One of the arguments you hear repeatedly in discussions about the #MeToo movement and also in discussions about the morality of same sex sexual activity runs as follows— ‘behavior involving two consenting adults is not abusive or immoral’ as opposed to manipulative or coercive behavior by one party on another, whether it’s someone in power position in a company who manipulates an employee to do his or her bidding because they fear if they refuse, they are in danger of losing their job, or ruining their career etc. or whether it is an adult manipulating a child or teen to do their bidding.
In this post I want to dispute the fundamental notion that consent between two adults makes something moral or at least o.k. For example, let’s suppose two adults one or both of whom are married to someone other than the two persons in question, consent to have sexual intercourse or more broadly sexual behavior with each other. Does the fact that abuse and coercion are not involved and that the parties readily agree to do whatever it is they do, make this ethical or moral? The answer is no—- for the married person or persons the activity amounts to adultery, and no amount of rationalization exonerates a person from that judgment. Adultery is adultery even if it involves two consenting adults.
Or let’s take another example. Suppose two consenting adults agree it’s alright to shoot their neighbor because he keeps trying to steal their property kept in the yard or in the garage. Just because they agree together that they should have a right to defend their property, does that make it moral to shoot the perpetrator? From a Christian point of view the answer is no. We are not to do violence to others, rather as Paul says we should be prepared to
suffer wrong, rather than doing it. Premeditated violence, especially if it does serious bodily harm or cause death is a sin, and the fact that two adults agreed together that the action was warranted does not make it so.
Let me be clear that I’m not talking about legal behavior, I’m talking about ethical behavior when it comes to Christians. Whatever the law of the land may say, Christians must abide by the Biblical standards of conduct, even if they are more demanding that the secular law.
In our over-sexualized and violent culture abuse is apt to happen, and coercion by mental, emotional or physical use of pressure or force is simply wrong from a Christian point of view. The fact that two adults agree together to do something in no way makes that act moral or ethical. It is simply MORE immoral when coercion, manipulation, or other sorts of abuse are involved.
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