On a personal note, I’ve experienced loss. Surely, where I grieve matters. An example of why this is important is seen in the Book of Job. During a time of major suffering and loss, Job describes his friends as miserable comforters. God forbid I encounter such a tragedy on top of my existing one and am not grieving in the right places.
Grieving – The Tools I Need
I’m no stranger to the necessity of grieving a major loss of someone I deeply love. But with the proper tools and environments this time around, I am taking full advantage of the opportunities allotted to me. There is healing balm for me. My circle of support is praying for me – continuously and specifically. My environment is full of calm, serenity, and the freedom to heal.
Grieving – Falling Apart to Mend
I have permission to fall apart in all of my brokenness. Tears flow. Lamenting expression is released as early mornings on the house porch yield beautiful hummingbirds in my immediate view. Evening sunsets are full of wonder as the gardens of flowers bloom after their fill of the day’s sun. I need these beautiful reminders! Through them I understand that the God of creation is not just tending to my natural environment. However, He is tending to me too! And surely I am being put back together again by the Master builder himself – the Lord Almighty.
Grieving – Recovery Plan
God’s recovery plan for me positions me well to rest daily. This type of rest is not just exclusive to sleep. Although getting a healthy portion of shut-eye is important. This rest is found in returning to the needed routines of worship and devotion. I do this not just in the mornings, but also during impromptu moments throughout the day. Journaling, reflection, and meditation on Biblical scripture feed my soul and steer me to consistent wells of peace. Exploring new city and rural areas are renewing my sense of adventure. Navigating short road trips to the homes of those who love, receive, and support me are giving me hope. The non-judgmental ears of good listeners hear me and their words affirm and challenge me.
Grieving – Creating Safe Spaces for My Daughter
I take time to honor my nine year old daughter’s grieving process as well. Allowing her the freedom to explore and express her emotions has been a God-send. She knows that her words to me will not be criticized – as raw as they are sometimes. Her journey allows her space to also continue to do the things she really enjoys. These activities include things like: cooking at our temporary residence, enrolling in art and dance classes, making new friends at her homeschool co-op, exploring new places (with me), and spending time with her girl-pal cousins.
Grieving – The Days Ahead
Yes, I/we can look forward to the days ahead. This is where the notion of hope plays a major part of the grieving process. No, everyday will not yield a positive outlook on hummingbirds, gardens, sunsets, and travel excursions but I am certain of these words from God:
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” – Jeremiah 29:11