Yesterday, I was thinking about my mother and the possibility of speaking at her funeral. I don’t know why because I am pretty sure she is going to outlive me and she may try to subvert that plan. She is an interesting person that loves to quilt and sew, but has also written and directed a play or two. We disagree on many things like politics and religion, but that’s not what I want to talk about. Before I get... Read more
When I say the church, I specifically mean Westernized Christianity. I’m not familiar with other countries, so I can’t comment. Some would say they are not as bad as someone else (usually Fundamentalists), but the entire system is broken and doesn’t work for this day and age. Here are a few things that are systemically broken, to one degree or another. There are varying degrees of nationalism. Does your church sing patriotic songs, promote exceptionalism / triumphalism of the U.S.,... Read more
For 20 years I occupied a pulpit and preached to small congregations in rural areas. For the most part, the sermons were about loving your neighbor. I never got political and I rarely stepped too far outside prescribed boundaries. I regret some of the toxic beliefs I shared, but for the most part, I felt like I was helping people be better humans. But one of the things I regret the most is my former relationship with the Bible. In... Read more
I am grateful for the opportunity to write on this site. Sometimes it surprises me how much attention a post gets. I sit down every few days and write or report what I read, and then people either read it or they don’t. My actual favorite was #3, but maybe you have a preference. Feel free to share your favorites with your audience. If you enjoy my writing, check us out on our Facebook group and at my website. The... Read more
Five years ago, when we stepped down from our final church to dive into our deconstruction, we continued to attend a church about an hour away. It was a good church whose pastor had done some deconstruction, so we found some love and acceptance and healing. It’s also where we got connected to the Benedictine Sisters that taught me to go inward. I think it was a necessary step in our evolution. But on the way home, we would get... Read more
I vividly remember Jr. High because it was a time of discovery. Almost daily, I was learning something new. Not only did I kiss my first girl, but I daily listened to what others were discovering about sex and the many mysteries of the world. The things I had never seen before were endless. I couldn’t wait to go to school, just so I could see what someone brought to show-and-tell in the boys bathroom. Back in those days, they... Read more
For the first half of my life I was very good at new years resolutions. I have always believed in setting and resetting goals and intentions. I once set some 5 year goals and realized I had achieved all of them in about 18 months. Every year, at this time, I would re-evaluate and reset my new intentions to start the coming year. Like I said, it worked pretty well in most areas of my life. However, in my book... Read more
Early in life, I knew that I hated grammar and everything related to the Language Arts. The English language has so many rules and exceptions. I struggled through every single year up until my Senior year in high school. That was when I met Mrs Allen. She was a quirky sort of teacher that taught me creative writing. For the first time, I was able to express myself without getting bogged down in the rules and conventions. I learned free... Read more
Photo by Jonathan Andrew from PexelsThe natural reaction when someone deters from the prescribed path you have imagined for them is to become dismissive or try to attach a label to them so it make sense. I do it — we all do it — I did it yesterday watching football. Typical assignments for those in deconstruction are “they’re on a slippery slope, they hate the church, they just don’t get it, they just need Jesus, they must have some... Read more
(an exert from my book, Being: A Journey Toward Presence and Authenticity) In our communities, we want people who will identify with us and sometimes even advocate for us. Occasionally, we hope they will encourage us when we are down and give us some well-timed advice when we are messing up. We want to feel like we are cared for. When we are tired, we hope someone will carry the ball—when we are motivated, we like to have someone that... Read more
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