In dealing with the “blood moon” debacle, I noticed how often one generation in a church passes on the power to the next generation of family. A visit to many a mega-church website reveals a disturbing phenomena: God seems to call a startling number of children of clergy to take over the “family church” or become prominent in that ministry.
One of the best arguments for unmarried clergy, or at least unmarried bishops (or higher church leaders), is that celibate clergy cannot give their kids a job. If we think the problem is bad now, it is far worse in earlier periods of church history. One hates reading of churches handed down like property from father to son and would thank God we did not live in the bad old days if it were not still happening.
Let’s learn from church history. When married clergy were allowed to put their kids in charge by the church, it bred abuse at every turn. There are reasons that denominational structures worth having forbid this practice. No church is a business. No ministry should belong to a private family and should not be able to be left to the family. As Plato points out in Meno, it is the rare family where the child has the same gifts and calling as the parent. One effective solution is to prevent pastors from having children . . . though there are cases where pastors had children out of wedlock and left them their church in any case. If we are not going to take that solution (and I think we should not), what should we do to avoid a real problem? 
Here are four proposals based on church history and my own family experience.
First, if a church is going to hire a member of the family of the lead pastor, put them in a job that fits the credentials and pay they would have if they did not know “the boss.” If a kid comes back from college to clean toilets or cut brush on the property, that can work, if they make what the everyone else makes and are held to the same standards.
Often this should be avoided simply because the pastor’s kid is held to an unbelievably high standard.
Second, kids are often called to follow Mom and Dad into ministry. That is a good thing, but it is also a big world. Do what my Dad did: send your kids out to start their own thing or ministry outside parental control. That is good for the child, good for the church, and good for the other ministry. Should there be exceptions?
Of course, but so many have been made that perhaps we should call a moratorium for a time in evangelical ministry. Surely, in all American it is odd, very odd, that so many big ministries end up dominated by the next generation.
Third, avoid Boards or structures where family “outsiders” lack a super majority.
Families all have blind spots. Some are too hard on family members and others too soft. Boards should not have more than one voting member from the same family.
Finally, a good rule of thumb for ministerial pay remains the pay for a local elementary school principal. Pastoral ministry is hard work. As a pastor’s kid, I know how hard it is. Pastors are often well trained educationally, as my Dad was. If a church can afford it, a solid income is a good thing. A worker is worthy of his hire. However, not all jobs in the church should be monetized.
Pastoral spouses have always worked. I did stuff around the church because Dad asked me to do so. That is part of the gig. Many families pitch in to help the main breadwinner make a go of the business or ministry without monetary compensation. As a result, however, persons in the church should not make any demands on the spouse or preacher’s kids.
This can be a big problem.
Unless we want to end up with bloated payrolls, we have to accept that much of the work is done by volunteers and should be done by volunteers. The church is a ministry.
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