Sometimes you fight. Sometimes you pray for peace.

It's been a rough week for many of us survivors of rape.Some of the responses to Joe Paterno's death (the one's that blantently stated that we should forget his role in enabling the rape of young boys in light of his awesome football legacy) had been fighting back panic attacks, tears, hate, and rage as I tried so hard not to let anger suck away all the joy and healing that I've managed to find over the past few years. Walking the line between a desire to love/forgive and a desire to live in a … [Read more...]

Rape culture, Relevant Magazine, and other things that make me want to swear a lot

Trigger warnings: rape, and rape enablingSome of the responses to Joe Paterno's death were triggering for me. You know, the ones that basically say (albeit in much more eloquent terms), "Everyone, shut up about the rape victims and how they're feeling! Joe Paterno was really good at winning football games! Can't we just talk about that?"As a rape victim, this was painful to hear, but not unexpected. As soon as I heard of his death (or rather, as soon as the media falsely reported his death … [Read more...]

Mark Driscoll, spiritual abuse, and fluffy bunnies…

We're going to talk about Mark Driscoll today on the blog.I know that, for many, the mere mention of that name brings up feelings of anger and overall  yucky-ness. So, I'm going to help you get through it. Inspired by the "Bunnies to Replace Mark Driscoll" movement, every time your brain imagines this...:...I want you to mentally replace that image with this:Got it? Okay, now for the post!If I wrote a response about everything awful or stupid Pastor Mark Driscoll (hereafter known as … [Read more...]

When I went to an Episcopal Church

Abe and I didn't know much about the Episcopal Church when we went there yesterday morning, which led to some awkwardness--like having to fumble with that prayer kneeling thingy (does anyone know the official name?) on the backs of all the pews. Or like when Abe, used to Catholic communion, ate his wafer before the cup was passed to him and had nothing to dip into the wine. But it was a good experience anyway.In fact, even though the service started at 10 am (and, those who know me know that … [Read more...]

Weekend reads!

There's this trend among bloggers. Many bloggers will, once a week, dedicate their time to sharing some of their favorite reads from others. I love that! And, so, I'm going to jump on the band-wagon!Introducing, Weekend Reads!So, without further ado, here are some awesome reads from this week that I would like to share with you all!"Fucked Up" by Stitching Seams: A passionate, poignant piece on some of the painful after-effects of growing up in an abstinence-only world. If you read nothing … [Read more...]

What the “Effeminate Christianity” crisis says about women

The latest crisis in evangelical Christianity seems to be the "feminization" of the church.Now, I wasn't sure exactly what that meant. Even if we were to ignore the fact that there is no real definition of "femininity," and even if we were to judge "femininity" by strict societal expectations and stereotypes, what does that mean? It's not like the church is wearing lipstick and carrying a purse. And I've never heard a pastor say anything like, "The vagina cannot say to the hand, 'I don't need … [Read more...]

Happy Birthday to me and Martin Luther King Jr.!

It's my birthday today!And it's also Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday!I'm proud to share a birthday with such a great man. King is one of my heroes, as he is a great role model for non-violent activism. He made a difference without pulling any triggers or dispatching any troops. He taught me to believe that the power of love and non-violence can change the world.I'll let the man speak for himself. Here are a few of my favorite quotes by him (taken from A nation that c … [Read more...]

Diving into the ocean of religion

Interesting discussion on yesterday's post, friends!In case you missed it, yesterday I responded to the viral video that's been going around the interwebs lately--Jeffersen Bethke's "Why I Hate Religion But Love Jesus." I argued that religion and Jesus are not incompatible. In fact, in order to have a "relationship" with Jesus, we need to take action--action that, for many people, looks like religion.I really wrote that post to myself. I do that a lot--write things to myself. Writing is how I … [Read more...]

It’s not a religion, it’s a relationship?

When I was growing up, and people asked about my religion, I would parrot the phrase I'd heard from countless well-meaning pastors, Sunday school teachers, and friends. You know the one..."It's not a religion. It's a relationship."Then, there's the viral video that's been going around lately. I'm sure you've seen it making the rounds on Facebook, Twitter, and the Blogosphere:"Why I hate religion, but love Jesus."(side note: for an excellent response to this video, check out Elizabeth … [Read more...]

I’m pro-life. I’m pro-choice. I’m pro-woman.

I'm pro-choice.Therefore, I am pro-life.I'm pro-life.Therefore, I am pro-choice.I couldn't be one without being the other and my support for each side strengthens the other.Let me 'splain....No, there is too much. Let me sum up.I'll start with this--even though the exact point at which human life begins cannot be pin-pointed by science, I still feel uncomfortable with the concept of abortion. I'd like to think that I, personally, would never get an abortion (though, the way I reacted … [Read more...]