
“With all vigilance guard your heart, for in it are the sources of life.” – Proverbs 4:23 NABRE
Empathy, compassion and self-control – these are probably some of the most important things we want to teach our children. We want to raise a generation that knows how to love and to be loved. A generation with their hearts set in the right place so that they can make this world a better place.
Living in this digital age, however, we are faced with a challenge never before faced by those who preceded us. At a time when children can spend more time with their devices than with their parents, how do we protect their hearts?
According to the Pew Research Center, two-thirds of parents asked believe that parenting today is harder than 20 years ago. Of these parents, 26% think that this is because of technology.
Considering that most teenagers today visit social media sites and play video games frequently, it’s no wonder that screen time can affect the hearts and minds of the young.
Here are just some of the ways digital devices can influence the behavior of the young:
1. Violence and brutal content
Children and teens are often exposed to violent games that desensitize their emotions when it comes to cruelty.
How can they learn compassion when they play video games that aim to injure and take another person’s life? And it’s not only games that are against zombies, aliens or other monsters out there. These games have already come so close to an alternate world where the players can freely commit crimes and exhibit brutality against other human beings.
Even the videos watched by kids and other content shared over social media can contain and even glorify these violent acts. Some may be shown as cheap entertainment that contains dark humor, making fun of the pain inflicted upon other people.
Digital content similar to this can numb the emotion and reinforce callousness instead of helping the young ones develop compassion and form a good conscience.
2. Instant gratification and risk-taking
When risk-taking and impulsiveness are taken to an extreme, it can disrupt the correct pattern of thinking that influences proper behavior.
So many games today thrive on addicting schemes that include the need for non-stop action, unending goals and sporadic rewards.
Meanwhile, social media content is viewed constantly as users scroll mindlessly for hours, wasting time they could have spent elsewhere being more creative or engaging in authentic human interactions.
If not regulated, these activities can form a mind pattern and behavior that thrives only on pleasure, novelty and instant gratification, losing the ability for self-discipline and control.
3. The vanity of comparison
Social media often presents lives that are near-perfect. They do not show the true struggles of people behind the lavish lifestyles and unattainable luxuries.
As a result, users are tempted to engage in this game of creating the perfect image and exaggerating their status and achievements.
All of these things that tend to inflate the ego drive one to be puffed up with oneself instead of trying to empathize with other people’s struggles and needs.
People can learn to be self-centered and narcissistic, caring only about themselves.
4. Explicit content
Surfing the internet is not the same as watching in movie theatres where there is an obvious ban for young ones when it comes to adult films.
With the internet, children can easily watch shows that are not suitable for their age. Hence, they can be exposed to explicit content without their parents’ awareness. Even some games that are very easy to download can contain inappropriate content for young ones.
With social media and a lot of sites that allow communication with strangers, children can be very vulnerable to unsuitable content and even abuse from others.
How Do We Protect Our Children’s Hearts
Technology in itself is not evil, but it is in the way we use it that we reap the consequences of our actions.
It is the same with how we let our children use technology. In this digital age, we can no longer keep them from using mobile phones or other gadgets. However, we can place limits, regulate their use and make sure that we give them more than the content that they can find in the virtual world.
Here are some of the things we can do to help raise the young in this digital age:
1. Set and observe clear limits
Set a clear boundary when it comes to screen time, e.g., only a given number of hours per week. Certain periods, such as mealtime or the hour before bedtime, can be freed from mobile phone use. A certain age can also be set when it would be best to begin using a particular device.
Further, parental control can be placed for some apps or devices. The downloading and playing of games with too much violence can be forbidden.
2. Guide children in the proper use of digital devices
Instead of letting the young ones use their digital devices by themselves, parents can also find the time to use such devices together. That way, they can guide their children and bond with them at the same time. They can also observe their interests and recommend better ways to engage with digital content.
3. Teach the young virtues that can be applied online
Virtues can be applied even in the virtual world. The important thing here is for parents and other guardians to identify them and encourage their practice.
An example will be in teaching kids about the virtue of patience. Many children find it hard to wait for videos or apps to even load. Learning how to wait will be a virtue that can help them for life.
4. Form deep and healthy bonds beyond the virtual world
We must teach the children beyond the time they spend using their gadgets. Virtue should start in their daily encounters with people.
It would be very hard to influence them without building a solid relationship that they can consider more important than their online acquaintances.
5. Teach the value of prayer and silence
Young people can spend most of their day with noise and many distractions. It is vital to teach them the value of spending time in prayer and silence.
Join them as they read the Bible. Or simply take a walk together while talking about their day and sharing with them your faith.
6. Use devices in learning about the faith
While technology can often be misused, it can also be used for good. Why not make the most of the digital resources we have today to help the young learn more about the faith?
Let them watch Bible stories or inspirational films. Encourage them to use faith-based apps and devotionals.
7. Find the good and the beautiful in the virtual and real world
The world is still filled with good and beautiful things. Awaken your children’s sense of wonder and lead them towards the path of goodness, beauty and truth.
A short trip to nature can awaken their appreciation for God’s creation. Hearing an uplifting song can help them recognize what their souls are longing for.
The Value of a Pure Heart
God is love and God loves us. But for that love to heal us, guide us and lead our lives, we must allow it to abide in our hearts.
If our hearts are full of other things, or if it is calloused or closed, it would be hard to love and to be loved.
That is why it is very important to take care of our hearts. And that is why it is our duty to protect the hearts of the young.
From an early age, they must be guided to form a good conscience that can distinguish right from wrong. They must develop empathy and compassion so that they can be charitable to their neighbor. And they must learn patience, kindness and self-control.
While technology is important, it must never replace the value of human relationships. After all, we were not made in the likeness of machines. We were created in the very image and likeness of God!
“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.” – Matthew 5:8 NRSVCE
“Something’s wrong if we spend more time on our cell phones than with people. The screen makes us forget that there are real people behind it who breathe, laugh and cry…Let us pray that the use of the new technologies will not replace human relationships, will respect the dignity of the person, and will help us face the crises of our times.” – Pope Francis
“Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 NRSVCE
Jocelyn Soriano is the author of the book Defending My Catholic Faith. “You and I have been called to live at this very hour.” Do you have questions or doubts about the Catholic faith?
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