Monday Morning Confessional

Monday Morning Confessional March 11, 2013

I confess that I am excited about watching from afar as the Catholic Church elects a new Pope. Despite my excitement, I confess that I’m bothered that the way the process is covered makes it seem less like a solemn religious conclave and more like a royal wedding, which is regrettable. I confess that my favorite coverage will probably come from The Daily Show and Stephen Colbert, which means that I am part of the problem, not part of the solution.

I confess that even the Roman Catholic church seems to be caught up in pragmatic concerns. I confess that of all the issues facing the church universal, I think the biggest is the unity of the body – the first of the four notae ecclesiae, or marks of the church (one, holy, catholic, apostolic). The biggest threat to the church is the way we are visibly disunited. I think this is a spiritual concern, not a pragmatic one.

I confess that I cheated on my Lenten fast twice last week. I confess that I stayed up extra late last night just so I could have something more to eat after 8pm (our tradition practices a “free-day” on Sunday because it is always a celebration of the resurrection, even during lent). It was glorious, albeit high-fructose-corn-syrup-laden feast which I now regret.

I confess that I’ve given three messages in 24 hours and feel a tad exhausted. The final message was just a 15 minute morning devotional message for my kid’s school. I confess that it was by far the most intimidating of the three. I confess that I think all pastor’s should be required to speak to/with children on a regular basis. I found the questions my heart had to ask in order to prep for kiddos to be centering and healthy.

I confess that one of the most surprising things to me about being a parent is the suffering a parent feels when their children are working through emotional pain. I have watched it happen to others. I have heard all about it, and I knew it was coming. But when it first starts to happen – real emotional pain in these precious little things for whom I would gladly trade my soul – it’s bitter pill to realize there’s nothing I can do to prepare for it, and little I can do to alleviate it.

I confess that I am hyper-sensitive to gossip these days, both in myself and others. That I am sensitive to gossip comes by way of my own judgmentalism. First I was judging someone I know for gossip. Then I remembered that I’m not better & that in my judgments I merely condemn myself. Then I started to watch for gossip in my own life. Then I became amazed (…not hyperbole, literally amazed), at how much people approach me with gossip and how easy I can get sucked in. The twin sisters of judgment and gossip may well me the favorite sins of American Evangelicalism. They are certainly the most overlooked and accepted.

I confess that it seems odd to me that judgment is not spelled with an “e” in there (judgement). Maybe then it would be pronounced judgy-ment, sort of like vegemite, which is a really cool word. I would like the word judgy-ment. “Don’t get your judgy-ment all over me. While I’m on the subject I’m bothered by the spelling of shoe. Why not sh0o, or shue (in honor of Elizabeth, my first crush)? It’s like spelling the word “zoo”: z-o-e.

I confess that my favorite way critique things lately is to add “un” to the beginning and “able to the end of a word.” It sounds better to me when this forms a franken-word, for instance: That song is unsingable. That person is unfriendable.  My dog is unsmellable. That show is unwatchable. Although it is still fun to say the bona fide ones like: that idea is unworkable, my clothes are unwearable, or this blog is unreadable.

Okay friends, I made my confession. Time for you to make yours.


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