Fear and Longing in the Space Between Big and Now

We are the bridge builders. We are clustered here on this fragile planet at this time of transition with the assignment to build the bridge to a new kind of world. We are doing our best to live with compassion and equanimity in the midst of big unsettling changes … and  signs that even bigger changes are coming. The big systems that have held things together for the past century – the world economy, education, government – are wobbling and unstable.  Everyone I know is experiencing strange weather; southern California summers are now humid, Wisconsin regularly experiences destructive “straight line winds” and Toronto just witnessed a record downpour that flooded major freeways. Colored maps on Facebook show the Earth temperatures rising from blue to green to yellow to red.

On any given Tuesday, this might just be a physical discomfort or an inconvenience for me, and I can’t help but be aware of the bigger picture.  At a recent indigenous ceremony, I heard visions of even more dramatic Earth changes on the near horizon: rivers changing direction, salty seas invading the Great Lakes, violent volcanic activity and massive earthquakes which reshape continents.

Staring into the face of these kinds of big changes often has the effect of paralyzing me. Partly, I become frozen with fear. I really don’t want the rhythm of my life to change.  I don’t want hard things to happen to me or the people I love.  I fear the loss of so much that is familiar and the loss of control. And my paralysis grows more intense because I can’t imagine any action I could possibly take that would bring healing and stability to this world quickly enough – big enough-  to make a difference.

This is where my longing steps in to guide me back to center. Like a compass pointing stubbornly toward true north, longing builds in my heart and pulls me into sacred action. My own visions and dreams rise up to inform and inspire me; the powerful magnetic forces of love and hope help me to remember the bigger truths of who I am and why I am here. I do not have all the answers and I do not need them. I just need to focus on what I can do today to follow the call of my own deep longing. I can rise each day to greet the sun, to thank Creator and to offer myself in service. I can ask Divine Mother “How may I serve you today?” and I can listen deeply for the reply. I can remember that everyone I meet is a Divine and sacred being.  I can trust in the huge matrix of Divine love that encircles this planet. I can join forces with others who share my passions so that my little action is magnified. I long to believe and I believe in the truth of my longing.