Last column we discussed taking back your power. We continue in that vein on this very important subject.
Don’t give your power away! Things only have the power over you that you give them. We all have the power to do what we need to do. Often, we think we don’t but that isn’t true. The Bible says let the weak say they are strong (Joel 3:10). Are you going to let life beat you down? Are you going to let someone tell you that you are nothing, that you’re weak and a failure? Or are you going to do something about it? The first thing you have got to do is believe in yourself and take your power back. Don’t put it off! Declare who you are TODAY! Decree it! Say it out loud with your mouth, yes, that same mouth you have been putting yourself down with. Declare who you are and then don’t let ANYBODY tell you different. Don’t lower yourself to the level of people who say you are nothing and nobody. Make people appreciate you. You don’t have to be a narcissist but have confidence in yourself and in the God who says you are strong. “Respect yourself, if you don’t respect yourself ain’t nobody gonna give a hoot” (Aretha Franklin). You have to respect you. You have to believe in yourself. You have got to take your power back. You have got to say that from here forward this situation is not going to affect me like it has in the past. I’m better than this. I deserve better than this. I’m going to do what I have to do to make my world conform to who I know that I really am. Feel the wind beneath your wings, feel yourself about to fly. Cast off the weights and evaluate what you need to get rid of. “When the odds are against you, you just gotta get downright bulldog mean. (Outlaw Josey Wales). You cannot help everybody else but you can help yourself. When it comes right down to it you can only change yourself, not someone else.
What about relationships? In the first place, a relationship you are in should never be a fixer-upper. Cars and houses can be fixer-uppers but not relationships. Bad relationships will drain you because one of you is going to be taking and one of you is going to be giving and the time will come when the giver has no more to give. A relationship should always be a partnership with both giving equally as possible. True love is not performance-based.
It is up to you to build yourself up and you need to figure out what it’s going to take to do that. You have to educate yourself like reading this column is doing. Say what is actually true about you not what keeps you down. Confess it daily until you actually do believe it. Words are important. Watch what you say. The Bible says the power of life and death is in the tongue (Proverbs 18:21). Your words become your thoughts and your thoughts become actions. Realize how powerful your words and thoughts are. Don’t be a slave to anybody. Don’t be a slave to the way you thought in the past that kept you down.
Fear is a power drain. Make fear your slave, not your master. Don’t let fear use you, you must use it. Let it drive you to be strong and to be a warrior. Worry and fear create imaginary enemies. You must constantly evaluate if your fears are even founded. Believe in yourself. Identify the true enemies and figure out what you have to do to defeat those enemies. Stop procrastinating. Every time you procrastinate you give your power away to not getting something done that needs doing. But every time you accomplish something, no matter how small, it empowers you.
Never stop learning. Constantly build yourself up. Maybe even sit down and list all the things you are good at. List your skills. Maybe there is something you can even capitalize on and make money at.
Constantly work toward being afraid of nothing. You may never totally achieve that but every step toward it will make you more powerful. The Samurai and the Kamikaze feared nothing. The Samurai philosophy was to embrace death and treat death like their constant companion. That is why they were such formidable foes. How can you defeat an enemy that is unafraid to die? Ultimately that is the way you should be. The fact is we all have an expiration date. We all are going to die but there is no need to die while we are still living. Marcus Aurelius said, “It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.” Tecumseh said, “So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Show respect to all people and grovel to none. When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.” And Christians should certainly not fear death for it is just a crossing over into eternal life. “O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?” (1 Corinthians 15:55).
We all have real things we have to deal with, difficult things, I am in no way belittling any situation you are in. But we do have to deal with what life is handing us. There is no way around it. The question is how are you going to handle it? Are you going to lay down and die or are you going to fight and overcome? Be a survivor and overcomer. Most of the things in life keep us down because we give them power over us. It is largely about perception. Will it be difficult? Probably so, but don’t compare yourself to others or let people say who you are. Get toxic people out of your life. Get the training or education you need to get that job or career that you want. One mistake people make is looking at too big of a picture and it seems impossible. Break your goals down into smaller achievable goals that will be stair steps to get where you ultimately want to be. Do what you can. Do you want to write a book? Write something shorter like a blog. That’s what I do. I often accumulate enough blogs and short stories to put together into a book. You may even decide as you do little things that maybe that wasn’t what you even wanted. If that’s the case you move on to something else. Just move in a positive direction. Move forward. Failures along the way are just stepping stones. Thomas Edison said, “I didn’t fail one thousand times I achieved one thousand ways not to do something.” In other words, he learned from it and kept moving forward. Set some standards. Have a creed. Have a line you won’t cross.
Don’t let people drag you into a situation you will regret. Strive for the long run, not the home run. Evaluate how much of your time you spend that is negatively affecting you. What are your time wasters? We are the sum of the choices we make in life whether we want to admit it or not. You don’t know what the future holds but you do have power over the present moment. This present moment is all you have control over. TAKE BACK YOUR POWER!
I invite you to learn more on dealing with life’s hardships and not letting your circumstances overcome you in my powerful new book YOU ARE THE STORM!
Benjamin Raven Pressley is a prolific writer and ordained minister and has authored many books and blogs. He is an author, artist, Bible teacher and philosopher. His Cherokee heritage and his knowledge of living in harmony with the planet and God are evident throughout everything he writes. Raven welcomes your questions, input, and visits to his website at WalkingSpiritually.com.
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