For Those Considering Leaving the Church

For Those Considering Leaving the Church 2017-08-23T15:11:06-04:00

You might say that, in this case, it basically means putting up with somebody, acknowledging their differences enough to respect them without really seeing how God’s grace works in their lives. I might “tolerate” a person whose hobbies are (to me) silly, but I’d never actually see how they illuminate that person’s life or, in some serious sense, are that person’s vocation, a source of God’s grace. To take a non-religious example, maybe I think Coldplay is a bad band. Maybe my friend likes Coldplay. Tolerance would be putting up with his liking Coldplay without making any attempt to see the role that it actually plays in his life, and, from there, to discern what that grace actually manifests (it’s a hokey example, but whatever).

This is, I think, how many parishioners relate to each other when they relate at all. They either criticize (disguising such criticism in claims of love, though the issues at hand are often non-dogmatic, more truly personal) their fellow or accept him and make that the end of the question. Communities are not built this way; tolerance does not create meaningful connections (even if, in a sense, it is a necessary step on the way to love). What are we as Christians called to do?

Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God. Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love. In this way the love of God was revealed to us: God sent his only Son into the world so that we might have life through him. In this is love: not that we have loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as expiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. Yet, if we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us. (1 John 4:7-12)

You have heard that it was said to your ancestors,You shall not kill; and whoever kills will be liable to judgment. But I say to you, whoever is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment, and whoever says to his brother, “Raqa,” will be answerable to the Sanhedrin, and whoever says, “You fool,” will be liable to fiery Gehenna. Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there recall that your brother has anything against you, leave your gift there at the altar, go first and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Settle with your opponent quickly while on the way to court with him. Otherwise your opponent will hand you over to the judge, and the judge will hand you over to the guard, and you will be thrown into prison. Amen, I say to you, you will not be released until you have paid the last penny. You have heard that it was said, “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.” But I say to you, offer no resistance to one who is evil. When someone strikes you on [your] right cheek, turn the other one to him as well. If anyone wants to go to law with you over your tunic, hand him your cloak as well. Should anyone press you into service for one mile, go with him for two miles. Give to the one who asks of you, and do not turn your back on one who wants to borrow. You have heard that it was said, “You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.” But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your heavenly Father, for he makes his sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what recompense will you have? Do not the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brothers only, what is unusual about that? Do not the pagans do the same? So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:22-26; 38-48)


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