Photo Attribution: Used under fair use act; Photo source from Christianity Today article “Tullian Tchividjian, Billy Graham’s grandson, tweets ‘I’m so so sorry’ after affair”
When my late mother died of Multiple Sclerosis in 2013, mourners sat faithfully in the sanctuary of the Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in Fort Lauderdale, Florida on a Sunday afternoon to pay their respects to my mother at her funeral. It was fitting that she had her memorial service in the church where she met my dad, saw all 3 of her sons baptized, and beamed with pride as she watched my bride come up the aisle. This church was home, and still is. Among the mourners that came to quietly pay their respects that day was the Rev. Tullian Tchvidjian. I must begin by saying this is a man whom I consider to be my friend and, for a short while, my pastor. He would be the first to admit that He is a sinner in need of God’s grace, just like me. These reflections to follow will, in no way, change that.
I grew up in Coral Ridge Presbyterian… and when I say it was big… it was BIG. Dr D. James Kennedy, my pastor for over 19 years, built this church from a small congregation of 8 to a church of thousands in just about 45 years. He did so, in part, through a very firm commitment to evangelism, and, in part, by a firm commitment to not shy away from controversial issues (or even to publically embrace them from a scriptural perspective). As a child, it was not uncommon to see television cameras rolling down the aisle as we sang the opening hymn. Kennedy’s fame made him an icon, which I suspect, would be the last thing he wanted. Nevertheless, his fame snowballed and he eventually found his popularity rooted not for being a preacher or a scholar of the scriptures (both of which he was), but rather for being an orator and statesmen, defending the truth of Christ in the face of secular opposition. His silver hair, blue robe, and highly raised pulpit became symbols of what Coral Ridge stood for. My church leaned on these icons very heavily, for many years… and when you lean on something heavily other than God Himself, He tends to take it away. So when the final chords of Handel’s “Hallelujah Chorus” faded into the high rafters at the conclusion of Dr. Kennedy’s elaborate funeral, the church found itself at an unfamiliar crossroads. We’d never searched for a new pastor before.
As we did, one name became obvious. Tullian Tchvidjian. He was young. He was local, pastoring a church right there in Fort Lauderdale. He was a Graham, grandson of the famed evangelist Billy Graham, the first man ever to preach in Coral Ridge’s beautiful sanctuary. He seemed the ideal candidate and that concerned him. He refused the search committee’s advances the first two times, and conceded to an interview the third. In an age where many wanted a carbon-copy of D. James Kennedy, Tullian’s style was different. He didn’t wear a robe (and often times, no tie either). He declined to preach an evening service or be the face of Evangelism Explosion. He refused to be a political-issues preacher and focused more on what “sinners” need than what “America” needs. He was not Kennedy. This fact alone caused many in the church to leave Coral Ridge and form another church, which, if you were to attend worship there today, would be an exact replica of “the way things used to be at Coral Ridge”, just in a high school gymnasium, rather than a cathedral-esque sanctuary. Some distrguntled former members even went as far as to distribute anti-Tullian paraphernalia in the parking during worship or compare him to Hitler in the interview Q&A session. The transition was not, by any means, seamless.
Tullian was not deterred. The merger of the two churches gave him more than enough people to keep the church operational and the new member class was growing by leaps and bounds. The church phased out the majority of the old-guard “pastoral staff”, replacing them with new “directors”. His preaching highly emphasized grace and freedom from the law. Christians didn’t have to “do anything”, but rather just “live under the banner of ‘It Is Finished’ ”. This drew some heavy criticism from prominent reformed theologians and pastors, some even going as far as to call him antinomian. This ultimately led to his eventual dismissal as a contributor to The Gospel Coalition. This message, particularly in regards to his position on sanctification, gave him problems at home too. When you’re told “you don’t have to do anything” to win God’s favor… and that is all you are told… then pastors should not be surprised when people are not volunteering to help with VBS… declining to attend Sunday School or small groups… not signing up for marriage conferences or parenting seminars… not putting tithe (let alone offering) in the plate. The few old-school Coral Ridgers that were left began to phase themselves out of this new way of doing things. They resigned from church boards and sessions. They joined other churches, and so on. Sanctification and the continual “pursuit of holiness” (as Jerry Bridges famously called it) just didn’t seem to be a priority for this new pastoral administration. Neither did teaching God’s word. The gospel of grace was great for the rebellious sinner (previously hurt by legalistic religion) to receive Christ and come to church again… but not so good when that same person became hungry and desired to grow in their new faith. When they feel they don’t have to “do” anything, they will find the nourishment of the scripture and the “growing in grace and truth” to be lacking in their own lives.
It was around this time that the scandals started. Now, we had known scandal at Coral Ridge before, but it was always because of the opposition to the truth that was preached… never because of what someone did. First, it came out that our amazingly-proficient worship leader, Mark, was caught in adultery. Tullain encouraged showing him grace and support in his stepping down from ministry and renewing his own repentance. Then, most recently in June 2015, Tullian himself confessed to the same sin of adultery (a “moral failure”, the church called it). From what I understand, some of the staff and the entire session knew about this for a while and kept it hush-hush (but that is speculative, or even hearsay, and I cannot confirm it). Tullian came forward and rightly resigned his post as pastor (pictured above in Christianity Today Article), leaving the congregation both shocked and yet again directionless. Their search for a new pastor has begun and, for this, they have my prayers every day.
So what is it that we can take away from this public indiscretion? Is it just another high-profile minister that cheated on his wife and caused a scandal, as most media outlets would have you believe? Is it just another stain on the battle uniform of Christendom? Or is it something more? Is there a lesson of grace that we can learn here… nuggets of truth that we can use to grow in righteousness? I prefer the latter. So while I ask you to put down your pointer finger, if it is pointed in the direction of my friend Tullian…. And while I ask you to respect his (and his family’s) privacy, as he has requested… I also ask you to learn from his very public example and apply a few scriptural truths to your own heart:
–The Bigger They Are… The Harder They Fall: In an age where the “mega-church” (evangelical or not) is thriving, pastors in leadership situations within these settings are prime targets for the devil, because he knows that their compromise (their “moral failure”) will do damage to the Christian church in a very public way, projecting a wide shadow of negative influence. Pastors, then, are to be devoted to prayer, training themselves in righteousness, and to letting all see their progress (1 Timothy 4). This is not a time to bring up “the Graham rule” again (as useful as that may be). This is a time to pray for our own pastor, to encourage his growth in righteousness, to strengthen his walk and seek to build up his family as they faithfully serve us. This is often hard, in part, because…
–Church Discipline is (by and large) non-existent in many churches: In this tolerant, hyper-sensitive society, no one wants to tell someone one… anyone… let alone their pastor… that he is making potentially sinful lifestyle decisions. While a high-profile pastor, Tullian had a very social lifestyle (in the nightlife of South Florida and elsewhere). Within these settings, there were numerous temptations to sin. What would you have said to him, as one of his church elders? How would you have handled news of his affair? Paul encourages us to rebuke one another (2 Timothy 3:16-17, for example). It’s not pleasant, but we as church members, especially those elected to serve the church, have an accountability to spur our pastor on toward righteousness, avoiding “even the appearance of evil” (1 Thessalonians 5:22), just as much as that pastor is to do so in our lives as well. The pastor just happens to be under the microscope of public scrutiny a lot more than you are. In short, if your church is afraid of discipline for its members and accountability (among the leadership) for the pastor and his lifestyle choices, then it opens up its pastor and its body to the fiery darts of the evil one.
–The Two-Sided Coin: Grace, in Christ, most definitely frees us from the law, which previously stood to condemn us in our sinful, unregenerate state (Romans 8:1-2). This salvation is certainly free from works on our part and is solely by grace (Ephesians 2). In the reception of it, we don’t have to “do” anything. Christ has kept the law where we could not. However, on the other side of the coin, that doesn’t mean we are outside of the law. The Reformation Study Bible puts it this way: “The law is not opposed to the love and goodness of God, but shows what it is IN ACTION.” (emphasis added). It is because we don’t have to “do” anything for salvation (thanks be to God)… it is because of this that our hearts, in Christ, should be overflowing with gratitude, to the point where we want to grow in righteousness and sanctification. “If you love me, you will obey my commandments”, Jesus said. Remember, you are saved both from something (the curse of sin and the law), but you are also save to something (pursuit of righteousness and good works in Christ). As a minister called to proclaim the whole counsel of God, you cannot neglect either side of the coin. If you neglect grace, you become a legalistic bible-thumping pastor, full of rules and finger-pointing, which will scare non-believers or new believers away. If, on the other hand, you neglect the pursuit the righteousness in the works of sanctification, emphasizing only grace, you’ll become an enabler for people who have their “golden ticket” of salvation and feel they never have to seek to grow themselves into obedient servants of Christ, showing forth the fruit of that salvation. The two go hand-in-hand and must be preached, and believed, as one.
–We Must Reexamine Our Perception of the Boundaries of Forgiveness: When we (particularly as believers) become quick to point the finger at a high-profile, very public figure in the church of Jesus Christ, we become, in a way, like the unmerciful servant. We do so in that we forget the devastatingly larger amount of sin of which we have been forgiven. We forget that we too have committed adultery to our husband, Christ Jesus, in the context of our own sin (see the book of Hosea). We go the way of reality TV shows and late-night talk show comedians. We show somebody who, currently, appears to be in worse shape than we are. This entertains us not because of their poor choices, but because we feel better about ourselves by comparison. Its classic schadenfreude and we need to repent of it, if we profess the name of Jesus Christ. We also need to remove it from our thinking when we face…
–The Restoration Debate: The discussion will inevitably arise, as it has with Driscoll and others, of how long should we wait before we consider restoring this once high-profile pastor to a public ministry position. Should we restore him at all? If you are of the “one and done” persuasion with regard to a minister who sins, let me just say that I am so glad that God doesn’t take the same approach with you. A call to Christian ministry, I’ve often said, is like matter. It never dies, it merely changes forms. Sure Tullian, and other publically disgraced pastors like him, have a dark time ahead of them. Their light of the gospel now doesn’t shine as brightly as it once did. Their gifts may not be used in as effective and impactful a manner as they once were. However, does that negate the positive work these men have done in ministry in the past? Does that negate the people they’ve lead to the Lord, the individuals they’ve baptized, the broken hearts they’ve mended, and the souls they’ve encouraged? By no means. So then why do we often act like it does? A minister has to evaluate his own heart first, before finding a ministry context to return to in the future. Should a ministry, or even a church, call Tullian in the future, that should be applauded in grace, not scowled in condemnation. I say this, of course, with one obvious prerequisite still intact… and that, of course, is…
–Repentance: The Divine U-Turn: You think discipline is an unpopular word in churches… How about repentance? Yet , what was the first word Jesus spoke in His earthly ministry? Repent (Matthew 4:17). This is something that is not only beneficial to all of us, but it is demanded of all of us, both once-and-for-all (in salvation) and continually (in daily Christian living). If it is mandatory in salvation and mandatory in sanctification, why would we not also demand it in pastoral restoration? Most disgraced ministers would not have a problem being repentant for what they have done. So why, then, are so many churches so hesitant to let the healing begin? Is it because their own feelings have been hurt? Is it because their church’s reputation in the local religious community (or worse) has been damaged? How does that help to conform this man, who gave years of his life to your congregation, back (more and more) into the image of Christ? Moreover, why is it not possible for that sinner to find restoration in repentance (and once again be used by God) and yet is perfectly acceptable for sinners like you and I to find that same restoration every day? My heart today is not to call Tullian to repentance. He knows that against God and God alone has he sinned (Psalm 51:4). Rather, my hearts feels led to call you and I to repentance. Why are we more concerned about this young minister in the news than running after our own righteousness? Why are more concerned with socially crucifying him than with crucifying our own flesh? Why are we allowing the deference of our own sin to effect the use of our gifts in order to allow us to debate whether or not this man should be allowed to use his (clearly evident) gifts again? These are the questions we truly should be asking.
Tullian has been a great mirror in the past, reflecting the light of the gospel of grace from Heaven into our lives. Just because his mirror in ministry lies currently shattered, that doesn’t change its gospel reflectiveness into our lives, it only changes the angle. Oscar Wilde one wrote that “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars”. Our focus needs to be the same as another individual caught in adultery. Jesus told her two things: “I do not condemn you” and “Go and sin no more”. This is the doctrines of Justification and Sanctification reborn in the modern world and we, as spiritual adulterers, need to treasure both of these doctrines accordingly. When we do, we become saturated in Christ’s showers of grace and we find the strength to put our arms around our fellow brother in the gutter, and help him, yet again, to see the stars.
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