Observing and reflecting on Meghan, Duchess of Sussex’s continued vilification inspires me to interrogate a certain demographic’s obsession with Black anger and Black humility.
White supremacy pushes people of color to fight to be seen as the model minority. Well-behaved Black people are often the most appreciated.
Docile and demure Black people are often deemed the best-behaved. However, speaking only when spoken to doesn’t even prevent us from making people uneasy.
RBF — Resting Black face — intimidates many of them. Many times, a tone, which a Black person feels is respectful, can be declared rude and aggressive. Silent responses to obnoxious behavior often leave Black people labeled the problematic one.
People, who’ve never left their small towns, love sprinkling Chicago throughout conversations. Doing so has nothing to do with loving the Cubs or deep-dish pizza. Chicago is code for colored. (This biracial gay social justice minister, theologian, and writer identifies as Black, just so we’re clear.)
It’s their lame attempt to generalize about an entire race. This faith-based gun violence prevention activist doesn’t condone the killing and have been working to find solutions.
Meanwhile, the hypocrisy of those judging some Chicagoans’ violent behavior would be laughable if it weren’t so horrendous. Anger at changing demographics has fueled their obsession with and participation in violence.
White supremacists stormed Charlottesville to remind everyone not white and straight that no one would replace some of the original illegal immigrants’ descendants. No, there weren’t good people on both sides.
No longer having a white supremacist sympathizer, at best, and a white sympathizer, at worst, fueled white-hot anger. That anger inspired racially motivated massacres and an insurrection.
Not surprisingly, anger from certain white circles is always justified. Despite being labeled the “liberal” media, the Fourth Estate — beginning with the Tea Party — painted the false narrative that a certain demographic was forgotten and ignored by Americans.
We were encouraged to walk in their shoes. However, some of this certain demographic’s view is that allowing marginalized and oppressed people finally be seen and heard means straight white people are being marginalized and oppressed.
Meanwhile, Black people not engaged in gun violence, for example, are told to act more like the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. when we call out oppression and racism in the form of Black Lives Matter protests. We’re, ironically (falsely), condemned for looting and burning.
The same people decrying looting and burning want to “take back” an America that rose from the ashes of looted and burned Native American land.
They’re the same people cross this nation who’ve benefitted from looting, burning, and destroying Black neighborhoods to pave the way for gentrification.
But let’s be clear, liberal cities have engaged in this behavior. Central Park was first a successful Black neighborhood. And never forget that his nation’s wealth was built on the backs of enslaved Africans.
So, Black people have a right to be angry. But remnants of slavery remain. If some Americans had their druthers, Black people would still be uttering, “Yes, massa” and “No massa.”
Being a profile in Black humility — to the point of humiliation — is an unspoken expectation. Confidence isn’t allowed.
Meghan, Duchess of Sussex’s refusal to endlessly wallow in gratitude got her labeled ungrateful. Her identity as a Black woman has left her labeled unclean, no matter how her detractors deny it.
The Duchess has clearly rejected those labels. White supremacy declares those not white and straight must quietly and humbly accept all declarations and judgments made about them.
Venom from snakes everywhere continues flowing supposedly because the Duchess isn’t humble enough and didn’t accept how she’s been treated. Knowing her self-worth has been conflated to mean being angry and lacking humility.
Another Royal Family member refusing to accept accountability or even be questioned is actual evidence of lacking humility.
The British media and the Royal Family weaponized Black anger and humility to deflect, in part, from that family member’s poor choices. The Duchess was expected to stay silent about being thrown under the bus.
Speaking out has been written off as the rants of an ungrateful and angry Black woman. A common theme of the Duchess of Sussex detractors flocking to social media has been the Oprah Winfrey interview. They can only point to those comments since the investigation into her bullying yielded nothing.
An H-list celebrity and a flock of relatively unknown white women have congregated on TikTok to pass judgment on the Duchess. However, the H-list celebrity’s claim about the Duchess’ alleged poor business acumen is laughable.
They’re giving mistress of the Big House vibes. None of these women are exhibiting the demure and humble behavior they expect of the Duchess. It’s hypocrisy for me.
Despite patriarchy, no woman should be expected to be calm and humble unless they choose to do so. Those women just might agree. But they seem to be the Duchess shouldn’t be afforded that level of agency.
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