It’s been a while since I’ve written anything on Patheos, six moths or so – and it’s not because I haven’t tried, I have, it’s because I lost all desire to post – it’s not “writer’s block” or a loss in my desire to write in general – but if I had to put into words why I stopped, it would be “my lack of compassion for the organized church.”
You see, I spent years working on my distrust with organized religion in general, and organized churches [dominations] in particular, and it came crashing down because of the PCUSA. I have spent years trying to get the organized church to see the need for change, and my most recent experience with the PCUSA knocked the wind out of my sails, and to be honest, which I strive hard to be, I came away from that encounter with an attitude that the organized church is going to hell, and I don’t give a crap.
You see, I’m not new to this popsicle stand. I’ve been in this game for years, but the PCUSA was the last straw in a huge pile of straw getting ready to be turned into cow shit. I’ve written five books [with six and seven are in the pipeline] on how the organized church needs to open it’s eyes to a changing world. But they fell on deaf ears among the leadership, not among the people. I have found, the people who read my books are getting ready to leave, or have already left the church. I receive emails, texts, and messages from people hoping the leadership of the organized church would read my books, but they won’t – what I’ve found is that the leadership have no idea who any of the Progressive Authors are, or what they’re writing – change is not in their wheel house. I’d even put money on the fact that many in leadership of the church don’t even read the Progressive Section of Patheos. They read books, and sites telling them they’re great, they’re wonderful, and their shit does not stink.
Every time I speak with a church leader, it’s the same crap over and over again when it comes to the church – the internal politics, the back-biting, the old guard fighting change, the declining membership, the misogyny, the xenophobia, the homophobia, the abuse, and how the old guard is either closed to the issues or ignoring them all together. They make excuses for their actions, or claim “they are different” – but when talking with them, they aren’t. I saw this come to life in the PCUSA, and how evil people are in control the organized church – keep in mind, treating people like crap is the ‘go to’ for the old guard, in every single denomination. While I was assured by the PCUSA leadership, on all levels. that they were different – they weren’t.
Yet, it goes deeper. You see, many pastors and ‘lay-leaders’ on the local level make excuses for the abuse of leadership, or turn a blind eye to the abuse, or they are part of the abuse – because they are invested in the current system and have learned how to live in the dysfunction of their denomination.
The particulars of what happened between myself and the PCUSA are not important – what is, is that the abuse went from the local level all the way to the national office. My lack of compassion for the organized church came to ahead with the PCUSA – and it has destroyed my compassion for all organized churches. I think it will take a great deal for me to ever trust an organized church, or a pastor or leader in the organized church, again; I’m tired