The Secret of How to Be a Man

The Secret of How to Be a Man July 10, 2018

How to be a man. Google “How to be a man” and you will get a bunch of information. Some good and some not so good. Everything from articles from “The Art of Manliness” to Advice from celebrities such as Kareem Abdul Jabar. Even Wikihow has an article called How to Be a Man (with Pictures) – wikiHow.

Here at Manly Training Ministries we are seeking to answer this question once and for all. Biblically! But one thing is for sure, it is going to require discipline! 

Oh no! I did it! Used the D word…. discipline! Almost no one uses the D word today! Almost no one that is except those who have mastered their talents and are great at what they do. If you want to become a godly man, a man who is living his manhood according to how God designed it, it will require discipline for sure!


Discipline is the difference between what you want now and what you want most.     

Author Unknown

If we don’t discipline ourselves, the world will do it for us.     

William Feather

Discipline is the refining fire by which talent becomes ability.

Roy L. Smith

Discipline is Important to be a Man

Discipline is a word that you hardly hear today. It’s almost a “bad word”. We have stopped using the word discipline. Discipline is almost non-existent in most aspects of our lives. We don’t even speak the word anymore, at least not like we used to. You still heard the word discipline in some circles, such as sports, especially when it comes to Olympians. But in most of our culture it has all but disappeared.

As Christian men, we must understand that discipline is necessary for us to become the men that God created us to be.

Biblical Discipline

Let’s first take a look at the word discipline. The word “discipline” is used throughout the Bible. Thirty six times it is used in the New American Standard version of the Bible. Many of the Proverbs speak of discipline. Verses such as:

“My son, do not reject the discipline of the LORD Or loathe His reproof, For whom the LORD loves He reproves, Even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights.” Proverbs 3:11-12 (NASV)

Proverbs chapter twelve says:

“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, But he who hates reproof is stupid.” Proverbs 12:1 (NASV)

And Proverbs chapter thirteen says:

“Poverty and shame will come to him who neglects discipline, But he who regards reproof will be honored.” Proverbs 13:18 (NASV)

In the New Testament Paul instructs Timothy to,

“Discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness.” 1st Timothy 4:7 (NASV)

This last verse, I Timothy 4:7 will be our focal point for this series. If you have not done so already, I would encourage you to read a book by R. Kent Hughes called “Disciplines of a Godly Man”. As followers of Jesus Christ, we must look at discipline for the purpose of godliness as a way of life. So let us begin by understanding what discipline is.

Discipline is Drudgery

First of all, we must understand that discipline is drudgery unless you have a vision or direction.

How to be a man
Guitar Player

There was once a six year old boy named Kevin who was sitting one afternoon at guitar lessons. He could hear that outside his window were other boys laughing and running and playing baseball. The boys outside his window were having loads of fun. But not Kevin. He was practicing chords and melodies on his guitar. For Kevin, his guitar lessons were drudgery. Suddenly, an angel came and transported Kevin to Carnegie Hall where a guitar virtuoso is giving a concert. Kevin was amazed how the musician was able to play the guitar with fluidity and grace. Kevin got very excited and enthralled by the concert. As Kevin watched in amazement the guitar virtuoso, the angel asked him, “Do you know who that man is?” “No”, exclaimed Kevin, “But is is fantastic.” The angel told Kevin, “Kevin that musician is you – years from now.” The next thing you know Kevin is sitting back at his guitar lesson. The other boys are still outside playing baseball – but something has changed. Kevin now has a vision. He now has a direction. He now has a goal.

Proverbs chapter twenty nine and verse eighteen says:

“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” Proverbs 29:18 (KJV)

Many men don’t catch the vision of discipline because we think of it a drudgery! Nevertheless, we must never forget that discipline is the foundation of discipleship. If we catch the vision for discipline, we will become the men that God created us to be.

The Best of the Best

Discipline is how the best of the best become what they are. Michael Jordan didn’t wake up one day as one of the best Basketball players of all time. He practiced for hours every day. It took discipline. Sergey Krylov didn’t one day pick up the violin and became the world’s best violinist. It took hours of painful practice to achieve that. It took discipline.

Without discipline, Ernest Hemingway would not have become the author he was. He would spend hours every day writing and rewriting each paragraph of his books until they were just “perfect”. It’s well known that Hemingway rewrote his conclusion to “Farewell to Arms” seventeen times in an effort to get it just right!

Without discipline, Michelangelo and Leonardo da Vinci would not have created the masterpieces we now admire and awe over. Did you know that Leonardo da Vinci on one occasion drew one thousand hands! It’s no wonder we admire the anatomical perfection of his works!

Godliness Does Not Just Happen

Just like these great men disciplined themselves, we need discipline to become godly men. It doesn’t just happen. You and I are not going to wake up one day and look at ourselves in the mirror and realize we became godly men over night. That is just not going to happen! We need to discipline ourselves and encourage each other as we spend hour after hour training ourselves in godly disciplines.

I want to take an in depth look at what it takes to become the man that God created us to be. We must study what it takes to become a Godly Man.

Take some time and answer these questions:

1.-  Who is your favorite athlete of all times?

2.- How did this athlete become so good at what he did or does?

3.- Have you heard the expression “blood, sweat and tears” and what does that mean to you?

4.- Have you honestly shed any blood, sweat and tears to become the best christian man (husband or father) you can be?

5.- Will you commit to disciplining your life so that you will become a godly man?

6. What are you willing to do to become the man that God created you to be?


My Father Was, So I Am

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