The first measurable winter precipitation of the season rolled through town last Monday night, on the heels of sixty-five degree temperatures on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I found out on Weather.com that this mediocre, unimpressive two-inches-of-icy-crap-producing storm was given the name Winter Storm Goliath. I really hate that every winter system that produces a snowflake gets its own special name, but if weโre going Biblical with storm names this winter, I have some suggestions. Nebuchadnezzar. Zerubbabel. Mephibosheth. Habakkuk. Melchizedek. Ahasuerus. Or we could go short with something like Eli or Ham. If we have a winter like last year and run out of names, Iโve got some good New Testament ones as well.
If at this time in 2017 Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, or Ben Carson is President of the United States, Jeanne and I will be wishing everyone Happy New Year from Canada.
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At an after-Christmas, multiple birthday party at Jeanneโs brotherโs house on Long Island this week, there were three generations of her family present (hard to believe that we are part of the oldest generation). This included six kids representing the newest generationโI donโt recall my cousins, brother, and me being that cute and precocious when we were in single digits of age. Or at least our parents didnโt act as if we were.
Whatโs with the inflatable snowmen, reindeer, and Santa Clauses that seem to populate more and more yards every holiday season? I donโt like them. At least eighty percent of the time they are not inflated and look like a bunch of large and colorful used condoms. Reallyโthink about it.
While writing one of the days before Christmas I put Handelโs Messiah on Spotify for my listening pleasure. I had a classic WTF? moment shortly afterwards until I realized that I had forgotten to turn โshuffleโ off. โThe Trumpet Shall Soundโ followed by โThere Were Shepherds Abiding in the Fieldโ and the โHallelujah Chorusโ was as disorienting as scrambling the verses of the Twenty-Third Psalm would be. Didnโt quite work.
Good news on the broken ankle frontโit has healed well and I donโt need to see the orthopedist again. I asked him if there was anything I should still avoid doing; his advice sounded like a Henny Youngman joke. โIf you do something and your ankle hurts, stop doing it.โ
From the Un-Fucking-Believable file: I read on Facebook this week that certain conservative elements are interpreting House Speaker Paul Ryanโs new beard as a sign that he is soft on Islam and perhaps moving toward conversion himself. Iโm not making this up.
Did Paul Ryan GROW A BEARD to show SYMPATHY with the MUSLIMS?!?!
Beards are important, thoughโjust ask fans of the 2013 World Series Champion Boston Red Sox. I noticed the other day that one sharp dividing line between my side of the philosophy department wars and the other, dark side is that the males on my side all have beards and the guys on the other side are, with one exception, beardless. By the way, thereโs only one woman out of twenty-one philosophers in the departmentโcertainly a huge part of our problems. I never thought I would have a moment of solidarity with Paul Ryan, but as my sister-in-law from Brooklyn likes to say, โwhat are you gonna do?โ
A friend of ours who is going through major life changes is trying to get Jeanne and me to give his dachshund a home. We have two dachshunds and a Boston Terrier already who all compete vigorously for Jeanneโs attentionโadding a fourthย Jeanne-loving canine into the mix does not make sense. But something tells me weโre going to do it (Lily likes me too, so maybe I can co-opt her). Stay tuned.
Hereโs hoping that 2016 delivers a President that rational people from all sides can live with, a country that acts more like Canada, another Super Bowl for the Patriots, a deep NCAA tournament run for Friars basketball, a repeat national championship for the Friars hockey team, a publisher for my new book, my book rocketing to the top of the NY Times non-fiction list, the miracle of sanity and collegiality for my philosophy department, no snow storms stronger than Goliath, a Red Sox return to the top, and the keys to a new car under everyoneโs seat. Is that too much? I donโt careโHappy New Year to all!