When you (God) open your hand, they are satisfied with good things
I should have listened to him. Him being my husband. It felt like an ah-hah moment that arrived a little too late for much damage control to take place. And yet, isn’t our God the one who promises to restore the years the locusts have eaten? He sure is and I’m sure my family is thankful for that promise.
Many years ago, I started writing books for single moms not because I’ve ever been a single parent, but because two of my closest friends almost simultaneously went through unwanted divorces of their own. When they became single parents, I began telling their stories. After watching my two friends become both mom and dad to their children, nothing seemed harder to me than parenting solo.
Learn To Listen To Wise Counsel
So why did I struggle so mightily against listening to my spouse’s counsel regarding one of our children? To this day, I’m not quite sure. If I’m honest, I suppose I thought I had a better take on the situation because I was a woman overflowing with female emotions whereas my husband was all manly business. The truth is, I wasn’t seeing the whole picture and my inability (and unwillingness) to budge from my stance cost my daughter in a big way.
How does a mom spell regret? In big, bold, flashing neon letters that never stop blinking across this mother’s mind, that’s how. If only…I had listened. If only…I had trusted another’s voice other than my own. If only…I had taken more time to pray. If only…I wasn’t so impatient to fix a problem. My “if onlys” were adding up in part because I hadn’t taken time to truly pay attention.
God Gives Wisdom To Those Who Ask
Pay attention to what my spouse was observing. Pay attention to the signs that my daughter was making poor decisions. Pay attention to what the Lord was trying to tell me…that all my good intentions don’t amount to much (or avail much), if I’m not hearing what He (the Lord) is trying to tell me. And more often than not, He (God) uses those closest to me to direct me. My husband. My kids. My parents. My friends.
Regret is the definitive thief. It robs us of our peace today. It steals our hope for tomorrow. Everyone has regrets. Be those regrets of the personal or professional variety, we all make mistakes and with our blunders come all sorts of repercussions.
Humility Is Always A Great Instructor
It’s true enough that when we have a fallout with someone, feelings are hurt and relational repair work has to be done. When we fail at work, again some repair duty must be had. But often we forget that there’s another type of regret-worthy mistake we neglect to consider.
When we stop listening to the people in our lives who know us better than we know ourselves, there’s trouble a brewing. When we fail to heed the advice of those who see the situation from every angle while we only see it from our side, there’s going to be some heartache a happening. When we rush into a difficult situation without first stopping to pray and ask for God’s wisdom, there’s going to be some messy untangling to do.
It just makes sense. Before we leap into the fire (even when we have the best motives possible), we should take on the fireman’s motto of stop, drop, roll. Stop – to get all the facts. Drop – to our knees in prayer. Roll – gently into the situation covered in gentleness and grace. If we can master those three steps…we can alleviate a good portion of the regret we’d experience otherwise. The best part of making mistakes? They can make us better people as we start paying attention to what we did wrong and then learn from it. And transforming something painful into something beautiful? That’s a good thing too.
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