I'm essiantially a gnostic, at heart, no matter what I profess with my lips. I basically carry on thinking that the body and the spirit go together, that matter is not evil–am I identifying the right heresy?–but when it comes down to my actual frame of mind and actual living in the world, I keep banging into the fact that I have The Wrong Idea, that I either value matter and stuff and my own body either too little or... Read more
It's beginning to feel a lot like Panic and that means facing down the dreaded Day of Painting. Long ago, in the foolish way that young mothers have, thinking that they should do crafts with their children and take them to the library and stuff, around Christmas time, I stripped down Elphine and Alouicious and put them in front of a lot of little wooden objects with some paint. They lathered it everywhere and had a brilliant time and then... Read more
Day Thirty-Seven II Kings 5:2 Now the Syrians on one of their raids had carried off a little girl from the land of Israel, and she worked in the service of Naaman's wife. You wake up one morning to find that your leprous but mighty husband has acquired some new help for you. You gather yourself together and face down a battered broken picture, a little girl wrenched from her home and family, swept away in the political and social... Read more
I happened to read a very interesting article floating around facebook last week about the parents of three little boys who just suddenly had enough and canceled Christmas. As we were in the middle of a school day, I took the opportunity to read it out to the children, causing a stunned horror to descend over the gathered throng, which is what all my children in one room feels like. And then I sent it to Matt. “It’s such a... Read more
The tepid anemic sun is trying to beat it's way past a thick layer of cloud. That means it's Monday and me struggling along trying to catch up with the inexorable and relentless march of time. Is that redundant? Sorry. Amongst all the lists and bits of paper I'm also trying work up learning notes from last week. Every time I sit down to really focus on them I, get this, am interrupted. It might end up being a whole... Read more
One I'm torn between trying to write and feeling guilty for not wanting to watch the wretched golden and pink sunrise. God is surely mocking me. I should never be awake to see the sunrise, but he fixed that with winter. And it is displayed at my window right at eye line just at the moment I think I might be awake enough to write so that I feel bad if I don't look at it. And also, I can... Read more
Just got through that horribly tragic and difficult time of rebellion in Numbers. God moves people from Sinai, from the giving of the law, from the organizing of the camp, from the forming of the people into His own possession, to the edge of the promised land. It appears to be orderly and good. But on the way trouble brews. Sweeping dark music covers over the steps of the people as they journey in stages. At one stop Miriam and... Read more
I haven't really been paying attention, because, well, I can't remember why, but there's been a lot of chat about home keeping and the domestic arts on some of the corners of the internet–Kyra has nice links and nice thoughts about it, and I'm sure if you asked her she could explain it all to me, I mean you–and as the conversation has raged on, and I shouldn't enter in because I really haven't been paying attention, is it possible... Read more
It’s Advent. Yay! I know you are all super happy, as I am, and not stressed at all. Yesterday I sat in my comfy beautiful new desk chair, in which, when I sit down, my feet touch the floor and my back doesn’t develop a slow irritating ache, and rewrote all my lists. Earlier I had carefully poured tea over the originals and so it was either rewrite them or feel out of control for the next four weeks. So,... Read more
Here I lie, continuing in my post thanksgiving stupor. It is raining and the snow is slipping away, mercifully. The children are fractious and sad. Marigold just came bounding in to ask if it is Christmas. No, poor child. It's just Monday. Then she wanted to know what is for breakfast. “I poured cornflakes,” said Matt, “they each have a bowl of cornflakes and a cookie.” “!?” I said. “I was worried about them having enough sugar” he said, “and... Read more
Preventing Grace
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