Daylight AtheismOriginally posted on Atlas Shrugged: The Lilies of the Field.
Cobra Commander: Yech, I thought he would never leave.
Dagny Taggart: Well he had to go fix all the damage you caused yesterday.
Cobra Commander: Well he didn’t have to keep whining about it.
Dagny Taggart: He was whining because you shot him!
Cobra Commander: Only a few times. Besides he seemed fine after the doctor took a look at it. You seem fine too… shockingly enough.
Dagny Taggart: Well I’m a bit banged up…
Cobra Commander: I guess I of all people shouldn’t be complaining about someone surviving plane crashes. In any case, I wonder what I should go steal today….
Dagny Taggart: Now you’re going nowhere… I’ve got business to take care of!
Cobra Commander: Yes… I guess you would want to actually do something, considering you spent the whole of yesterday just being exposited at.
Dagny Taggart: Well it was all so fresh and new and exciting! How would you ever expect someone like me, a humble super competent super capitalist, to do anything but gush at how amazing everything was!
Cobra Commander: Yes, certainly. It would have been impossible to accomplish anything yesterday. Now, having knocked down a few buildings and stolen a modern wonder of technology, I’m really going to have to work to top myself today so if you’ll excuse me….
Dagny Taggart: Wait! At least don’t go until I’ve made breakfast.
Cobra Commander: Is… is that what you’re doing today?
Dagny Taggart: Of course, breakfast is the most important meal of the day, so obviously if my life was some kind of story, the act of me making breakfast would be naturally thrilling and very important.
Cobra Commander: Oh I’m sure it would be equally as important as going to investigate the technological marvel that this Gal t fellow invented.
Dagny Taggart: Hmmm… I’d say more so.
Cobra Commander: Right… while I could be learning about Ray Shield technology you’d rather me sit here learning about how you go about making toast. Definitely not a mind numbing use of my time.
Dagny Taggart: Well excuse me for having an obligation! While Galt is out arms deep in super science I have to do household chores! It’s only fair I repay him!
Cobra Commander: Ugh… wasn’t it creepy how he was looking at you?
Dagny Taggart: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Cobra Commander: He was just… I mean you’re all banged up and he was basically leering at you. I just know some disturbing thought was running through his head like he was envisioning you as a schoolgirl.
Dagny Taggart: How dare you!
Cobra Commander: Hey, I just call them like I see them. Not that he’d ever admit to it, I’m sure no one would ever think that kind of thought could ever be considered… romantic.
Dagny Taggart: Look, why do you keep distracting me when I’m just trying to get down to the all important business of squeezing oranges and reverently touching things?
Cobra Commander: You know what, you’re right. I could sit here and surely pick apart some absurdity about your breakfast preparations, this whole place is nothing but absurd so why should breakfast be any different… but why would I? Even with the little tour yesterday there’s countless unexplained mysteries waiting out beyond that door. This place is twisted and deranged, but I’m sure there’s whole acres of it I haven’t seen yet, and I’m looking forward to going out there and plundering it bit by bit.
Dagny Taggart: Well, you can go out and have thrilling adventures in this amazingly technologically advanced valley all you want. I, for one, am going to very methodically make breakfast and patiently wait for things to happen to me.
Cobra Commander: Ugh, I hate to say it, but I almost miss the you who crashed a plane into the side of a mountain on a hunch.
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