SELLER SAYS IT’S IN PERFECT CONDITION

I love ebay. I shop a lot on ebay for all things old and forgotten.

I act on trust. ‘It’s in perfect condition,’ the seller says, and I go with that. Going with that doesn’t mean I believe what the seller says. That would run contrary to my perfect Zen, which is all about impaling any belief, as soon as it tries to sneak itself up on me. No thanks.

But without acting on it, there’s no object enthroning itself in my house.

Today I was in pain about bidding on an old thing, whose optical capacity and sharpness was advertised as ‘in perfect condition.’

I vacillated. Should I or should I not? I even performed a horary astrology reading. The thing itself was represented by the Sun in an angular house. ‘Hell yes, the lens is sharp;’ the price in a cadent house in my advantage. I myself was represented by the Moon, conjunct the fixed star Algol. ‘Hell, no.’ This star is one of the most malefic, associated with decapitation.

I was so scared that I moved on to the cards. Usually they’re not nearly as scary. And yet.

Let’s see. Two days ago I received a beautiful gift in the form of a pack of Lenormand cards, designed by John Frank Guidry. He did these cards while taking the Lenormand Foundation Course with me, and he wanted to offer them to the community, as a way of saying thanks for all the inspiration. The cards are available at production cost only here.

The X marks the spot

My partner, Bent Sørensen, threw himself at the cards enthusiastically, and he ended up designing a whole spread for them.

I thought of taking this spread for a test, and ask a question pertaining to my ebay purchase.

Here’s the mechanics for this spread called, X marks the spot, in his own words:

“Lay out nine cards in an X shape, leaving the center card turned downwards. Read the four paths to the hidden ‘treasure’ – X marking the spot where it’s ‘buried’. Put a tenth card over the X card for a clue as to what the treasure is. Read the spread as a whole with this card as the key. Then remove the clue card, and flip over the ‘true’ center card to see what your treasure really is. Did you guess from the reading of the four paths and the ‘fake’ clue?”

Let’s see what my cards have to say about the value of this treasure, now that I’ve been hunting for it quite a while.

The upper left hand path goes from Ring to Scythe. Not good. The right hand path goes from Tower to Whip. Worse, as the optical device is in fact a Tower that will give me a lot of hassle.

The false clue is the Bear. Not good. What I need is a solid and stolid object that’s not just seemingly strong. I can only imagine what’s underneath.

The lower lefthand path goes from the Moon to the Letter. Right, the seller is bullshitting me.

The lower right hand path goes from the Stork to the Heart. I see this one speaking directly about my own changing heart, even as I read these cards.

I now turn over the card that marks this treasure that I’m hunting, and guess what, it’s the Coffin. What did I just say, that the cards are not nearly as scary as Algol? Obviously I lied. This is scary.

Now, if I were a pirate, I might grab the opportunity to dig this chest full of diamonds, and in all secrecy do my own thing with what’s in it. But I’m not a pirate, so that settles it. No bidding on ebay today.

Wish me luck next time. Obviously I’m crazy enough to let the stars and the cards decide what course of action I should take. But as they say, it’s better not to mess with the perfect condition.

Keep hunting.

P.S. John Frank Guidry wrote this to my partner in a private conversation about this spread: “I love the hidden treasure idea. It’s funny you came up with that because a lot of my ancestors were pirates in Acadie, though not very good ones. Most were hung trying to steal British ships.”

♠

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