Why your man checks out and shuts down

Why your man checks out and shuts down September 13, 2018

Recently I wrote This is what inadequacy feels like to your man to pull back the curtain on some deep male emotions – and help women see that seemingly “minor” things can trigger painful feelings in our men.

But the next step of understanding is just as important. So let me ask you a question:

Have you ever seen your husband or boyfriend suddenly shut down in the middle of an emotional discussion, right when you most wish he would engage?  

Has he ever said, ‘Fine, you do it,’ and walked away – leaving you to handle the kids/that decision/that chore on your own?

Or have you ever seen him check out emotionally and even physically for days or months at a time, leaving you bereft, anxious and worried? (And eventually withdrawn, angry, and even bitter yourself?)

There could be many different reasons for those reactions, but let’s look at the most likely one – and what to do about it.


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