How to be a Giveasheetmotherfather

How to be a Giveasheetmotherfather August 11, 2023

“You’re a real giveasheetmotherfather,” said my client, Dave. (Although, that’s not his real name and those weren’t his actual words.)

How to be a Giveasheetmotherfather. Black and white photo of bearded homeless man smiling
Image by Leroy Skalstad from Pixabay

Why Do You Care So Much?

“Why are you so nice to me?” my homeless client asked with slurred speech. His hair was disheveled, and his body was unwashed. The mouth beneath his shaggy beard smelled like cigarettes, alcohol, and unbrushed teeth. He was quick at dropping word bombs that were fouler than his breath. Fruit flies swarmed the hotel room, gorging on strewn-about food scraps. This alcoholic, drug user, liar, and indigent womanizer swayed a bit as he asked, “Why do you care so much?”

In church, they taught me to wait for moments just like this, and answer something like, “Because Jesus loves you, and I do, too!”  I heard this so often that I must admit that this was the first answer my little brain thought of. Thank God, I didn’t say it!

“Cuz my mama taught me to be nice” was the next thing I thought–but that just sounded stupid, even to myself. What I finally said was “Because I believe everybody deserves to be cared for.”  And that was exactly what he needed to hear.

 

A Missed Opportunity?

The next thing my brain told me was, “You just missed an opportunity to witness to him about Jesus!”  Yes, that fundamentalist on my right shoulder can sometimes speak quite loudly. But then the liberal on my left shoulder said, “No you didn’t. That six-inch cross tattooed on your forearm says everything. If he can see Jesus in your eyes, you don’t need to take the Lord’s name in vain by forcing it down someone’s throat.”

 

My Witness

This client isn’t the kind that responds to syrupy sweet religious aphorisms. He is the type to choke when he hears Christianese. So, I need to be careful about “my Christian witness.” If I respond by taking the opportunity to try to convert him, he’ll say my kindness comes from a desire to proselytize. But if I simply accept his swear words as the compliment he intends, and continue to show genuine care, he’ll know that there’s a genuine heart that lies behind what he calls “nice.”

I don’t need to tell him about Jesus to be a good witness for Christianity. My witness is when I drive him to the post office to check his general delivery mail for people experiencing homelessness. It’s the way I listen to him tell how his entire family died in an accident. It’s the way I treat him without judgment and love him the way Jesus would.

 

Giveasheetmotherfather—The Best Compliment to Give a Christian

Unfortunately, many believers upon receiving such foul language would take offense and even lecture the speaker for his unchristian words. Instead, I hope I acted more like Jesus by not talking about Jesus. Because ill-timed religious speech can do more to turn a person off than attract them to Jesus. Being an example of Christlike compassion means more than asking people to “invite him into their hearts as their Lord and Savior.”  It means loving people through the swarms of flies, taking care of them in sickness, and showing yourself to be a real giveasheetmotherfather. In fact, that may be the best compliment anyone can give a Christian!

 

For related reading, check out my other articles:

 

About Gregory Smith
I live in the beautiful Fraser Valley of British Columbia and work in northern Washington State as a behavioral health specialist with people experiencing homelessness and those who are overly involved in the criminal justice system. Before that, I spent over a quarter-century as lead pastor of several Virginia churches. My newspaper column, “Spirit and Truth” ran in Virginia newspapers for a dozen years. My wife Christina and I have seven children between us, and we are still collecting grandchildren. You can read more about the author here.
"Thank you, Summers-lad. And thanks for your readership!"

“I’m Sorry, Eh?”—How to Apologize Like ..."
"This Patheos article is sadly just the usual projections that Progressives are renowned for."

Trumpsters’ Trauma Response: Fight, Flight, Freeze, ..."
"Excellent point about "we regarded him stricken". I hadn't picked up on that before, but ..."

“I’m Sorry, Eh?”—How to Apologize Like ..."
"This is a moving read, and it takes courage to make so open a confession. ..."

Racism in the Pews: A Pastor’s ..."

Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!