the fears are gone

sophia fearless drawing by nakedpastor david hayward

Sophia “Fearless” by nakedpastor David Hayward

I came across an old blog post, The Sum of All My Fears”. I realized, upon reading the list of 10 fears, that all of them were related to me being a pastor within the church. Take a look:

  1. angering my superiors;
  2. upsetting people in my church who can do damage;
  3. being excommunicated;
  4. losing these friends;
  5. my family being hurt because of me;
  6. our church closing down;
  7. being unemployed;
  8. being attacked and ridiculed by those within and outside of the church;
  9. offending more people here than I help;
  10. being wrong (truly a heretic) and leading people astray.

I left the ministry at that particular church, and left the church, in the spring of 2010. I’ve visited a few since then. But once I left the ministry, all of these fears disappeared. I’m not saying the answer for me was to leave the church. What I am saying though is that once I left the church, I realized that these fears were somehow nurtured by the church and its support of the professional ministry. In other words, these are the fears that accompany ministry.

Now I realize that they were as nothing. I wish I knew that then.

Get a print of Sophia “Fearless”.

About David Hayward

David Hayward runs the blog nakedpastor as a graffiti artist on the walls of religion where he critiques religion… specifically Christianity and the church. He also runs the online community The Lasting Supper where people can help themselves discover, explore and live in spiritual freedom.

  • Kris

    And the opposite of fear is love :)