Only One Way to Survive – The Ultimate Guide to the Perfect Family

Only One Way to Survive – The Ultimate Guide to the Perfect Family 2018-08-06T10:54:58-05:00

over to the right, his neck became rigid and he had to look over his left shoulder a bit. His right arm curled in and up and his index finger almost touched his elbow. His spine warped to look something like a big, old roller coaster and it caused his torso to lie sideways instead of straight up and down like a normal person. My Father’s walk became slow, awkward, and deliberate. He had to almost drag his left foot as he used his deformed right arm to balance his gait.

I hated to be seen with him. Everyone stared. They seemed to pity me. I knew he must have done something really bad to have God hate him that much.

Ungrateful Teenager

By the time I was seventeen, I was blaming all my problems on my father. I didn’t have the right boyfriends because of him and I didn’t drive the right car because of him. I wasn’t pretty enough because of him, I didn’t have the right jobs because of him and I wasn’t happy because of him.

Anything that was wrong with me, or my life, was because of him. If my father had been good-looking, like James’ father, or successful like Paul’s father, worldly like Terry’s father, I would be perfect! I knew that for sure.

The night of my senior prom came, and Father had to place one more nail in my coffin; he had volunteered to be one of the chaperones at the dance. My heart just sank when he told me. I stormed into my room, slammed the door, threw myself on the bed, and cried.

The Pillow

“Three more weeks and I’ll be out of here!” I screamed into my pillow. “Three more weeks and I will have graduated and be moving away to college.” I sat up and took a deep breath. “God, please make my father go away and leave me alone. He keeps sticking his big nose in everything I do. Just make him disappear, so that I can have a good time at the dance.”

I got dressed, my date picked me up, and we went to the prom. Father followed in his car behind us. When we arrived, Father seemed to vanish into the pink chiffon drapes that hung everywhere in the auditorium. I thanked God that he had heard my prayer. At least now I could have some fun.

Midway through the dance, Father came out from behind the drapes and decided to embarrass me again. He started dancing with my girlfriends. One by one, he took their hand and led them to the dance floor. He then clumsily moved them in circles as the band played. Now I tried to vanish in the drapes.

Say What!?

After Jane had danced with him, she headed my way.

“Oh no!” I thought “She’s going to tell me he stomped on her foot or something.”

“Grace,” she called, “you have the greatest father.” My face fell. “What?”

She smiled at me and grabbed my shoulders. “Your


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