To the Women Waiting to Mother

To the Women Waiting to Mother May 10, 2018

This is my first official Mother’s Day as a mom. It’s been four years since I announced my “last” childless Mother’s Day. I was wrong about that year being my last – it took 3 years and 9 months to adopt.  Last year, we knew the baby girl that would become our daughter. She even spent Mother’s day with me. But this year is different. This year, I am her mama. Forever and ever amen.

(Adoption finalization – November, 2017)

As thrilled as I am, and as much as I am looking forward to celebrating my newfound motherhood, my heart is aching for the women still waiting to mother.

Those longing to see those sacred two lines on a pregnancy test.

Those praying their phones would ring with the news of an adoption match.

Those seeking to fulfill their desires to mother in non-traditional ways – because they know they will never have biological or adopted children.

My empathy is so great for you precious women that my heart hurts. A little bit of a cloud is getting in the way of an otherwise bright occasion. And I’m okay with that. Because I never want to forget. I don’t want others to forget either. In the midst of our own joy and celebrations, I simply do not want us to forget about the women who won’t be celebrating motherhood this year. Especially for those of us who have been in your shoes, I don’t want us to so easily cast aside the pain and suffering that we experienced. And I certainly don’t want us to forget that the Lord carried us through.

He will carry you through too.

I don’t know your outcome. Whether you’ll adopt, birth children, both, or neither. I don’t know how God will fulfill your longing for motherhood, but I know He will. I also know that reminder can ring hollow in the midst of heartache. I always believed we would adopt, but those years of waiting weren’t easy. And careless words from well-meaning people were worse than no words at all. But from someone who has truly been there, just know that you are not forgotten, you are not forsaken, and you are not going to wait forever.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him.

 

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