Men, have you ever found yourself feeling frustrated when, after a fight with your wife, she seems to doubt your relationship and commitment? It made perfect sense to you that you stopped talking to her when you were mad. You were worried you might say something stupid and be a total jerk. But the next day, after things have simmered down, she kept saying she was concerned if you still loved her. Totally irrational? Of course, you love her! So why would she think that? And how do you explain that an argument is just an argument?
Well, YOU know you’re committed, but your wife may not, at least subconsciously. I know what you’re thinking: “But she should know I love her! I mean, we’re arguing and I’m upset, but it doesn’t mean I care about her any less!” The problem is: that is what you are thinking. You need to know what she is thinking. (And it’s not the same thing!) Let’s consider a few insights into her thoughts and some tools to provide the assurance and security she needs – before – during – and after the arguments that are part of any intimate relationship.