For the kingdom of God is not a matter of food and drink, but of righteousness, peace, and joy in the holy Spirit; whoever serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by others. Let us then pursue what leads to peace and to building up one another. For the sake of food, do not destroy the work of God. Everything is indeed clean, but it is wrong for anyone to become a stumbling block by eating; it is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble. Romans 14:17-21 (NABRE)
The historical context of the passage above concerns a cultural clash in the early church, specifically regarding dietary laws. As Christianity spread throughout the ancient world and came into contact with diverse people and their customs, some questions began to arise.
Is it OK to eat meat? If so, what kinds of meat are OK? And what about alcohol? Should we abstain completely, or is moderation OK? We are supposed to be new creations in Christ, but what EXACTLY do we have to change?
Now if there’s one concept that a Truthseeker abhors, it’s the notion of a “gray area.” The world has a lot more black and white in it than many people are willing to admit. “Gray area” implies uncertainty, instability, ambiguity. These are not the things that a Truthseeker seeks.
Nevertheless, they do exist. Truth is universal, but not everything you encounter is universal Truth. Some things really can apply differently to different people in different situations.
A phrase I like better than “gray area” is “bullet point.” My son picked this one up when he studied at Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. Over the decades, Moody has sent out many missionaries to some of the most dangerous parts of the world. Many of them actually have taken a bullet for their faith. Therefore, a “bullet point” refers to an aspect of Christianity that you would literally take a bullet for. Anything that doesn’t fall into that category is up for discussion.
This is a critical concept for growing Christians to keep in mind. Everyone is on his or her own journey. That does not mean that everyone has his or her own truth. It just means that we are all in a different stage of seeking the Truth that is universal and applies to us all. A bullet point is that Jesus is the only way to that Truth, because He said as much:
Jesus answered, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. The only way to the Father is through me. John 14:6 (NCV)
So we all have the same destination, and the same road to reach it. HOWEVER, we all started from a different place. Therefore, we all must take a different route to reach the main road. The common ground of our common destination, the peace of God, is the most important thing. Even so, we must not lose sight of the fact that everything else about us is different.
I am frequently annoyed at the overuse of the word “diversity” in our culture. Usually when you hear that word, someone is attempting to forcibly construct a false community out of a group of people based on what they DON’T have in common.
This is never necessary. No two people are alike. For this reason, diversity occurs naturally. It isn’t something that needs to be forced or promoted—it just IS.
As a Truthseeker, it seems counter-productive to go out of our way to celebrate our differences. Acknowledge them, yes, but putting the spotlight on what’s different isn’t what promotes peace. Rather, putting the spotlight on what is the same within a group of people who are OTHERWISE different is what leads to peace within that group.
So if Truth is found in the common ground, then it would follow that truth seeking and peace loving are one and the same. If you are constantly looking for ways you are different from other people, no matter how innocent your intentions were at first, it’s all too easy to drift toward bigotry from that stance. This is because you will have made the mental shift from “us” to “us and them.”
We keep the focus on “us” by seeking out the things that make us “us.”
Truthseeking acknowledges that people are different, and that everyone has a unique perspective. A Truthseeker values that perspective. We are not trying to be right, or to “win” the conversation. We listen to each other’s stories to learn about where we came from to get where we are.
When we take this attitude of peace into a conversation or a relationship, then we can acknowledge our naturally occurring diversity without making a false issue out of it. Where we came from doesn’t matter, and where we are now doesn’t even matter the most. It’s all about where we are going and how do we get there. This posture promotes peace from the very beginning. It creates an environment where you start thinking of your destination as a common one, and not just an individual one. You are not two ships passing in the night, but two voyagers seeking the same shore.
So how does pursuing peace play out in our culture today?
I am going to take the point of view of a mature, or at least maturing, Truthseeker. The concept in the passage at the top that we need to focus on is to not being a “stumbling block.”
From the perspective of the Church, this includes mature Christians showing grace not only to “baby Christians,” that is, those who have just joined the church, but also to those outside the church with whom we have relationships. (Yes, you can actually do that. No cap!)
The key points are these:
- Don’t ever look down on someone for not being in the same place you are, because NO ONE is in the same place you are.
- NEVER pass judgment on something that isn’t a bullet point.
These two principles can be effective in any relationship, but they are especially effective WITHIN the church. There are a lot of traditions that vary from one denomination to the next, from one church building to the next within a denomination, and even from one person to the next in a church body.
One person may have been brought up to believe that alcohol is evil. The person in the next row might have come from a background where beer is its own food group. Who’s right?
Universally speaking, if the Bible doesn’t specifically say one way or the other, then it doesn’t matter. It’s not a bullet point.
However, the main goal of Christianity is to love your neighbor as yourself (see Leviticus 19:18 and Matthew 19:19). And while it is true that offense is simply an emotional reaction to the challenging of a belief pattern, you are not walking in love if you have deliberately set out to offend.
You don’t know what you don’t know about the background of everybody you meet. If your church buddy doesn’t want to have a beer with you, or looks uncomfortable when you order a bottle of wine at dinner, this is not a sign that you need to help him “loosen up.” What if he came from an abusive home with an alcoholic father? What if he lost a friend or a child to a drunk driver?
The bottom line is that it’s not your job to “help” someone come around to your way of thinking. If they are convicted that they shouldn’t be drinking alcohol, or eating pork, or watching The King’s Speech because it’s rated R, then you must realize and accept that TO THEM, it is a sin, even if it’s not a bullet point. So rather than trying to explain your point of view, show some kindness and give up your thing for an evening to meet them where they are. You can always crack open that beer when you get home.
If we aren’t supposed to be judgmental on non-bullet points inside the church, then how much more should we avoid judging those outside! It is foolish to try to measure someone by standards of which they are not even aware. I don’t know that I’ve ever met anyone who found judgmentalism attractive. I certainly can’t think of any logical reason why a non-believer would want to consider Christianity if all they have to look forward to is having their every action scrutinized and weighed in the balance.
Now a bullet point is a bullet point, and common sense is common sense. While we shouldn’t wrinkle our nose at, say, a tattoo or a piercing, it would be another matter entirely to speak out against an extramarital affair, or the exploitation of children, for example. On these matters, we have not only the right, but the obligation to speak against these sins.
But for everything that doesn’t fall neatly on one side of the fence or the other, the path that leads to peace is the path of love. We show the evidence of this love by walking the path that emphasizes our similarities, not the things we do that are different.
(Come back for Part 3! To make sure you don’t miss it, click on the Free Newsletter link to subscribe.)
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