Why do YOU skip Mass? UPDATED

Lisa Hendey posts on an interesting study on why Catholics skip mass.

I’ve written over at First Things about a brother of mine who goes to Mass every day of the week, but never on a Sunday; the noise and the over-busyness of Sunday liturgies is beyond what his fragile nerves can endure, and rather than spend an hour being uncharitable, impatient or panicked, he just avoids mass on Sunday, and trusts that between God and his pastor, he’ll get by with a stretch in Purgatory.

On the rare occasions that I miss mass, it’s usually because I’ve meant to go to a five o’clock mass and then gotten so distracted that I’ve missed it. Admittedly, that usually happens when the clocks are turned ahead or back, and the sunlight fools me. Holy days sometimes throw me off, and send me running to confession because I hate not being able to receive Holy Communion the following Sunday.

A few decades ago, though, I missed mass quite a lot, and it really came down to a combination of awful music, uninspired homilies and my own spiritual immaturity.

But Lisa’s post made me curious: when you have skipped mass, why have you done it? If you routinely skip mass, why? What is not working, for you?

UPDATE:
What would make you leave the church?
Deacon Greg just got an email from someone who says the crying babies are driving her away! Writes Greg:

She may not feel it now, but she is always welcome. Always. The same door she walked through to leave remains unlocked and open, awaiting her return.

About Elizabeth Scalia
  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.okeefe.144 Michael O’Keefe

    In my worse state, it’s because I was in a state of sin, intended to commit the same sins again, and didn’t want to face Mass.

    For a while, I missed Mass because I was waiting for a family member to come with me.

    Lately, when I miss Mass it’s because of exhaustion or sickness. Few aesthetic problems can keep me from Mass; at least, I haven’t found any. It’s always me..

  • Christian LeBlanc

    I do not skip Mass. Period.

  • vox borealis

    I sometimes missing mass for kid-related reasons, though some of these times, I must admit, I use the kids as an excuse (i.e., Timmy is sick, let’s all just sleep in this morning). I am also very fussy liturgically. If I can’t make it to one of my trusted liturgies (i.e., the “high” mass on Sunday at 11:00), I am more inclined to skip because I just can’t face the chaos at, say, the Saturday evening mass or the Sunday 12:30 (both geared towards families, which in my experience translates into a lot of liturgical silliness). When I travel, if I can’t find an EF mass, I will sometimes but not always skip, because I just don;t trust what I find in strange places when it comes to the OF.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=20602584 Mark Duch

    “In my worse state…” Been there! Hmm, that reminds me, I need to go to confession…

  • TheodoreSeeber

    In May? with my family?

    To go to a Mass in a different city of course (had to skip out on EOE duties this week to go to my nephew’s 1st Communion).

  • boinkie

    when I was in the USA, I dreaded the mass for the same, and the worst was that we had to shake hands with a stranger as if anyone in our church cared who I was or bothered to be friendly the rest of the week.

    Here in the Philippines, I dread church because I don’t speak the language and even at 7 am it tends to be hot…. However, the music is nicer…we actually are greeted after mass by our neighbors and relatives (and the professional beggars of course).

  • Anon

    We skipped Mass last weekend because we instead spent 19 hours driving in a car (roundtrip) to spend 38 hours in the locale where my nephew’s wedding and his sister’s graduation party was being held. The wedding was held during a typical Mass timeframe but was not a Catholic wedding (which is a whole ‘nother can of worms, I realize). I did think about going Sunday morning but frankly did not even want to bring the subject up because it would only feed the “Aunt P is the overly pious one” vibe I feel going on since my husband and I refused to go on a family vacation (including our two old-enough-to-know children) with a cohabitating relative and her….roommate. So combination of negative peer pressure, feeble attempt at not worsening strained relationships and an exhausting travel schedule. And I had been sick all week. Other than this recent event I don’t skip Mass unless I am sick or something completely unexpected happens, like a car breakdown and I can’t get there.

  • craig

    I’m not a Catholic, not officially yet, but I have been going to Mass for a number of years now. (And staying in my seat at communion, thankyouverymuch; I deal with it by seeing it as my job to serve as an example to others who shouldn’t receive for their own different reasons.)

    But I have missed Mass a lot lately, and it’s mostly due to tiredness. I loved Pope Benedict like family (still do), and Pope Francis is saying good things too although I don’t feel a personal connection to him the way I do to Benedict. But that Church — the supernaturally real one with Peter preaching the gospel to the world and confronting the spirit of the age — is not one can I perceive in any of the parishes near me. So I’m tired: tired of struggling every week to perceive anything supernaturally real, tired of all milk and no meat in the sermons, tired of sappy and effeminate music, tired of bishops and priests who are quiet when it comes to the Gospel but loud in support of the Democratic Party platform. I’m also tired of praying to no effect for the same old things year after year, things which the Bible tells us God also desires (and which I don’t *think* I’m praying for out of selfishness?).

    Suck it up and soldier on, I know. But it seems there ought to be joy in soldiering on, and so far I can’t feel it.

  • Palmcroft

    Miss confession = miss mass, or be late and half-ass it; and I miss confession too damned much, as does, by the look of it, everyone under 70 who goes to my church. Long/short, needs work.

  • hotboogers

    My handicapped spouse is a bit fragile and gets every virus that wafts through town. The music and general liturgical sense of every parish within a 45-min drive is abominable and leaves me feeling assaulted by the end of the hour. I am dry. When those three things coincide … and spouse stays home sick … that’s when I miss, and it happens regularly all winter. I had a priest tell me that attending Mass is spiritually helpful because it helps me connect with/be a part of the parish community … what I didn’t have the heart to tell him Is that the truth is opposite … the wealthy self-absorbed parish to which I belong is not my community, just a geographic accident … they want no part of me or mine … they don’t even have enough handicapped parking to accommodate half the handicapped parishioners at each Mass, and I do mean that literally. There is no option for people who want a quiet or traditional-music observance, not even on weekdays. The pastor is an Irish glad-hander, a delightful old man, but not a shepherd. The parish is generally run by well-meaning middle-aged women, and I thirst to see strong MEN OF FAITH in action, not just golfing with the Knights. The Eucharist is reserved in an abominably-designed “chapel” which is a thoroughfare for access to the sacristy … meaning there is no opportunity for quiet prayer either before or after any Masses. There is no nourishment in that place. The surrounding parishes are much the same and farther to drive (important when you’re dealing with physical handicaps). Yes, I know Christ in the Eucharist is the same regardless of external circumstances. Yes I know. And yet my very body trembles with the torment. Spouse and I try to attend Saturday vigils, as that seems to be more reliable for us, but it is still an exercise in mortification for both of us for different reasons. Why o why must Mass be a mortification in this way?

  • MeanLizzie

    I am sorry to hear that you’re not feeling amply “fed” at your current parish. Are you in RCIA?

  • http://www.facebook.com/adam.frey.92 Adam Frey

    I’ve only missed Mass on a few occasions, most of which I’m not proud of.

    Once was as a kid. I was dawdling and my mom got sick of waiting for me to get in the car, so she just left. Probably not her best moment as a parent, but the fault was largely mine.

    Once was in a seven-week stretch where I was living in Spain and I was honestly dabbling in Protestantism. I was too lazy to figure out when the local Masses were being held, and I don’t think my Spanish was good enough to follow along. (This is possibly an argument for Latin mass–it’d have been the same service.) Still, the fault was mine, and I should have gone.

    * – Aside: when I lived in Ireland, I went to a Mass in Gaelic, and I largely understood what was going on. Oh, I didn’t know the language, but I’d been to more than enough Masses that I could tell when it was the Gospel, the Our Father, etc.

    Once was when I was working at a hurricane shelter with the military, and the storm was on a Sunday. No Catholic priest available, but there was a Protestant chaplain who held a service. I attended that just for the sake of having “something,” while recognizing it as a compensation rather than a substitute.

    The most recent occasion was when I deployed to Afghanistan a few years ago. My departure date was unexpectedly moved up, and I had to rush to Norfolk on a Saturday evening to catch my very-early-Sunday flight. In theory, I could have checked in and then tried to find a cab to rush to the base chapel for Saturday evening Mass, but I was honestly so flustered that I just plumb forgot about my Sunday obligation. I’m pretty sure I had both a valid excuse and a negation of sinful intent on that one, at least.

  • Victor Savard

    Congratulation Christian and i’m sure that as a good Christian, you don’t mean to imply that GOD (Good Old Dad) love you more than he does any of his other children weather, “I” mean whether or not they go and/or don’t go to church NOW?

    Please continue to pray for this ass, “I” mean this Annoying Super Sinner NOW.

    Forgive me Anchoress i did not read all the links that you provided but for what “IT” is worth, all of these comments really touched me in some ways though.

    Go Figure folks. :)

    Peace

  • Tina

    I haven’t been to Mass since I had to drive a friend. I pretty much don’t go anymore. I can’t stand it. I don’t belong. I see families, I see couples, I see friends greeting each other and it just tears at my heart and I end up crying. I don’t get it. Whatever it is I’m supposed to get from going to Mass, I don’t get. Clearly I’m doing something wrong but I don’t know what. I contemplate going back but then things like what happened last Sunday occurred and I want to wash my hands of the whole business. I was visiting a new town and was checking out one of the older churches. I didn’t see the main doors, but followed some people in a side door, which led me to a hall. There was a deacon and I asked him how to get to the church and he said “Why do you want to know?” Seriously. On a Sunday morning 30 minutes to Mass time. Gee I don’t know. I’m done with the whole business.

  • craig

    No, and it’s not due to any rejection of Catholic doctrine as spelled out in the Catechism; I have read that and could sign on the dotted line without lying. If it weren’t for the trouble of a year-long RCIA, I’d probably already be Catholic.

    Every now and then I think it’s time to go through the pains of joining, but then something else (scandal, leftist politics, teeth-grinding liturgy, etc.) comes along to piss me off and send me back to square one. I don’t hold to Groucho Marx’s dictum (“I don’t want to join any club that would have me as a member”), but it’d be great not to think that the folks who are already Catholic appear to believe this stuff *less* than I do. Maybe RCIA is intended to keep people like me out until we learn to overlook all this.

    Please forgive me for venting. Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner.

  • AL

    Maybe I am just a grump but I go to the Sat. afternoon mass because I like the music they sing then (more traditional although still out of the OCP book). I don’t like what our official choir director chooses. Too jazzy and usually unsingable so it is more like a choir performance. And I don’t like standing and singing during and after communion (I think that’s a local anomaly since I haven’t seen it elsewhere). I would much prefer quiet meditation. I guess I could just do that on my own though, rather than “conforming”.

    And I dawdle going into the church so I can miss the greet-each-other process before mass, when we are going to do it again in a half hour. One handshake with everyone within reach is enough, And I hate watching half the congregation go up to Communion and then straight out the door and the pastor never says anything. Why not, for heaven’s sake? Would you go to a friend’s house for dinner and leave the minute you finished eating?

    Yes, I am a grump.

    My sister’s husband hates Sunday Mass (it is painful to him) so they go on Thursday morning. My sister says it’s then or not at all.

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  • Nan

    If I’m sick or overextended + overtired and don’t wake up for 8am Mass on a day that I’m booked solid for the other Masses. It’s rare and I always confess to it, no matter the reason as I need to be strict with myself after not having been raised as a regular massgoer. It would be too easy to get into the habit of skipping Mass.

  • Tom

    I honestly haven’t been to Mass in a very long time. I went through a period of soul searching and tried to take in the faith as best as I possibly could, and the more deeply I delved into the Catholic Church, the more angry I became at every Mass I went to. This might sound horrible of me, but there are just so many people there who obviously don’t believe from people who publicly support abortion, priests who give overly-ecumenical sermons, and families who let their children dress in shorts, tank tops, and flip flops while chewing gum. I don’t mean to sound holier-than-thou, though I’m sure that’s how I’m coming off. I just wish that I felt like I was surrounded by fellow believers rather than people who just happened to be born into the Church. Maybe I’ve just romanticized my childhood, but I used to feel like Mass was my home, and now I feel cut off :/

  • http://www.facebook.com/rebecca.duncan.7359 Rebecca Duncan

    I go to Saturday vigil mass and never Sunday morning mass if I can help it. It counts as my obligation, that’s good enough for me. I don’t consider it skipping mass at all since I’ve done my Sunday obligation. I cantor Saturday vigil mass pretty much every week so there’s that. I also don’t like getting up in the morning. I can’t concentrate, I feel horrible. I work from evening until night now and it’s always been my schedule to sleep in the day and be awake in the evening through the night. Plus, it’s crowded and sometimes I have to endure a guitar mass if I go on Sunday morning. I don’t go to weekday mass that much because it’s early in the morning and it’s only three times a week at my parish (the only one in town).

  • TJ

    I don’t know where you live, but you should look into finding an Eastern Rite Catholic Church. The liturgy is very traditional.

  • Proteios

    I don’t ‘skip’ mass but I have missed when I am sick or my kids are. It is not an option to skip.

    What would make me leave…
    1. continued homilies that don’t connect teachings to real life struggles.
    Example. Not using contraception can be a challenge. It’s one tht when an appropriate passage comes along, address the issue head on. I need to hear it and live with it. Not everything is suited to me. This goes for social issues on homosexuality, healthcare, etc or seemingly subtle issues like family members taking communion in grave sin and how to address it. I want true teachings of the Church applied to gospel and real life. I want to learn. If I am already just fine as I am, then why would I consider the priest a teacher or leader. He’s just a guy telling me I’m good enough.
    2. I go to school to learn. I go to church to learn. I didn’t think I knew algebra when class started, but I know a lot more after the final exam. Same with Church. I don’t know it all. Help me experience the mystigogia and grow and learn. Classes, prayer time, devotions, adoration. MORE!
    3. The keep everyone happy mentality. If this is so dang easy, why would God have bothered sending His Son? It’s tough. Tell us. You can tell us in a loving way. A stern way. A crazy way. All of the above, but don’t let us continue to sin and say its ok.
    4. Mass is about Jesus. Not the music. Not fundraisers. Nothing else. Celebrate other stuff at the social after mass.
    5. Loss of reverence drives me nuts. We’re here for Jesus. Jesus isn’t showing up because you’re going to be there this week. Oh, and dress like you’re going to see God. I love the Packers as much as I’m legally allowed to, but put the jersey on when you get home…especially, when your serving. Uff da!
    6. Crying children don’t bother me. God made them. That’s the future of the Church and all the daily mass goers seem to know this. It’s the weekend worshipers and their…why am I not being convenienced here attitude that is worked up over kids crying.

    Are these reasons, or am I just complaining? I forgot.

  • Proteios

    As this meant to be ironic? Cuz it is.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001299617319 Terry Carlino

    I guess I must be uncharitable too, because I also don’t skip Mass. Just several weeks ago I missed the first Mass since I returned to the Church. I was a chaperon on a youth retreat and the priest who was to say Mass for us did not show up. Don’t know why, though I expect it was for a good reason. Father gave us a dispensation, since there was no way we could have attended Mass (we were at a relatively isolated retreat location and by the time we found out no priest was coming there was no way to arrange to travel to a parish church.)

    There are two good reasons I don’t skip Mass, no matter how horrible the externals are. One some people might consider trivial, but I certainly don’t. We are bound to go to mass under pain of mortal sin. I personally can’t get by that one. I commit enough mortal sins that I don’t seem able to avoid. I can’t abide in myself committing one which is so easy to avoid.

    The second, which I consider the lesser of the two, but which some might consider more important, is that in many places of this world people are lucky to be able to go to Mass once a month or twice a year, or in some places hostile to Christianity, never or only be risking imprisonment or sometimes even death. How could I think that any reason I could come up with to not go to Mass when I’m able would be valid enough when so many lack the opportunity that I have?

  • Erin Pascal

    I sometimes miss mass because of my kids. When we are attending mass, it’s really difficult to control my kids and my attention and focus is always on them and not on the mass. I know that I’m the problem because as their parent, it’s my responsibility to control them especially when attending a mass but it’s just really difficult to listen and focus while keeping an eye on your kids.

  • Libby Edwards

    I never miss Sunday Mass unless I’m sick with a fever. And I honestly can’t think of anything that would drive me away from Mass. Like most people, I have music I prefer and favorite priests, preferences in liturgical style, etc. I’m easily distracted and annoyed by squirming, noisy kids. But it’s at Mass that I receive the Body of Christ! I can’t get it anywhere else! :D I think I’d sit in a pew full of broken glass with a brass band socked against my ears rather than pass that up.

    I’m reminded of a Mass my sister attended while on vacation. We attend a fairly traditional parish with a very “old school” priest. The vacation parish was almost garishly modern, with nary a Gregorian chant in sight, oodles of tank tops and flip flops–things we never (or rarely) see at home, and my sister was uncomfortable and unhappy. Until she received the Eucharist, and suddenly everything “clicked.” She said the best part was when she looked up after, and saw another parishioner returning to her pew. The woman was weeping with joy. :)

  • CincyMatty

    I go to mass very rarely these days. Going to mass has always felt like an unpleasant chore. I didn’t like it when I was kid, and I don’t like as an adult. Mass attendance was like exercise; I knew it was good for me, but it was never any fun. I went regularly when I was younger, out of a sense of obligation. As I’ve gotten older, I have shifted into kind of a quasi-agnosticism. I’m just not sure about God any more. I still pray everyday, but it increasingly feels like I’m talking to myself. The Church and its rules (some of which make little sense to me) feel more like the product of men and less like God’s will. I don’t enjoy mass, and I’m not inclined to go just to follow rules that I increasingly doubt. If someone where to ask me what religion I was, I would still say Catholic, but I certainly accept that I’m a “Bad Catholic.” I could never “renounce” the Church. I love the Church, and I’m interested in it (I like to read Elizabeth’s blog, for example), but it’s more of an intellectual exercise than a spiritual one these days. Oh, I think if I’m fortunate enough to have kids, I’ll be back with them on a weekly basis (I had to go, so do they – builds character). I hold out some hope that I’ll get back in the swing of it. Huge confession, a little purgatory, hopefully things will work out. I don’t mean to scandlize all the good Catholics out there. I do very much appreciate your sincere faith and efforts with the Church.

  • Stephen J.

    Pure sloth, nothing more.

  • http://leelusplace.blogspot.com/ leelu

    I haven’t been to Mass as an active participant in over 40 years

    I grew up in the parish of Cardinal (then Bishop) Timothy Manning in Los Angeles. He surrounded himself with intelligent, thoughtful priests, so as I got older, I found the sermons were interesting and challenging. I even managed to (at least) not hate the Bishop’s yearly state of the parish sermon.

    When I was about 16, Bishop Manning was moved to run another diocese up north. He was replaced by a “Pray to Mary, light some candles and everything will be OK” Irish priest. I started looking around for someplace else, but couldn’t find one. Mass at college was a guitar folk fest, and I finally gave up, declaring myself agnostic when I was 20.

    I guess I was spoiled by the level of thoughtfulness, sincere faith, and caring that Bishop Manning brought to us at St. Gregory’s. I was never able to find a replacement, and it all seemed to be more piety than thoughtful faith.

  • kmbold

    Sounds like another case of sloth. Pray for faith. Make acts of faith.

  • http://www.facebook.com/mike.lutz.9235 Mike Lutz

    Same with me, Stephen J. I attend the great majority (but no all) Sundays, my Holy Day attendance is sporadic. I won’t even try to excuse or explain my failure – there is no excuse.

  • RachaelM

    Maybe I’m blessed with a wonderful parish. I’m in RCIA and have been the past 3 “long” years because an annulment issue is sloooooooowly getting straightened out. I “have” to go to Mass on Sundays for the dismissal of the RCIA after the Liturgy of the Word, but I go for the whole Mass occasionally on Saturday nights at 5:30 pm when I want to celebrate the Vigil of an upcoming Solemnity, and on Holy Days of Obligation. I occasionally attend 8 am Mass on the weekdays, preferring those Masses for their intimacy and smaller crowd. At any full Mass I attend, I ALWAYS go up to the celebrating Priest during Holy Communion and get a blessing. By the way, those blessings I’ve discovered are CUMULATIVE! I will miss RCIA Mass and other Masses (like Christmas this past year) when I’m not feeling well, but I always follow the Mass in my daily “Living With Christ.” The other thing I’ve done, and encourage EVERYbody to do, is find what interests (callings) you have at your Parish, and participate. I always see 20% of the Parishioners doing 80% of the lay Ministries. That’s unfortunate. It’s the participation that’s makes a person feel a part of. There’s joy in seeing the same people every week and slooooowly getting to know them based on common interests. The final thing is studying everything I can about the Mass, especially the Liturgy of the Eucharist. Again, maybe I’m part of a wonderful Parish, but the same lay Ministries are everywhere. If there isn’t in your Parish, then start ‘em!

  • kmbold

    Attending weekday Masses gives me the strength for Sundays. Try closing your eyes during Mass so you aren’t offended by the sights, shut out the awful music by reading prayers, and one day things may improve. I have been in parishes that had “nothing” going for them but Jesus Himself in the Eucharist and have been rewarded later with dynamic and saintly pastors.

  • kmbold

    I think we are in the same parish, or at least the same diocese.

  • MeanLizzie

    But isn’t it sad that we have to just “shut out the awful music” because, apparently, we’re not able to fix it? Or we just won’t?

  • kmbold

    How?

  • MeanLizzie

    We have 2000 years of brilliant music, chant, hymns; nothing in VCII said we were supposed to do away with them, only that we should mix it up a bit. I guess we have to pester the pastors, most of whom are disinterested in music and won’t do anything unless they get serious pushback.

  • http://www.facebook.com/verkonika Veronica Salazar

    In the past 8 years I’ve missed Sunday Mass twice, in both occasions because I was on business trips and couldn’t attend the Saturday vigil in the closest town with vigil (I live in the Deep South). Also, in both cases, I thought I would be arriving in time for the last mass of the day at my destination, which did not happened. So now I am more careful with my preparations.

  • Alex

    Usually I skip Mass when the weekend is overbooked or when I think I’ll be free to go to a specific Mass and then something turns up to prevent this.

  • http://www.facebook.com/rebecca.fuentes.92 Rebecca Fuentes

    When my toddler started throwing up thirty minutes before Easter Sunday mass, I stayed home. :( I wasn’t happy about it. My parents took my older children to Mass. I cannot imagine anything that would make me choose to stay home from Mass other than sickness. Our parish is small, so sometimes we have music, sometimes not. Depending on who is leading the singing, it can be very good or . . . not so. Since I am in no position (and have no vocal talent) to offer my services to our music ministry, I don’t complain. Our parish had no regular priest for nearly a year. We had a different priest every Sunday, only communion services on weekdays (And sometimes on Sundays when bad weather prevented the priest from coming). Bad music, bad sermons, wiggly kids–I NEED the Eucharist. I am very grateful for our pastor now–we get to have daily Mass, and his sermons are usually very good.

  • http://www.facebook.com/verkonika Veronica Salazar

    Now that I read better your question is “why would I skip mass”, not “why did I miss it”. I do not skip mass either, not even 5 days after a painful surgery that requires from me to walk with crutches and no weigh-bearing on one of my legs. Although our priest said he was dispensing me under can. 1245, I ask my husband to take me to the 7:30AM mass which is shorter and do not have a choir singing. Still, it was a bit rough for me, but my spirit was soaring when father came to my pew to give me the Holy Communion! I do not judge anybody’s reasons for skiping mass, but I can’t begin to tell you how good God is with us when we do a little sacrifice.

  • http://www.facebook.com/verkonika Veronica Salazar

    Hi Craig. I feel your pain man! I had to bear “liberation theology” Jesuits at the parish closest to my College campus just because I could attend daily mass and receive the Eucharist. If you think liberal Catholics here in the States are unbearable, you should listen a Marxist with South American twist. I would literally shut down my ears at the sloppy, leftist preaching, and concentrate in Christ’s presence, offering my little sufferings in union with His for my loved ones, and praying for those in need that had asked me to remember them in my prayers. I know what it means to be tired of bad liturgy and bad preaching, but a friend told me once that we go to church both when we feel good and when we don’t. Sometimes we feel consolations, sometimes we are dry as a desert, no consolations, no feelings, nothing, nada! Don’t skip it because you don’t “feel” anything. Hey! Anyone can “feel” more during their favorite artist’s performance. I felt more during a U2 concert than what I did at Sunday Mass that following Sunday! In the end feelings can be deceived, the devil knows this, so just don’t bet hung up on this. Because of feelings a lot believe things or morals contrary to the faith, because of feelings not a small part of Catholics in the USA support positions irreconcilable with Catholic doctrine. As another reply recommended, find an Eastern Rite Catholic church, or maybe you just need to pray for that priest leading a bad liturgy and ask for him the grace of a true renewal in his ministry. You don’t know how many wonders God might bring upon him by your prayers and your sacrifice… Or maybe the Bishop will assign another, more traditional priest! :D

  • http://www.facebook.com/verkonika Veronica Salazar

    No problem Craig. But perhaps that’s precisely the reason you should join: to be an agent of change in that Parish. Remember the story of the Trojan Horse? I love to think how much good you could do there. Imagine if you were part of the RCIA team, or better yet, if you were to lead Catholic doctrine discussion groups, inviting good speakers, answering questions, taking care of Catechism classes (for kids, young adults, etc). Possibilities are endless! We need people like you who knows the faith on this side of the Tiber, most definitely! ;)

  • http://www.facebook.com/verkonika Veronica Salazar

    Hi Tina, I either read or heard on a conversation that it is not what we are going to get out of going to Mass, it is what we are bringing to it what’s important. You are bringing yourself, your brokenness, your imperfections to the One that can help you. The Catholic church is not a Museum for Saints, it is a Hospital for all of us sinners! Don’t get too overly sensitive because probably the deacon didn’t have people’s skills, I’m sure it was nothing personal. If you’re Catholic, just give God a chance. He may surprise you beyond your dreams. Go to confession, go to Mass, pray the Rosary. We don’t get fit by going to the gym 30mins and we’re done but by our perseverance and discipline. The same way, the spirit is like a muscle we need to train for silence, prayer and to listen to God’s voice, but if we give up at the first attempt we’re not going to get too far. God bless and hope to see you back to church, girl! :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/verkonika Veronica Salazar

    I know, I agree with you and I understand your position on the richness of our traditional chants and hymns, but ask yourself if it makes sense to cut you out from receiving the Bread of Life over bad music or bad liturgy? I mean, it is GOD himself what we get in the Eucharist! I know it doesn’t make sense to shut your senses, it shouldn’t be this way, but hey! We were not supposed to be thrown out of Eden either. I mean, do you prefer good music over Jesus’ presence? If it were because of good music or good preaching, a lot of our Protestant brethren would not be considering crossing the Tiber. Just think about Jesus waiting for you with open arms next time you go to church ;)

  • Donna G

    I have never skipped Mass, but every single week I want to skip it and dread going. It’s a disheartening ordeal. Awful, inappropriate and intrusive music, lack of reverence, and a parish priest who sits out Holy Communion while it is distributed by an army of “extraordinary” ministers. Well I suppose he does get up every now and then to bless a child. Sometimes I feel as if I’ve wandered into the wrong church.

    I’m treating it as a penance but I do it with bad feeling. Surely it shouldn’t be like this.

  • http://madamescherzo.tumblr.com/ Mme Scherzo

    I’m a new convert. I’m overwhelmed by the number of holy days of obligatory attendance. I’m also the only Catholic in my family now. I love Sunday, because I do a fast from the previous night’s dinner, and I feel the keenest hunger, not for food, but for the Eucharist. As for babies crying in the pews, I love the sound of children in the pews. As a Protestant, our church’s nursery was way down the hall, far from anyone’s ability to hear all the crying babies. But seeing whole families in the pews makes me wish mine were with me.
    I miss Mass only because I have convinced myself that it isn’t really a sin. I need to be disabused of that notion.

  • KyPerson

    I miss Mass if I am ill. I did walk out of a particularly terrible Good Friday service (led by laity, the priest sat in the pews), but otherwise I don’t miss Mass.

  • Nan

    RCIA is a great place to get answers. In my parish, the sponsors go through it with the candidates, get to know them well and teach them about Catholicism. That might help you and there’s no obligation to become Catholic at the end of the year; I know a guy who wasn’t ready until the next year.

  • Nan

    Two things to remember; Mass is your home where you are surrounded by the Communion of Saints; Mother Teresa went for decades without feeling the love but acted out of love herself, despite that. People have varying degrees of catechesis and understanding of what Mass is. If they realized that not only is Mass a representation of Calvary, but that everyone present there is present at Mass, they might behave differently.


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