how to shape the dreams of our girls

shape girls dreams cartoon by nakedpastor david hayward

“Shaping the Dreams of Our Girls” (by nakedpastor David Hayward)

Most people aren’t even aware that they are limiting the dreams of girls. Most aren’t conscious of the fact that they are shaping the dreams of their daughters and female students into a sexist ideal or a misogynist fantasy. Not only do men do this, but women too. This can be corrected.

I was raised in a sexist culture. I need constant instruction to overcome my innate assumptions that are drilled into me by our misogynist society. I’m glad to be married to a strong woman. I’m glad to have a strong daughter. I’m glad to have strong women for friends.

Unfortunately, many churches limit women intentionally. And they refuse correction because they believe they are right, with God and the Holy Scriptures on their side.

About David Hayward

David Hayward runs the blog nakedpastor as a graffiti artist on the walls of religion where he critiques religion… specifically Christianity and the church. He also runs the online community The Lasting Supper where people can help themselves discover, explore and live in spiritual freedom.

  • TomAllyn

    I’m not sure I understand how the above demonstrates hatred of women. It certainly illustrates an unrealistic cultural false ideal and expectation of how a woman should look. Which intern feeds self-hatred and discust by both men and women of those outside the false ideal which is misogyny. Please help me understand.

  • Karen Slappey

    most of the men that i know would never intentionally use sexist language, but sexism is so embedded in our culture that it finds its way through in the most benign of ways… and this doesn’t just happen with sexism. any of us who know privilege have been guilty. when this happens, it doesn’t mean we’re a horrible people, we need not be defensive. it just means we’re guilty of not being aware of the inequity that exist in systems that have been allowed to perpetuate. this is especially troubling when we see that sexism and racism are commonly perpetuated through women, usually our mothers. it can change. and it can start with us. language matters.

  • Bernice Stuller Duckrow

    @Tom: It is not that the above demonstrates hatred of women. It is, in part, that the culturally glorified image of how a woman should look and act makes women like themselves less, in part about men being afraid of a loss of control and power over women (very generalized – don’t take it personally (unless the shoe fits), and the limitations that our culture puts on women – or more to the point that culture encourages women to put limits on themselves.

  • klhayes

    Love that depiction. This is so ingrained in our society that people don’t realize that they do this to girls from the time they are born.

  • klhayes

    Hatred of any girl/woman that does not fit their limited view. It’s not just about body parts. It’s about fear of strong confident women who follow their own dreams.

  • TomAllyn

    Thank you. I agree 100% that is a HUGE issue. Nevertheless my understanding of Davids cartoon is that it dealing with molding a girls body image based on western cultural bias. Which as I understand it is a different issue.

  • TomAllyn

    I agree 100%, but misogyny is defined as the hatred of women which is what confused me confused me as David use the image to illustrate misogyny according to the commentary he provided. IMO what the imagine illustrates is an entirely different hugely ugly truth about western culture.

  • http://www.whatisinc.ca/ Paul Fisette

    It’s not limited to western culture. Here in Asia the young women aren’t “white” enough, skinny enough, tall enough, or whatever else. You should see the malls in Thailand where whole floors are dedicated to turning women into Barbie dolls. Now that pervasive culture is spilling into Laos where the women are limited to watching mostly Thai TV.

  • Gary

    Hatred of women is the most extreme form of misogyny, but the term is not limited to just hatred. Many definitions include dislike and/or mistrust. Believing that women have a certain “role” to play based upon their gender alone can certainly be evidence of dislike of the female gender. Even a lack of respect IMHO is a form of misogyny because to not respect someone is usually to dislike something about them.

  • ThomasAllynWilson

    Gary, Thank you – this makes sense!

  • Susan_Phillips

    Misogyny shapes the dreams of boys, too.


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