The MOST IMPORTANT Words You can Say to Your Spouse

2.  I forgive you.

This is probably even harder than saying “I’m sorry” at times.  My husband, Dave Willis, is an amazing pastor and author, and he explains forgiveness in a way that has helped me to understand it so much better.  He says,

“Forgiveness can’t be earned; It can only be given.  Trust, however, cannot be given; It can only be earned.  Therefore, we must forgive quickly, yet trust slowly”

We must forgive quickly, especially in our marriages, because unforgiveness can take hold like a parasite in our hearts.  Eventually, we become a host to debilitating resentment.

When we forgive, we are not telling our spouse that his/her offense was okay or that it didn’t hurt us deeply.  We are simply saying, “I choose to love you through this, and I am willing to slowly trust you once again.  I am not holding this offense against you any longer.”

As Christians, we understand we have been forgiven of our sins due to the ultimate sacrifice God made for us by sending His one and only Son, Jesus, to the cross to pay for our sins…just so we can have a relationship with him and freedom from the shackles of sin and shame.  If God is willing to forgive me for the many sins I have committed and will commit in my life, I must be willing to forgive my husband, even when it is extremely difficult.  If not, the lack of forgiveness will not only poison our relationship, but it can and will destroy me.

#3 is at the heart of your marriage vows…