The 49ers: The Lord’s Team

The 49ers: The Lord’s Team February 8, 2024

The 49ers: The Lord’s Team

**The following is satire, and the arguments contained within should not be taken seriously**

The Challenge

What is the most Christian football team? Some have said, “the Saints.” Others have responded with “Manchester City.” And still others respond with, “What? What are you even talking about? One team cannot be more ‘Christian’ than another!”

But all of these people are, of course, wrong. Just because a team is named the ‘Saints’ does not mean the players, coach, or fans live up to those ideals. And Manchester City is a Soccer team, not a football team. For those who think this a silly question, that doesn’t matter: it does because we Christians need to know who we should root for, especially for the Super Bowl.

This is a problem that theologians, pastors, and people from all walks of life have struggled to answer. Compound that with the fact that the answer is fluid. One year, it might be one team and another year, it could be another.

However, do not fret! I have the answer: the San Francisco 49ers.

A Literal Christian

There can be discussion about who the best player on the 49ers is. But one person who is always in the conversation is Christian McCaffrey. His name is Christian. So, from a literal standpoint, the 49ers is the most Christian football team because we have the best player named Christian on it.

And he is arguably the best running back in football now and one of the best ever. He won Offensive Player of the Year and is a finalist for another prestigious award.

MVPs: Most Vehement Pray-ers

This year, two players from the San Francisco 49ers are finalists for the MVP award in the NFL. Both of these men have been outspoken as Christians. Both men mentioned that their faith is their anchor.

This is, on its own, not entirely unique. Sports history is filled with people crediting God for their success, and even now, there is a good chance that the person who scores a touchdown will point to the sky.

The difference with these men is that they do not seem to seek the limelight. They are exceptional players, so the attention has naturally been on them. Instead, publicly, they credit their success to God and to others. They always credit the team, the coach, and God. This is unique in a time when all players seem to strive for more fame and attention.

These men publicly put God first, even having quick responses when asked what verses in the Bible they hold on to.

The Faithful

What is the best way to describe your fans? Raider Nation? Bills Mafia? Cheeseheads? How about calling your fans the Faithful?

Calling ourselves the faithful is with respect to the team. We are faithful to the 49ers even when they are not performing well, and we are not fair-weather fans. But, even so, it does imply higher ideals. It also shows us the characteristics we 49ers fans want to be associated with.

We are not mafia or cheeseheads. No, we are faithful.

Root for the 49ers

So this Sunday, don’t be a part of Chiefs Kingdom. Be part of the Faithful and root for the team that has players who are part of the Kingdom of Heaven. And if you become a part of the Faithful now and for years to come, then congratulations. You have not chosen to root for ‘America’s Team’ but have chosen a better team: the Lord’s Team.

Go 49ers!

**This article is satire and is not to be taken seriously**

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