White People Like Being Spiritual

As it turns out, not only is being “spiritual but not religious” a spiritual and religious dead end, as I noted in People Who Find God in Sunsets and also here, it’s something white people like. It’s number two on the list in the book Stuff White People Like, in fact, under the heading “Religions Their Parents Don’t Belong To.”

White people will often say they are “spiritual” but not religious. This usually means that they believe in any religion that doesn’t involve Jesus. . . .

For the most part, white people prefer religions that produce artifacts and furniture that fit into their homes or wardrobe. They are also particularly drawn to religions that don’t require a lot of commitment or donations.

When a white person tells you “I’m a Buddhist/Hindu/Kabbalahist,” the best thing to do is ask how they arrived at their religious decision. The story will usually involve a trip to Thailand or a college class on religion.

Note for those who have no idea what I’m on about: Stuff White People Like was a great fad six to eight years ago because it identified a certain kind of hip, earnest, trendy, affluent, self-regarding, and basically shallow person. I had forgotten about it, actually, but found the book on the last chance shelf at a bookshop. It’s not hysterically funny but it is entertaining because the writer gets the thing right.

P.S.: The satire works in part because you can see yourself in it, though how much you enjoy it depends on the extent to which you can say, or can talk yourself into believing, that you’re not that bad. Which feeling of partial but strictly limited regret and embarrassment is another thing white people like.