3 Reasons DEMANDS AND THREATS are Killing Your Marriage

2.  It cuts off healthy communication.

In an ultimatum, one spouse places themselves in a position of authority over the other, instead of striving to work TOGETHER.  Therefore, the spouse receiving the ultimatum is left our in the cold and expected to rise to the occasion while the spouse giving the ultimatum stands and watches.  This is unhealthy and against the heart of marriage.  If there are problems–even if one spouse brought the problem on himself/herself–we must do our best to work TOGETHER toward healing and reconciliation.  And, an ultimatum is NOT the way to get there.

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http://sixseeds.patheos.com/ashleywillis/4-ways-women-have-an-affair/