The Resilient Redwood: Lessons from Nature on Community, Faith and Remembrance

The coastal redwood trees in Muir Woods, California, are “the tallest of living things on Earth!” They can grow up to 350 feet tall with a lifespan of 2,000 years or more. Yet the roots of these arborous giants are surprisingly shallow: sometimes only 6 feet deep, with no taproot at all. So, how are they able to live so long and to grow so tall without toppling over? How do they survive earthquakes, fires, windstorms, and other trees falling against them? 

The secret is their interconnectedness. For although each tree’s roots are quite shallow compared to their massive height, their root system spreads horizontally outward as far as 100 feet from the trunk, intertwining with the roots of other redwoods for additional stability. These groves thrive together in thick community, so they can withstand the tremendous forces of nature. Yet the key is not individual depth, but relational width as they live in the embrace of others. Even when one redwood dies, its decay returns centuries of nutrients back into the root system to nourish the other trees. The community then replaces that deceased member by sending up a new sprout up from its roots.

Likewise, the church must be God’s support system for those who struggle in a fallen world. So, as we minister to families dealing with dementia and also to their caregivers, let us consider God’s good word to his church. 

Listen Well

First, be good listeners (Jas 1:19). Recall how each person’s story of faith fits into God’s greater story. Honor each person by listening well, even if their words don’t always make sense. Be patient and kind because those with dementia don’t always speak in linear thoughts. Instead, piece together fragments. Listen for themes and repetition. One daughter put together a memory book for her mother. She found old photos and a marriage certificate, family prayers and poems and Scripture passages that seemed to be meaningful.

According to Benjamin Mast in Second Forgetting: Remembering the Power of the Gospel during Alzheimer’s Disease: “She honored her mother by making sure the book was carefully constructed, artistically designed, and tailored to cover the details of [her mother’s] long life. . . . [And] each time [her mother] looked at the books, she was able to recognize the pictures and items, and she experienced great joy in doing so. Remarkably, each time she opened it was like seeing the book for the first time. Each time it felt like a brand-new gift from her daughter.”

Some of you love to scrapbook, create websites, or record video testimonies. You can help a family hold onto these precious memories by listening well.

Remember the Lord

Most importantly, help them to remember the Lord. Point each family to the sovereignty and the grace of God as you try out different methods to stir their memory. Sometimes it’s music: Those who can barely hold a coherent conversation might still be able to sing an entire song they learned in childhood or listen with teary eyes to a familiar tune. One woman in our church turns 100 this week. She doesn’t remember many things or even people’s names, but she will sing along with perfect recollection when she hears a hymn.

Another entryway might be the reading of Scripture: Reading the Bible is not just a cognitive experience when we possess the indwelling Holy Spirit. For if the Spirit could impact our hearts while we were dead in our sin, then certainly he can impact our hearts while we suffer the effects of dementia. So, don’t stop reading Scripture to your loved ones. Let them hear the Word of God preached on Sundays, even via livestream or recording. You may be surprised by how it lights up certain portions of their soul.

Memory can also be tactile like observing the Lord’s Supper. At our church, we observe communion on a regular basis because we are prone to forgetfulness. We all have some aspect of spiritual dementia. So in 1 Corinthians 11, Paul remembers what he “received from the Lord” and the sacrifice of Christ’s shed blood. He fights hard against spiritual dementia by using object lessons like the Lord’s Table: “For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes” (vv. 23–26). Observing the communion strikes multiple senses at once: vision, hearing, smell, taste, and touch. It also reminds us that we are part of a greater whole as this remembrance takes place in community.

Practice these spiritual rhythms—familiar routines which bring comfort to our loved ones. Schedule regular times for reading Scripture, singing hymns, praying together, taking communion. Bring church to them by visiting in their home. Dementia may affect their short-term memory loss, but a person who can’t remember what they had for lunch might still be able to joyously sing a familiar hymn or perfectly recite Psalm 23. Incidentally, this is one good reason to keep memorizing Scripture today. Lock it into your long-term memory, so that you’ll have it even after you’ve grown old. Make Scripture so much a part of you that remembering becomes like a reflex. Integrate these spiritual disciplines in your daily life today and they might come more naturally should your memory begin to fail.

Keep Longing for Home

Finally, know that even if others forget, God will not. Even in the midst of suffering, God remains always at our side. He knows us and loves us whether or not we have fully-functioning bodies and brains. And our brokenness merely increases our longing for home, for Christ is our dwelling place. The Lord himself is our home (Ps 90:1; 2 Cor 5:6–8).

That’s the gospel for dementia—that we were created to dwell with God. The Fall shut the door on that relationship for a time, but Christ’s redemption blasted open the door again. And one day, we will live fully and freely in God’s forever presence. Only in God do we find such perfect peace and belonging, security and joy. Only in God is our hope assured. As Dr. Mast reminds all of us who live in a fallen world, “One day we will be home again, dwelling with the Lord—the ultimate fulfillment of all of his promises. There will be no more death, mourning, crying, or pain. There will be no more agitation, no more wandering and getting lost, no more resisting care, no more confusion, no more delusions, no more screaming, and no more fears for what the future holds. Apathy will be replaced with rejoicing and anxiety with perfect peace and there will be no more forgetting.”  That’s a home we can surely look forward to!