Something came up in my life recently that seemed important and that required a decision one way of the other.
At first I just couldn’t see which way to go. Katagiri Roshi used to encourage us if at all possible to wait three days before any major decision. So I waited and talked with those close to me and mulled it over.
After three days, I still was unclear so I delayed the decision until near the last minute.
Meanwhile, I reflected on the consequences of my actions one way and the other. I considered the possible impacts this way and that both for me and those close to me; considered it from the perspective of the dharma, the personal, the political and the psychological; considered what Roshi would do (unknowable); reflected on the patterns that might be playing out both positively and negatively with each way the decision could go.
And I wondered why I was putting so much thinking (and talking) into this!
Then today while talking with a friend and advisor suddenly it was clear.
I’ve rolled through a similar process before and it seems quite mysterious. Is that how it is for you?