why i never talk with a fundamentalist

why i never talk with a fundamentalist August 30, 2013

bible bunker cartoon by nakedpastor david hayward

Actually, I do talk with fundamentalists. But always, at some point, they start sounding biblical, and then I know I’ve lost them. You know the feeling. It’s like you’re talking with a person when all of a sudden they start sounding like a book. So, it’s not that I don’t talk with a fundamentalist. It’s that I’m actually talking with a bible that’s taken possession of a human body and its brain.

It is a defense tactic, a bunker position, a fearful guard.

I used to have a fundamentalist mindset. I remember doing exercises where the only answer I could give to questions were bible verses. The one who could do this the longest won. Me. I won. It is based on Jesus being tempted in the wilderness where Satan challenges him and each time Jesus corrects him with a scripture. This is how one fights the enemy. With scripture.

It’s very frustrating. When the conversation is between human beings, even if we disagree, at least there’s hope of mutual understanding. But when one resorts to quoting scripture, that’s when I bail. It’s over. Sometimes, I kid you not, I think I’m talking to a troll or some kind of ingenious Biblical Answer Generator. You know what’s coming out of that cannon? You guessed it. Bibles!

If we could all just dissemble our biblical guard and disarm our scriptural cannons perhaps real conversation could take place.

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