One Minute Message “Show Them Your But”

Do you get pity for making a wise decision for your own personal health and wellbeing? Watch this one minute message called “Show Your But” which gives you an easy 3-step response to unwanted pity.

Pass it on to those who could use this advice!

About David Hayward

David Hayward runs the blog nakedpastor as a graffiti artist on the walls of religion where he critiques religion… specifically Christianity and the church. He also runs the online community The Lasting Supper where people can help themselves discover, explore and live in spiritual freedom.

  • Adam Julians

    That is so funny David – I might use that in my stand up. Britlliant.
    Hmmmm I can learn something here – I tend to be a lot more abrubt with the way I engage with people when they say stuff like that. I hadn’t really thougth about it from the point of vie of them showing concern andwanting to serve. I’m going to give that some thought. I have alway though to this kind of thing form the potin of view of others wanting to control, do what make them feel good and give them status as the helper or whatever. The doctor that administers the medicine to the porr patient and there being a power and control thing in that.

    i can see how what you would say would work wiht someone who is willing and able to reason. But how would you deal with someone who then takes offense to the “but”? Can I suggest somethign from my recent expereince. I find that agreeing with them works. Bear with me for a second. I was sharing some thigns that had been going on with me. Someone got their finger in my face and raised their voice with a senstence that included “you should” and “God”. The way I engaged with that was to say “OK so I am supposed to do what you say God would have me do then” said confidently, calmly and assertively, it resulted in a verbal ju jitsu with using the other person’s strength against them. They became siltent and once we were alone they came and apologised to me. I mentioned how frightening it had been for her to get her finger in my face and talk like that and she apologised for that too. I’d call that a good result.

    So yeah I like your “but”, I would also say, have one or two other things up your sleve to bring out at times when someone isn’t willng or able to reason.

  • http://sunwalked.wordpress.com Roger

    But me no butts, neither butt me no buts!

    Actually your three-pronged defence is very similar to a three-pronged way to deal with unwanted thoughts in meditation; “Hello – welcome. Thank-you. Goodbye.” (Visualize unwanted thought exiting stage right.)

    Smile: Breathe: Go mindfully (I’m working on it!)

    Roger

  • carole

    This is to your videolet about Joy, I suggest you re discover the mystics, centuries and continents apart, those who sought God found all encompassing love and JOY. Meister Eckhart, St Theresa of Avila, Hafiz, etc. I am presenting these empowered by God’s love poets to my congregation on Sunday, Thanks to the UCC pastor who is inviting me to do so. Read Love Letters FROM God, 12 Sacred Voices from the East and West, translated by Daniel Ladinsky. I enjoy your site. Keep it up forever please.

  • http://nakedpastor.com David Hayward

    thanks carole. i’ve read all those ;)

  • Rhonda Sayers

    I like big buts and I can not lie…;-)


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