize your ancestral house. They can be depended upon to keep things in order and can be petitioned for advice or aid if you're confused about what to do.
There are also heroic ancestors, those who were keepers of their line, or who did heroic deeds in life, or who, for some other reason, are above the norm, even cultural heroes (like Cu Chulain amongst the Celts, or Herkules to the Hellenics) who might call for offerings and inclusion. For those of us who are priests, diviners, healers, shamans, mystics, warriors , craftsman, etc. it's also important to honor your lineage ancestors. If you practice a craft, for instance, you are the most recent in a long, long line of men and women who strove for excellence in that same craft. They can help you. They're what I call 'lineage' ancestors. As a shaman, for instance, I am part of a lineage stretching back into pre-history. It's like having been adopted into a really large family. They should be honored too. If you feel particularly strange about it, you can always give them their own special space on your ancestor altar.
It's part of ancestor work: sometimes you'll acquire ancestors. When I first visited a local cemetery, I had a couple dead folks want to come home with me. The first time I went to a Civil War cemetery, one of the soldiers and I developed a certain affinity and now he is honored with the rest of my dead. I have a colleague who made a grave rubbing of a Colonial Era grave and the lady whose grave it was followed him home. Now he has to hail her as an ancestress. Sometimes your own ancestors might bring other spirits in. I once encountered a lonely spirit hovering wistfully outside my house after a major ancestor rite. I took offerings out to him and said that if my own dead agreed, he could come and partake of the ancestral offerings that I lay out. That's just the way it works. Dedicated ancestor workers tend to encounter this an awful lot.
Question 9: How about what do you do when your ancestors don't want you to honor them, or otherwise do not respond or show interest in your devotion?
In twenty years, I've encountered this three times. Each time, there was a very good reason for it. Before I gave up on honoring them though, I would try to seek out a good diviner or ancestor worker to see if I could find out why. It may be that something needs to happen or be done first and if that's the case such guidance can be invaluable toward righting one's ancestral house. There may be legitimate reasons though for the lack of contact and a diviner or ancestor worker can help you get to the bottom of the matter so at least you know what's really going on and can act accordingly.
Question 10: What is an ancestor? Can you define the term exactly?
I use ancestor as something of a catch-all term. It certainly applies first and foremost to those connected to us in some way by blood and/or adoption. It also, however, may be applied to those connected to us by lineage (see question 8), or affinity. The elemental Powers are our ancestors: fire, water, the mountains, ice, wind, trees, stones...they have their own medicine that they can share with us if they wish and predated us by millennia. The Gods may be considered ancestors in some traditions....it's a very nebulous term if you get right down to it. I usually think of it as "dead people and those from whom they descend" with the unspoken understanding that it is those who have a place in my spiritual house.
If anyone has any other questions or would like more elaboration on one of the questions above, please don't hesitate to contact me privately at krasskova at gmail dot com. I'll be happy to do my best to sort your problems and confusions around ancestor honoring out.
Finally, a big thank you to everyone who sent me their questions, and to Laura Patsouris, who was kind enough to read this through to make sure I didn't miss anything. Any errors here are well and truly my own.
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