Atheism and Death: Second Request

A book about Atheism and Death could either be a short, very personal exposition of the subject, with huge emotional appeal but limited practical use, or it could be something much larger and more far-reaching. It’s a rather intimidating subject, and right now I’m not sure which I’m able to undertake. So again I’m asking for help. As I relate in the adjacent post First Request, I’d like to know more about how atheists handle the death of loved ones. Not just as ordinary people faced … [Read more...]

Atheism and Death: First Request

My recent experience with death and dying hit me in two ways: First, as the guy in the middle of it, thinking and feeling it first hand, I’m grappling with ... oh, all kinds of stuff. I still get hit, several times a day, with these waves of mental discord. Something interesting happens and this wordless thought-form pops into my head: “Hey, I should call the Old Man and tell him about ...” followed instantly by this second thought-form that translates into “Oh. I can’t. Ever. ... … [Read more...]

I’m Back

I got to be with my dad from midnight on Wednesday until Sunday morning. I expect to be writing more about this at some indefinite-future time, but for now the details are this: Thanks to everybody’s donations, I got to be there with him for 3 days and a little bit more, and I was with him when he died. He knew I was there, responded to my voice, and seemed to be comforted by my touching and talking. I told him what a good man he was, and what a hole there would be in the world when he … [Read more...]

Update

I haven't been near a computer for a couple of days. Also haven't had much sleep. I'm typing this on my Droid. I'm sitting in a hospital room right now, next to my dad. He's sedated with morphine, but sometimes drifts up to consciousness that can range from muzzy to vivid. He's refused food and water since several days before I got here, so he's no longer able to talk. "I love you, Old Man. I was so lucky to have you in my life. Lucky to live in a world that had you in it. I'm here with you. … [Read more...]

Update on the Dad Thing

I took the donate button out of my Appeal post after getting enough to make the trip. The generosity of the FTB community has been overwhelming — thank you all for the kind words, well wishes, and donations! Special thanks to Greta Christina and PZ Myers for telling their readership about this post. I have a flight to Los Angeles at 5:30 a.m. I'll drive from there to the Eastern Sierra, where my Dad lives. I don't know how many days I'll be there. I'll keep you all informed as much as I can … [Read more...]

Everybody Stop Sending Money

I'm posting this from my phone (I'm at the bakery where I work), so it will be short, but people have donated enough to get me there. I'm a bit shocked at the number of hits the "appeal" post is getting, and I'm touched, wounded, blown away by the generosity. Thank you all soooo much. I'll keep you posted. … [Read more...]

An Appeal

Um. My Dad appears to be dying. And I’m pretty much broke. He lives in a little town in California; I live in a little town in upstate New York. I haven’t been in very close contact with him the last few years, but it hasn’t been all my doing. The rough-barked cowboy bastard had his phone switched off a year or so back, and his lifelong habit is to never return letters or calls, so most of our contact has been one-way, through the mail. I set him up an email account about a year back, … [Read more...]

Charley & Me — Part 1

Touchy-feely time. I’m actually a little nervous about what I’m about to write. It’s not one of those “guy” subjects a man gladly talks about. It’s not a neutral subject either, like the weather, or geology, or politics. No, it’s definitely one of those girly-girly, Oprah and Dr. Phil subjects. Yep, I’m gonna talk about my feelings. I have it figured you should never lie to yourself. You can tell all the lies you want to other people (I’m not condoning it, I’m just using … [Read more...]

Charley and Me — Part 2

Charley’s not a very big guy, but he’s solid, and every inch of him you can see is either burned a deep tan by the sun, or covered in tough hide from a lifetime of hard outdoor physical labor. Below the neck, everything inside that hide is either hard muscle, rawhide-strong tendon or solid bone. And there’s this: Charley has a reputation. He’ll fight anybody, anytime, and he’s never been known, in any town within a day’s drive, to lose. If you catch his hands still for a second, you … [Read more...]

Charley & Me — Part 3

Falling Rock was never seen again. Black Deer questioned Grey Owl and Running Wolf when they returned with the trophy, and became suspicious. He delayed his decision and sent all the tribe’s warriors out to look for signs of the missing brave. They came back with no sign of him, but expert trackers believed Falling Rock may have been attacked, had escaped, and might return. So they waited, but they also continued to search. Years passed and Black Deer died, but Shining Fawn never married. … [Read more...]