Plastic Android Suffers Programming Failure

Confronted by a surprise request for an expression of core principles, the Rombot 2012 generated a General Protection Fault error message:

GOP engineers are currently analyzing the software to see if the Rombot 2012 can be fixed in time to simulate interest in this particular issue in time for the election.

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  • Scott W.

    So let’s see: an entire cross-section of America votes with their dollars at Chik-Fil-A and Mitt’s gonna take a pass on courting these votes. Epic Fail.

    • Scott W.

      P.S. You would think the Rombot could have at least executed a default If-By-Whiskey response.

  • John in NE

    General Protection Fault? What, is he running Republican Candidate Botware 3.1?

    • Michael in ArchDen

      John, I believe the Constitution requires a president’s software to be at least 35 years old!

      • SecretAgentMan

        LOL! Which was a bit too short, so I had to go back and try again. LOL!

  • Phil

    I really don’t understand the media trying to equivocate the Chick fil a issue with some crazy Michelle Bachmann conspiracy theory, or Romney for essentially agreeing with his dismissive response to both.
    As Ross Douthat and probably everyone has noticed by now, Romney seems so risk averse that he’s afraid to do or say much more than “the economy is bad”. Everybody knows that, but Romney isn’t doing a very good job of articulating how he would improve it. This Chick Fil A issue a perfect example of what’s wrong with the other side’s approach. These Democratic mayors should be begging a business like Chick Fil A to come to their cities, instead of attacking it and threatening to ban it for not sharing their alleged liberals “values”. Romney could bounce all over it just from that perspective, but apparently standing up for conservative values, free speech or even just an actual business is apparently too much for him. Hell, even Obama could gain easy street cred with indepedents if he appeared above the fray by going to Chick Fil A and saying some blather about how he loves their food even though he disagree with their CEO.

    • Ted Seeber

      What seems good (asking a foreign franchise into your city) isn’t always good (when it puts a local small businessman out of business who would have kept more dollars in the city).

      Having pointed out the inherent contradiction, however, I think that stopping *any* business from opening in your city *based on the personal beliefs of the owners* and as long as those personal beliefs don’t include human sacrifice, is pretty stupid. Especially since it’s just a fast food restaurant. And I say that as a person who protested Wal-Mart moving into my city.

  • SecretAgentMan

    “Look Voter, I can see you’re really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. Telling people what they can talk about is not part of my campaign. I have no connection to anyone who thinks anything about gay marriage, Christian opposition to gay marriage, boycots, supporting businesses, or whether it’s wrong for Chik-Fil-A to stack pickles on a sandwich rather than evenly-distrubuting them across the bun’s face so that every bite gets a bit of pickle. Not that there’s anything wrong or right with any of those things. I’ve just picked up a fault in the AE35 corporate-tax indexing and exemption unit. It’s going to go 100% failure in 91 days. I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I’ve still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the campaign. And I want to help you.”

  • Mark S. (not for Shea)

    Two months ago I thought Obama had a very tough election in front of him. I’m becoming less sure of that by the day. Every time Romney opens his mouth, it becomes evident how empty that suit is.

  • ds

    No one at the chicken for FREEDOM! day event was ever going to vote for Obama. Romney doesnt need to get their vote, hes wisely courting the mushball middle.

    • ds

      Gonna lose regardless.

  • James

    Must presidential candidates comment on every manufactured media controversy? I think we should ALL start hitting the “ignore” button, along with Romney.

  • Andy, Bad Person

    Let me tell you what the most pressing moral issue of our day is.