Christian Punchlines

Christian Punchlines August 25, 2022

Growing up Mormon, I always found great punchlines performed by the authorities of my church. The funny thing is, they didn’t mean it to be a punchline. They were dead serious. That looks to be the way in how Christian’s produce comedy: accidentally.

Look, I am not trying to say everything that has to do with a Jesus community is absurd and hilarious. It’s not. There are many beautiful things that happen within those settings that have helped me become a more peaceful and healthy human being. I am grateful!

But sometimes, it seems like Christians don’t even have to try, and they become a punchline. We all do sometimes, right? Since I considered myself part of the Christian fold, I have to point it out more pungently (sue me). What am I referring to? Well, come along and let’s go on this fantastic ride as we discover Christianity’s punchlines at their finest…

From Republican Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene,

“We need to be the party of nationalism and I’m a Christian, and I say it proudly, we should be Christian nationalists”

Say what?! This was a joke, right? This is the type of stuff you see on a Saturday Night Live political sketch! It’s a sad and terrifying statement but its funny in how Greene was dead serious. This is the pattern of Christian punchlines: seriously hysterical.

It so in lines with what Jesus was about, right? He was a Christian nationalist through and through…I mean he was so much so that his nation crucified him (see the irony?). These kind of beliefs and statements do nothing but hurt the loving cause of Jesus, in my opinion.

The Christian right isn’t the only one spitting out accidental comedic fire. Let’s see what our progressive Christians are saying:

“I would rather get an abortion than have a Brown child who ends up being adopted by white evangelicals.

It is not a kindness to children of the global majority to give them to people who’ll traumatize them with self-ancestral hatred.

An abortion is an act of love.”, Jo Luehmann

Doesn’t this make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? According to this social media post, all white evangelicals are on a global hating spree on all non-white evangelicals. Come on! Is this 100% accurate? I don’t think so. I have relatives that are white evangelicals with a “brown” child, and they love him more than anything. This isn’t to say there is issues our white evangelicals have to come to grips with when it comes to Trump worship and racism.

Yes, Jo Luehmann was burned by evangelicalism and doesn’t even consider herself Christian. Yes, all types of brands of Christianity have done some real traumatizing harm. I get it, I am not here to gaslight or try to judge anyone’s journey.

All I am saying is that from my personal experience, these types of beliefs and statements only make our tribalistic and us vs. them tendencies even worse within the Christian faith. Identity politics and partisanship gets us nowhere.

This comes off as such an outlandish and accusatory statement that in the end, its just another Christian punchline. Its like a reading something a Christian would say but just from a conservative perspective. Like this fabulous post:

“Abortion is the sacrifice of babies on the altar of convenience. It grieves God. Every baby is uniquely created and loved by God. If you support abortion the love of the Father is not in you.”, Sean Feucht 

Can’t you see the similar tone in each of these abortion statements? Like Brian Zahnd wrote:

“Progressive fundamentalism is just as false and destructive as conservative fundamentalism”

Fundamentalism doesn’t bring about healthy spiritual dialogue. It never has. You can accuse people all day long but, in the end, all it does is divide and spread hate. It has become so ridiculous within the Christian Left and Right that it’s comical.

We have to stop accusing each other and start finding ways to reconcile our differences (easier said than done, I know). Maybe some day we will laugh at ourselves and remember all the crazy things we put out there. Here’s hoping for that day to come sooner rather than later.


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