Clean Eating Challenge: Day Two Recap

It’s not good. Maybe that’s the wrong way to put it. It’s not so much “not good” as it is we had a bit of a meltdown.

I definitely hit my limit on leafy greens and no sweets. While it’s possible that I was just having a little bit of a meltdown all by myself, I definitely got the impression from Sophia that all was not well in the land of Clean Eating.

Yesterday’s recipes are here, and so far, breakfast is my favorite meal of the day. I like sweets, and the breakfasts tend to be sweet. Sweeter, maybe. Not really sweet, like, say, a bowl of Lucky Charms cereal. (OMG! I shouldn’t even be thinking of something like that.)

We ate the breakfast, and we started the lunch. A shaved fennel and kale salad. Chickpeas, quinoa, vinaigrette. I’m just going to say it was strange. And with that, everything went to Hell in a kale basket. And by Hell, I mean we have no air conditioning, two window fans, and little patience for humidity.

We totally ditched the rest of the day’s food plans. I left the house and deliberately went walking in the Lindenwood cemetery. Cemeteries, by far, are the places least likely to feature food products that are not allowed on this challenge.

And I’m starting to see the point of using the word challenge. At first, I thought it was stupid. A game of semantics driven by people’s dislike of the word diet. Something for the new millennium. Hip, even. Now, after a couple of days on this, I’m starting to feel like it was inspired. This is like mockery by food. My refrigerator is tormenting me. “Oh, you thought there would be milk in here. I’m sorry.” I open the drawers and there’s lemons. Every shelf is full of produce.

I just want cookies. And a bagel. With cream cheese. And candy.

But wait. There’s MORE!

We spent the rest of the day eating Outshine bars and mandarin oranges. The oranges are delicious and sweet, and definitely part of the plan, just not for that particular day. I got cocoanut water/pineapple and strawberry/rhubarb Outshine bars because they seemed the least offensive. Sophia was DELIGHTED.

We spent the rest of the evening watching Mad Men. She had been pestering me to watch it, but I had to wait until she came home from college because she’s the one with the Netflix account. We watched the pilot and I.Am.Hooked. I am already in the most blissful state of crush possible with a fictional character.

“Why, Don. It’s sweet of you to say so. I do look really good in black.”