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Something You’ll NEVER See in ‘Christianity Today’ magazine: My Facebook Friends’ Answers to This Question: “How to help former evangelicals navigate their way out of despair and towards meaningful action?”

Last updated on: March 12, 2015 at 5:35 pm   by
Something You’ll NEVER See in ‘Christianity Today’ magazine: My Facebook Friends’ Answers to This Question: “How to help former evangelicals navigate their way out of despair and towards meaningful action?” 2015-03-12T17:35:24-06:00

“Find a safe place. Come to understand just how unsafe and destructive evangelicalism is. Whether that safe place is a therapist’s office, a support group, a college classroom (critical thinking courses), a professor’s office hours, a preist’s study, reading a book like yours, Frank…”

I asked my Facebook community to respond to this question:

“How to help former evangelicals navigate their way out of despair and towards meaningful action?” 

Here are their answers… so far: (Are you on my FB page? We have some interesting times!)

    • Glen William Rickerd Find a safe place. Come to understand just how unsafe and destructive evangelicalism is. Whether that safe place is a therapist’s office, a support group, a college classroom (critical thinking courses), a professor’s office hours, a preist’s study, reading a book like yours, Frank… even a quiet hour in the hot tub — seek safety. Healing starts with getting away from exposure to the toxic source.
      Like · Reply · 1 hr
      • Glen William Rickerd 18 months ago, three of us who came out of an evangelical sect founded a private FB group for survivors and escapees from a religious cult. It takes a unanimous agreement for us to invite a person to join. There are now a dozen of us, and we have found it an incredibly healing place. 

        Here are our guidelines:

        This is a group for those of us who have suffered or are in the process of suffering, or simply are engaging in an ongoing crisis of faith. Specifically for those who had childhood exposure to [church name], and / or attended [educational institution].

        It’s a secret group, which means only members can see the group itself, what’s posted in it, and who’s in it. In other words, it’s a very safe place.

        Suggestions for behavior:

        The need in this group is to be sensitive and supportive of every member, no matter where our opinions have developed in regards to both religion and politics. We do not want this to ever become a place where anyone is afraid to be completely open with their opinions/struggles/needs. If someone wants to talk about their realization that they are gay and polyamorous, that they are practicing voodoo, and have a life’s ambition to have a marijuana farm, we want them to feel safe to be completely honest. 

        And if someone wants to talk about their desire to take a vow of celibacy, preach the Gospel to the cannibal islands, and donate all their money to the Republican party, they likewise need to feel safe. Those who want to say “fuck” need to feel safe, and those who want to say “hallelujah” need to be safe. 

        This place is about the people, not their opinions or choices. If someone wants to debate, they need to find another place, because this is a place for support. If someone isn’t seeking to give and receive both vulnerability and support, this probably isn’t the place for them.

        In short: Be ye fucking kind to one another, damn tenderhearted, forgiving all dumbassed recovery ye hearth.
        Like · 1 hr · Edited
      • Frank Schaeffer
        Write a reply…
         
    • Connie Backus-Yoder By remembering that Jesus never said for people to depart from him because of abortion or gayness, but rather because they did not feed the hungry, clothe the naked, visit those in prison, provide shelter to the homeless, and care for widows and orphans and the strangers among us. Did I miss anything? I know I added a couple of things but the principal of generosity is still there because scripture commands we pay attention to those issues.
      Unlike · Reply · 19 · Yesterday at 6:28am · Edited
      • Frank Schaeffer replied · 2 Replies
    • Chris Brown My own difficult journey suggests some people are stuck in fundamentalist evangelicalism because they feel they “owe it” to their parents or others to share those beliefs. Integrity is sometimes tough to hold on to.
      Unlike · Reply · 11 · Yesterday at 6:36am
      • Frank Schaeffer replied · 5 Replies
    • Nicolai Gideon 1. Your questions are valid!
      2. Nothing’s wrong with you because you engaged in evangelicalism. Most of us grew up in it and couldn’t have known any better. And even if you bordered the ship later, you did so because you didn’t know any better. You do now, thank God!
      3. Accept if you will always have a limp, so to speak. It’s better to walk that way than not walk at all!
      Unlike · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 8:16am · Edited
    • Elaine White Love the letter from Katherine…and couldn’t agree more. I’ll be following this closely and want to help any way I can. As you know, Frank, I am in the throes of personal crisis right now, so once things settle, I’ll have more to say. Peace be with you. With love, Elaine
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 6:11am
    • Denise A Romano How about asking them to study logic exhaustively – listing all the important points in the study of logic – and research and list every mistranslation of the bible with footnotes.
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · Yesterday at 9:20am
    • Catharine Mi-Sook Hm, I can only share what helped me. First, believing that my heart is good and beautiful and that it always was. I asked God to help me walk outside the box of evangelical fear, and I started to breathe again when I walked in the woods and touched the trees. Or when I talked to people that I was taught to be afraid of without any agenda except listening, seeing, learning and hopefully sharing some laughs. Or when I listened to Ventura Highway by America for the first time again after years of listening to lyrically uplifting but musically horrendous Christian pop. Painting helped unlock years of stuffed creativity which led to haiku writing which led to daily doodling which led to writing stories. But most of all my three year old son taught me the most. What do his eyes tell me when I’m interacting with him? Do they say that he is loved or are they telling me that he’s scared or sad or unseen? The answer to that sums up the whole though all that I’ve shared here are examples of the process of going back into my heart and realizing that God was in there the whole time, and that the more I love that space – my heart – the more I am able to release what’s in it wherever I am.
      Unlike · Reply · 14 · Yesterday at 7:39am
    • Mike Barden It will take a time of deconstruction, then reconstruction. A lot of soul searching and honesty. The tough part is you don’t know how it will shake out, but trust the process.
      Unlike · Reply · 10 · Yesterday at 6:51am
      • Jana Bussanich Deconstruction of self, others, and God. Finally, a laying down of certainty and a long journey through what I call and experienced as the “dark night of the soul”. It is hard to trust the process. There are times you may only feel certain of not makin…See More
        Like · 2 · 23 hrs · Edited
      • Frank Schaeffer
        Write a reply…
         
    • Kate Abbe The other HUGE help was to listen to my intuition and stop discounting it. I had a dream that directly told me that everything would be alright. I don’t believe it was a deity talking to me. It was my own psyche’s unconscious understanding of newness and self-agency.
      Unlike · Reply · 9 · Yesterday at 7:02am
    • David Reynolds As one of those who fully embraces the evangel, let go. Grieve. Open your heart to a wider vision. If you embrace the path of Jesus, it is wider than you imagined. If you choose another path, the holy one walks with you in joy!
      Unlike · Reply · 7 · Yesterday at 6:38am
    • Linda Jane Sack If you’ve been severely abused and your level of confusion from the psychological and spiritual abuse is keeping you from functioning, finding joy again and having hope, call Larry at this resource center. …See More
      Family Support Services – Wellspring Retreat
      Retreat and support services for recovery from…
      WELLSPRINGRETREAT.ORG
      Unlike · Reply · Remove Preview · 5 · Yesterday at 9:21am
    • Patricia Zaccardo I studies Existentialism in college, many decades ago. I realized that, once you strip away everything . . . career, religious, race, society, laws, etc. . . . you are left with yourself and other people. The very weird thing about this painful and many year journey was that I found a guiding principle: do unto others as you would want them to do unto you. I am not religious and tend towards Buddhism which is not–for me–a religion but a guiding set of principles. A very wise man who spoke with me about problems I was having with other people said . . . “They are doing the best they can this time around.” WOW. This also means that I am doing the best I can this time around and that is when I started to learn to forgive myself for whatever failings I have. So, into this bouillabaisse of should searching (I typed “searing” first . . . LOL), add “You can’t help others if you are running on empty.” Take care of yourself, especially if you are the embodiment of God’s creation. My favorite definition of God is St. Anselm’s: God is that which there is no greater than. I hope my ramblings help.
      Unlike · Reply · 5 · Yesterday at 9:11am
      • 2 Replies
    • Linda Jane Sack Finding a counselor who understands religious abuse is essential. One who will validate your feelings, preferences, perceptions. 

      Even if for a while, see if you can attend a non-evangelical church. Having the structure and support and possibly a goo      …See More
      Unlike · Reply · 5 · Yesterday at 9:08am
    • Bob Greaves Learn to be honest about the numerous subtle fear factors.
      Unlike · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 8:28am
      • 2 Replies
    • Jessica Tinkham I feel like it’s important to let people know that no one has it all figured out. Jesus knew that life was messy, so he gave clear instructions to err on the side of love and compassion for those who need it most. Also, Jesus didn’t come to validate wh…See More
      Unlike · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 6:44am
    • Thomas Robison I find it encouraging that among my clergy colleagues are those who have come out of fundamentalist backgrounds. They often seem to me to have a more keen understanding of grace than I might, having grown up in a theology of grace and Luther’s theology of the cross.
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 9:03am
    • Steve Ryan Introduce them to the Mother of Christ – The Blessed Mother. The great Pope John Paul II often said … “To Christ through Mary”
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 9:00am
    • Jennifer Ould For me, allowing myself to grieve, and finding a good therapist has been invaluable. Growing into and owning my own agency instead of the passive version on “trusting ” and “waiting on” God that I was unintentionally and intentionally taught has been core for me. Finding a solid community in a non-evangelical congregation who value what I can bring from my evangelical roots (it’s a great foundation in so many ways if you can dig yourself out from under it). And friends who’ve made the journey themselves and/or tell me how proud they are of me in the middle of the messiness.
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 8:10am
    • Jim Rogers Telling our stories helps others. I am working on a conversation with my brother. I am writing it into an autobiography. One thing, we have to wait till they are seeking.
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 8:08am
    • Jim Rogers Help with finding community that is bssed in all incompassing love. Learning to understand the nature of god without wrath.
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 8:02am
    • Lenore Chernenko The web, for me, was social as much as “religious”. . . My community was strong. . . I knew by elementary-school-age that I was going to have to “navigate out”, but the journey was difficult! Now, at age 78, I see blue sky . . . but meaningful action was often thwarted due to fear-induced emotional/intellectual paralysis . . .
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 7:41am · Edited
    • Paula Bryder Frank, you spent Thanksgiving Day offering your heart and your support to people in need. That seems to me to be a very good start towards healing from the hatred and evil of the evangelical fundamentalist movement. Simply reaching out a loving hand on a one to one basis makes a difference. I know it did to me last Christmas when you did it, & I love you for it.
      Unlike · Reply · 6 · Yesterday at 7:00am · Edited
    • Iain Strachan I think, really it was “meaningful action” that led me out of evangelicalism! I have been for 17 years a volunteer with the Samaritans organisation – a (primarily) telephone-based crisis line for the suicidal and despairing. One of the things I had noticed many times is that it was always possible to guess if a caller you had was gay, not from the way they spoke, but from the fact that they always took elaborate precautions to avoid referring to the gender of a person they were involved with – using gender neutral pronouns, like “they”, or phrases, like “this particular person”. It nearly always would turn out they were gay and only felt comfortable to reveal so after several minutes to ascertain that I would not judge them. Then one day I decided I really needed to read the testimony of some gay Christians and see how it squared with the bible. I found many of them were better Christians than I was! So all that forced a re-think. Since then I have spoken up for gay people, and have been often quite viciously attacked by evangelicals who accuse me of “straying from the truth”, and in many cases they wantonly misrepresent me.

      But as far as meaningful action is concerned, I always think of the parable of the sheep and the goats in Matthew 25 – and I truly believe that when you reach out to a person who is suffering – whether it be to clothe them, or feed them, or just give them your time and take them seriously, that you are truly meeting Christ ( and that applies to non-believers as well as believers – anyone can encounter God in this way, whether they know it or not).

      I wish I could say I always follow this – but none of us is perfect. But when I pick up that phone, I take a second to think that in meeting “the least of these my children” I am encountering the suffering Christ.
      Like · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 8:02am
    • Kate Abbe What helped me is to consider at much greater depth other possibilities for why the letters of sacred texts came to say what they say. Other than what preachers and apologetic reasons said. Open my mind to other ideas and don’t just keep so attached to what I’ve been handed by believers.
      Like · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 7:00am
    • Glenn Brown I almost was snarky and say “tell them to delete their facebook account!” Seriously though I would say look into Ignatian Spirituality (and I’m not a catholic or a jesuit!) specifically the part about discernment. Hopefully they left evangelicalism because they saw a hint of real life and liberation elsewhere. Ignatius of Loyola teaches us to look for spirits of consolation rather than desolation. To seek out the theology thats life-giving rather than life-condemning. Too often we on the christian left tend to live our lives complaining about the other folks and not offering the real life-giving alternative that we have found.
      Like · Reply · 3 · 19 hrs
    • Linda Johnson Burandt I am following this thread. I’ve been treading in quicksand for years, holding on to a branch (my own mind) to keep me afloat. Looking for someone (myself) to pull me completely out and to be free at last.
      Like · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 9:42am
      • 3 Replies
    • Transtorno de Espiritualidade By teaching them that the scriptures are not holy but man made and they are not inerrant, then they can see the real Jesus. The next step is to show that he never started a religion or opened any type of church or temple… finally by telling that God is inside of us and there’s is nothing we can do to lose or to catch him and that the path is not searching in on the outside but on our inner-selfs. It’s tricky I know.
      Like · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 9:40am
    • Matthew Paul Manotti Give them Franny and Zooey, Chesterton’s Orthodoxy, and Endo’s Silence to read.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 9:21am
    • Patrick J Wilson a recognition that it will take time for ex/post evangelicals to psychologically come to terms with a different understanding god/the world and that this process is normal when people go under significant change in their belief
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 8:43am
    • Shawn F. Nerenberg Two things helped me escape the fundamentalist mindset, and gain a better, perhaps more honest faith. 1: Realizing that God gave me a brain and expected me to use it, and ask questions, even to use critical thinking. 2: All that Stuff Jesus taught (remember him?) about love, forgiveness, mercy, compassion, He meant it, and God may be taking notes. Opening a meeting with prayer, then damning the homeless doesn’t cut the mustard.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 7:56am
    • Ron Manns Wait, until you can begin to truly forgive yourself and those around you. When right and wrong begin to no longer be the point, when judging others begins to feel silly, then go and stand beside those around you.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 7:44am
    • Sara Rose Polen Trust in your own light; regardless of which religion or how you were raised; it is in everyone.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 7:43am
    • Melissa Shew Warner Historical context of particular Bible passages also helps. Deeper study does not always happen in that environment, so sometimes I seek it out and share it.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 7:01am
    • Melissa Shew Warner Show love. In all ways. My experience has been that, when witnessing a loving person who LIVES their faith, people will inquire from where that comes. And then… a dialogue can ensue.
      I have frequent conversations with folks who consider themselves “evangelicals” – we share perspectives and beliefs. Sometimes it is fruitful, sometimes not.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 6:59am
    • Pat Taylor Fuller They need to study the history of how the Bible became the book we have today. Who decided which books were in and which were out and why!
      Unlike · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 7:55am
    • SJ Adams Love all creation and its people as much as you say you love your God. Just a suggestion.
      Unlike · Reply · 4 · Yesterday at 7:11am · Edited
    • Tim Boone Have them read Brian McClaren and Phillip Gully to understand love and Grace and to rethink how ro interpret scripture in a helpful way.

      McClaren ‘s book A New Kind of Christianity is very helpful.
      Like · Reply · 2 · 18 hrs · Edited
    • Beth Beyer Abbott It meant so much to me that I returned to school for a Masters and certificate in spiritual direction. Now it is my privilege to support others on the journey to their True Self.
      Like · Reply · 2 · 23 hrs
    • William Ford It is tough; When you have put your trust in something all of your life and then have it betray you. When one is fired for standing up for what is right because of Christian dogmatism and you are exiled from what you love, and the Heavens are silent, it is nearly impossible to keep going. Sometimes, you just just have to put your shoulder to the grindstone and take it a day at a time.
      Like · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 10:14am
      • 2 Replies
    • Wendy Francisco I think action will be a side result of knowing who God really is, of having a picture of Him that is consistent, nonviolent, loving, forgiving. The despair which we had built up is from years of being told that His love, underneath it all, is conditional rather than authentic. That is enough to undo anyone’s personhood.
      Like · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 10:10am
    • Carrel King I believe the only way out of despair is to go through it. I would encourage anyone leaving something that was so important to them behind to take the time to grieve thoroughly. It is important too, I believe, not to throw the baby Jesus out with the…See More
      Like · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 9:58am
    • Donna Schliebe McPherson Read alternative literature even if you feel like the devil is the author. By trusting in the words of God, ‘I will NEVER leave you or forsake you ‘, you can journey onward knowing that even if you get OFF the Father of Lights will get you back ON. FEAR NOT!
      Like · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 9:41am
    • Shary Kroeker Hauber I found evangelicalism became so political it is no longer a religion but a political party that preaches not God but their opinion from the pulpit. It would be good if they read and followed this advice. 
      http://www.thedailybeast.com/…/dear-evangelicals-you-re…
      Dear Evangelicals: You’re Being Had
      Why are you trying to solve a cultural problem with a political solution? Because the Republican Party is…
      THEDAILYBEAST.COM
      Like · Reply · Remove Preview · 2 · Yesterday at 7:56am
      • 4 Replies · 10 hrs
    • Thomas Faggard Relize you are a Child of God and the Day you wereBorn that thier was No Sin,You were Born in Innocent and a Holy Destinay.Your Mission is to learn to Become Human and Give and Recieve Love and be a Peacemaker and a Healer.The So call Fall is more about Language and Semantics it Happen when you Were Taught “I-It’ to replace The “I-thou that is Part of your DNA Being and Soul.Rascism is Learned.Being Born Again is about Waking Up from being a Zombie and Becoming a Human Being and Embrace your Humanity and Ascention to Divinity.This Body is just Cyrsalis or Cacoon it Carry’s Your Divinity to Ascention.St.Thomas SpreadingEagle,Ghost Dancer.
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · 23 hrs
    • Kimmo Wilska By challenging the notion that the truth to be found in Scripture is in the literal meaning of the words, sentences, and passages, and by saying that it’s OK to evaluate them according to what feels right. 
      Evangelicals and New Atheists share some comm      on ground – in saying that Christians are not Christians if they do not slavishly follow the word as is written, and if they cherry-pick the parts that they think feel good. 
      Everybody cherry-picks – even the most fundamentalist-minded Evangelicals: they even seem to wilfully ignore big chunks of Leviticus, as if the anti-gay stuff were the only relevant part.
      Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 7:13am · Edited
      • Jonathan Massey It would be helpful if all readers of the Bible simply mastered literary analysis. The Bible contains both literal and figurative stuff. Truth (or baloney) can be communicated both literally and figuratively. “Taking the Bible literally” is as much an error as “Taking the Bible metaphorically” is.
        Like · 10 hrs · Edited
      • Frank Schaeffer
        Write a reply…
    • Paul Bergmann Alcohol
      Like · Reply · 1 · 20 hrs
    • Luke Patterson In the song, “Roll Away Your Stone” from Mumford and Sons, the lyric, ‘It’s not the long walk home that will change this heart but the welcome I receive with the restart.’ There is I think a combination of the Lenten journey of repentance and the return of the Prodigal Son here, with support from other commentary I’ve come across. My spirit resonated with this song and especially this line. As a recovering fundamentalist/evangelical myself, I had to learn that guilt wasn’t the point. Guilt and shame are not redemptive. And that the journey is not an end in itself. Just needed to know that love and forgiveness were within reach. And THAT is what began to transform my heart. In the “map and compass” world such as wilderness travel, backpacking, etc, everyone starts off in a direction with a bearing in mind. Start at point A, end at point B. In the evangelical world i was definitely navigating but lost my bearing. I certainly haven’t arrived by any stretch, but I love the possibilities of where the question will lead.
      Like · Reply · 1 · 22 hrs
    • Lynn Derks First, go to God and be honest with Him about where you are and what you’re thinking: “God, I’m frustrated. What I’ve been told about you isn’t working. It looks like you get all the advantages and I get all the punishment…etc.” Then, somewhere in that meeting with God, be willing to let God guide you to the answers you’re seeking: “God, I need YOU to show me where to go. I need YOU to clarify my thinking. No more religion; no more books; no more classes. This is me and You. As far as I’m concerned, this is up to You. If you’re interested in me as an individual and want a relationship with me, You need to get busy and show me where to go and what to do.”
      In my situation, God showed up big-time. I can’t say I heard an audible voice, but I got a message loud and clear about the direction I should take.
      One further note: everyone that is in a conscious relationship with God gets to this crisis point. I say this as an encouragement. Getting to this crisis point gets us to our honest selves. That’s where our relationships with God flourish.
      Like · Reply · 1 · 23 hrs
    • Michael James Redmond The definitive revelation is the Word-made-flesh, Jesus Christ. The Word-made-words is promise & testimony & witness & celebration of a Person, a life, an example. Jesus even warns people about bibliolatry: John 5: 39-40: “You study the Scriptures diligently because you think that in them you have eternal life. These are the very Scriptures that testify about me, yet you refuse to come to me to have life.” In other words, what Christians call “salvation” isn’t conferred by the Bible. All the Bible does is point you in the right direction. What, then, are we to believe; how, then, are we to live our lives? Jesus promised us an indwelling Spirit to be our teacher and guide, personally and corporately. We search within ourselves and we search within a community of faith.
      Like · Reply · 1 · 23 hrs
    • Beth Beyer Abbott My spiritual director / companion was so integral to my healing as I deconstructed and reconstructed my faith journey. You can find a companion through spiritual directors international. Www.sdiworld.org
      Spiritual Directors International
      Looking for your soul compass? Use our online Seek and Find Guide to locate a spiritual director to support your…
      SDIWORLD.ORG
      Like · Reply · Remove Preview · 1 · 23 hrs
    • Carol Hopkins Clayton Do something helpful and meaningful for someone in need – especially someone who doesn’t fit into your personal criteria for being “deserving.” It is only through truly loving others, all others, that we are able to see the good in ourselves.
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · Yesterday at 9:26am
    • Caleb Miller The first step is admitting you have a problem.
      Like · Reply · 1 · Yesterday at 8:23am
    • Barbara Blackburn I would say that the despair comes from putting hope in the wrong place. That is the problem with evangelicalism today. They think they’ve put their hope in Jesus, but ignore what he said and stood for. I learned to put my hope in Jesus and that makes me feel free to explore thought and see that the church tried to put him in a straightjacket too often. Let go and see where he takes you. My change came from deep grief over my child’s death. But, even in the despair, I really feel joy too, because I feel no longer tied down to other peoples’ expectations or misguided ideas about God. I am no longer bound by the Pharasaical letter of the law that evangelicals try to tie on to people. I go with the Spirit and no longer worry if everyone likes it. My hope is not in everyone else. I need real hope in my own despair. I find it in the person of Jesus, apart from the legalism and BS of evangelical thought (that frankly feels like no thought at all).
      Like · Reply · 3 · 23 hrs
    • Lynn Jennings Many times I have helped myself by helping others. I started by volunteering in my community food bank and learned through that journey that when my foot hit that door all judgements had to be left at the threshold. I then was the director for 5 years. Finding something you feel a passion for that gives back puts you in touch with your own humanity and takes you out of the safety zone of the bubble you may be living in. Whether that is your church bubble, your home bubble, etc….I would also add that our food bank was set up with no religious affiliations at all, we purposefully did this because we wanted everyone who came through that door to feel welcome and helped and not beholding in any way. Like most trauma you have to start slow and give yourself time to heal.
      Unlike · Reply · 2 · Yesterday at 9:06am
    • Janel Apps Ramsey Get rid of the legalism and step out in faith. Stop putting everything in boxes. 

      Learn that you have worth and value as a person. Stop giving away who you are to a nameless, shapeless “church” and live the life of the creation you were created to be.
      Like · Reply · 8 hrs
    • Judy Yetter Prenevost I am still in the despair stage, but I try to remind myself that I don’t have to be the one to change anyone else’s mind or convince them how wrong they are. God is more than big enough to change hearts.
      Like · Reply · 10 hrs
    • Jan Jones It may seem simplistic, but start where you are…because wherever you are, you’re ok. If you need help focusing…these have helped me and if you get on their email list, they run 21 Day Meditations that are free. Above all, know you really are loved and we are here https://chopracentermeditation.com/store…
      Meditation Experience • Store
      Are you ready to create the life you’ve always dreamed of? All you can imagine or desire is available to you,…
      CHOPRACENTERMEDITATION.COM|BY STYLERS
      Like · Reply · Remove Preview · 11 hrs
    • Robert Flanagan Spend time in nature, work with your hands….there will be pain, there will be healing, there will be joy.
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · 11 hrs
    • Amanda Gwynne-Farrish Ooops was on messenger and replied on the wrong feed;)
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · 12 hrs
    • Amanda Gwynne-Farrish No don’t feel that way – no worries at all!!! I miss you guys!!
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · 12 hrs
    • Dayne Sherman The key is to leave. Just leave. Become Orthodox, Episcopalian, United Methodist. Move on.
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · 13 hrs
    • Jeff Costa Treat EVERYONE with nothing but love and respect. That should do it.
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · 14 hrs
    • Dennis George Rudolph Frank, what do you mean by “meaningful action”?
      Unlike · Reply · 1 · 14 hrs
    • Daniel Paul Martini Fox Honestly, to me this feels like a trick question. As a former “evangelical” I find myself freed from despair now that I have distanced myself from the church for many years. The complexity that is what we call “reality” and “truth” can not be acquired through messages commanding faith. The big questions will be. The big answers will not be. Concerning meaningful action I offer you this: when you find yourself aiding others as you can do you not feel as if something magical is taking place? There is your answer. Christ’s message of action speaks to the heart, mind, and body. Benefit yourself by benefitting others. A simple act such as holding a door for a stranger holds a magical potential as effect. These acts ripple both outward and inward. I do not have any answers concerning the soul. No one does. But being open to helping others as often as possible has made a huge impact on my being. Empathy, Compassion, and Forgiveness go a very very long way while we ride this question marked ship through space and time.
      Like · Reply · 16 hrs
    • Pam Easterday Do not be in a hurry or demand certainty.
      Like · Reply · 16 hrs
    • John Wallace Prayer
      Like · Reply · 16 hrs
    • David Flowers As you ask your questions about God, determine to reject the fear that often comes with asking. Fear is not “the Holy Spirit,” keeping you from falsehood, but rather your deepest and most broken self, scared to death to grow, to change, to move. This is the exact opposite of true spirituality, which is always moving, always stretching up and outward, always seeking growth, and embracing whatever comes along with it. And always, no matter what, rejecting fear, which is antithetical to life and all that is good. 

      I think evangelicals are often encouraged to understand fear as the voice of the Holy Spirit, there to protect them, and that is one of the most dysfunctional things about evangelicalism. Jesus said if the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness. If in your mind the voice of fear is the voice of God, then fear is what controls your life. 

      So, with “God” on one side in the form of fear, trying to keep us from screwing up, and “God” on the other side in the form of guilt, constantly reminding us that we have screwed up, it appears “God” is responsible for two of the worst things in human life. 

      No understanding of God from this perspective, no matter how well-intentioned, can possibly be anything but dysfunctional, and deeply so. Any reading of Scripture, any understanding of religion, that encourages this view, or supports it, is equally dysfunctional, and can only be propagated by those who are themselves slaves to fear and guilt. That a substantial number of such people go by the title Pastor, Reverend, Teacher, Father, mom, or dad, does not in any way change this fact.
      Like · Reply · 17 hrs · Edited
    • Peter Martin Jazz Excellent Glenn !
      Like · Reply · 19 hrs
    • Peter Martin Jazz We are already here in the body of the true church, the one that stood up to state and religious tyranny. 

      Today organized religion co opted by governance under non profit status has evolved into a springboard for the politically ambitious who speak fear to the flock on behalf of the clergy.

      My bible says, step out of her . . And the world !
      Like · Reply · 19 hrs · Edited
    • Andrew Davis Our mission is to provide educational, charitable, and peer support to current and former religious professionals who no longer hold supernatural beliefs. Our goal is accomplished through a private, invitation only, online peer support community.

      http://clergyproject.org/atheist-nonbeliever-clergyproject/
      Current and Formerly Religious – Atheists – Unbelievers
      The Clergy Project Mission is to provide charitable, and…
      CLERGYPROJECT.ORG
      Like · Reply · Remove Preview · 21 hrs
    • Deborah Ermter I find it helpful to look toward the humanity of Jesus. Part of the reason we get into serious trouble is we get to thinking we should and CAN be ‘above human’. In doing so, we begin to lose our humanity, we reject and can even come to hate being human. If we’re in a stream of Christianity that teaches us to ‘be better than human’ , (which I believe the Evangelical and Charismatic church is sometimes prone to do- each in their own way) we’re actually being taught to reject the humanity of Christ and I believe if we seek to comprehend the beauty of being human, we begin to detox and heal from self loathing. I hope that makes sense, I’m typing on the run. 
      Like · Reply · 21 hrs · Edited
    • Cynthia Williams Deegan Thank you, every one. I read each word.
      Like · Reply · 22 hrs
    • Hayley Karl Photography Follow the question(s) that brought you away from evangelicalism. Why doesn’t evangelicalism resonate with you anymore? Did it ever? Discover who you are as a human searching for the divine. The journey out of despair is in and of itself meaningful action.
      Like · Reply · 22 hrs
    • Caralyn Shantz When a photographer enters a darkroom all they have is the negative. After their work is done and they come into the light they’ve got a work of beauty to show.
      Like · Reply · 22 hrs
    • Paul Shaffer Just be a friend to them. Give them a shoulder to lean on .
      Like · Reply · 22 hrs
    • Adriene Buffington Kathy Silveira Escobar “Faith Shifts”
      Like · Reply · 23 hrs
    • Linda Johnson Burandt Beth what is a certificate in spiritual direction. Very interesting.

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