When you have kids, time seems to always be an issue. There is simply not enough of it…especially when it comes to Mommy and Daddy getting some “alone time”. Yes, I am talking about sex here. And, yes, we need to be having lots of it…even with kiddos in the house.
But, let’s be really honest…it’s a lot easier said than done. So, what are we supposed to do? Well, we have to make physical intimacy a priority, and that often means we have to schedule it. I know…I know…sounds a little lame, but everything else is on our schedule, so why not sex? When we have so many other things fighting for our time, our marriage and yes, sex, gets pushed to the back burner. We have to prevent this from happening. Many times, this takes strategic, creative planning. And, yes, there are various ways to set the stage. Here are 3 parent hacks to get you and your partner some mommy-daddy “alone time”:
1. The “Getting Ready” Tactic
This might be the one Dave and I have used most. Okay, that may be too much information, but I’m just keeping it real. This scenario is one in which we make sure our kids are safely occupied for around thirty minutes or so…maybe using an iPad, reading a book, or watching a movie, etc.. Then, we just tell them that Mommy and Daddy are “getting ready” and head to the bedroom. This tactic can be used any time of the day. Yes, it works. And, no, my kids haven’t figured it out yet or walked in on us. Oh, and please lock your doors. No kid wants to walk in on their parents’ love fest.
2. Lunch Break Love
This is a great tactic when you both have a lunch break and the kids are at school or daycare. Who says lovemaking has to happen at night? Why not set a lunch date at the house? In fact, how fun would it be to surprise your spouse and meet him/her at the house for a little rendezvous? Don’t be afraid to spice things up. This takes a little planning, but it is well worth it.
3. Early Bedtime
This hack might be the most practical of them all. Tell the kids that everyone needs to “hit the hay” earlier than usual one or two nights a week, and use this time to reconnect with each other in the Biblical sense. If you have older kids, you can give them something else to do like listen to music, read, or watch television if the bedtime seems a bit too early for them. As parents, WE set the bedtimes. So, we can take full advantage of the extra hour or two.
These 3 tactics are certainly not rocket science, yet so many of us have a hard time making our sex lives a priority. It seems unimportant to many of us, but it is vital to our marriages. We need to connect with our partner on every level – physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally – to build and maintain a strong marriage. Check out “5 Ways to Reconnect with Your Spouse”, for more on this.
So, let’s talk about how we can be having MORE sex with our husband/wife. Ask each other these questions:
What time of day works best for you to enjoy it most?
How often do you want to be having sex?
Where do you enjoy it most?
What can I do to enhance our sex life?
The more we are open with each other about our expectations and desires, the better. Let’s get excited about it. Try one or all of the three parent hacks discussed earlier. Come up with a new hack and share it with the rest of us!
Let’s build up to it by texting each other flirtatiously, buying and wearing nice lingerie, lighting candles, or running bubble baths. We should be having the best sex around. We are married! God designed sex for US. Let’s have more of it and enjoy it. The kids will be fine in the other room.
For more on how to build and maintain a better sex life, check out our latest resource “Best Sex Life Now”, by clicking here.
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Thanks for reading and sharing. Be blessed!