Emotional Stages of the Path

The last webinar helped me appreciate the stages from Keep Me In Your Heart Awhile in a different way (see below for a recording of the presentation and conversation).

I developed these stages a few years back after observing myself and Zen students move through what seemed to be quite a similar developmental spiral. The 10 Ox Herding Pictures, Six Realms, Five Ranks, Four Wisdoms, Nine Stages of Calming the Mind, etc., might seem like enough stages for a path beyond stages but none of them seemed to capture the emotional texture of the path. And that’s what I think this perspective offers.

A couple thoughts on stages:

1. We tend to think that what we’re going through is really personal. And it is in a sense but it’s also not personal so reflecting on a stage system can help depersonalize our dramas a bit and provide some pointers as to what we can do to get unstuck and move on. That’s the dharma two-step. Know and appreciate where you are (which is generally sufficient) and, when appropriate, apply an antidote.

2. Talk of stages tends to unearth disparagement and/or grandiosity. Imho, when such things arise, rather than rejecting that which stimulated, at the moment that we’re dharma students we give a hearty, “Bring it on, baby.”

3. Development may be a slope that we divide into steps in order to use language. Therefore, it is best to have a sense of humor.

Okay, let me run through these, beginning with the last stage, Falling Into a Well, then Idealism, Covert Clinging to Hopes for Magical Gain, Very Crabby with Self and Other, Steady Walking, and Fruition.

After we’ve had some fruition in our practice, some calm or insight, there’s a tendency to get stuck in it. At first we might not even notice what’s happening because we’re so enamored with the new territory and spaciousness. Then ego reconstitutes as what was once a taste of freedom and a trap door opens and we’re into a well of deep dewdew.

If this is where you seem to be, then really be there. Can you stand being in a well? Allow yourself to open and sing the great song of life again – from the bottom of the well. Generate some idealism. Chant the Great Vows for All – “Living beings are numberless, I vow to free them all.” Get altruistic. Pray to the buddhas.

When the mysterious pivot turns, you will find yourself in a different country. No problem. Study the texture of the idealistic heart. Know that it isn’t about you.

This is the path of liberation, fella, so when you’re done attending to your idealism and/or it becomes indulging in idealism, study the really fine texture of idealism. It’s there with every thought so it isn’t hard to find. Notice how the covert clinging to gain is clearer and clearer the quieter the mind becomes.

Now you might get crabby. Really crabby. You might want to quit at this point, to pull back and lick your wounds with the neurotic escape pattern of your choosing. But if you are curious about the crabbiness and don’t take it personally, you’ll discover, really discover, that if gaining mind is in every moment of consciousness, then there’s really nothing to escape.

And “ahhh” there really is nothing to worry about either. So just walk steadily. Enjoy the practice and your life just for what it is – a mess in your particularly sweet and tender way.