Gift #3: Forgiveness
Finally, the third gift to better relationships is forgiveness. The world needs kindness and forgiveness now more than ever. I’m pretty sure that with the stress of the holidays, even if you have a great relationship you have probably gotten sideways with someone, snapped at your kids, or huffed at your spouse—or they snapped at you. Ask for forgiveness quickly, and give it quickly too. By choosing to neither be prideful nor hold a grudge, we not only show kindness, we demonstrate to those around us exactly what the apostle Paul was talking about when he said, “be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:32)
Forgiveness and kindness are interrelated. If you need to forgive someone, but find it difficult, showing intentional kindness, like giving of your time and sacrificing comfort, can help you begin. A dear friend of mine has a three-word mantra that sums up these simple steps. “Obedience precedes emotion.” You may not feel like forgiving (or asking for forgiveness), but as you do simple acts of kindness for the other person, your feelings will begin to align with your actions.
And here’s the awesome truth: ultimately, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You don’t want to be bound up with grudges at this time of year. Forgiveness will bring freedom from bitterness and expand your empathy and compassion for others. It allows your heart to love more easily.
A big pile of packages under the tree might make for a great Instagram photo, but after the initial excitement fades, the presents will be forgotten. The gifts of time, sacrifice of comfort, and forgiveness will have a positive impact on your relationships that will remain long after the last Christmas cookie has been eaten and the decorations have been put away for another year.
Are you currently reading Shaunti’s latest devotional, Find Joy? Please leave a book review on Amazon!
And check out her latest book (co-authored with her husband, Jeff), Thriving in Love and Money. Because you need a better relationship, not just a better budget.
Visit www.shaunti.com for more.