Back in the Saddle

This is Dh’s last week of paternity leave, and I have decided to ease the transition by pretending, during the day, that he is not actually here. This has meant two days of “real” school work while he does errands or other work around the house in the mornings.

I am doing this trial run because Tex wrote that she needs to be aware of her “ups and downs.” and set herself up for success. I followed her advice and reflected on why I was so afraid of DH going back to work, and what I could do about it. Last February we totally fell apart when he went back to work, kids got sick and by Valentine’s Day baby and I were in the hospital and the grandmother reinforcements had to be called in on an emergency basis.

So far, easing into the reality has been helpful, I have learned that I need to go to bed earlier in order to get up on time, since so far we have not been ready for him to leave until about 8:30, we need to gradually move that up to 7:45. This morning I am at least awake and out of bed before 7, which is a good start. I find this hard when the baby is up during the night, this morning he woke at six for a feeding so I just stayed awake, but if he wakes at 5 it is impossible not to go back to sleep, and then too hard to get up when the alarm rings. Hopefully his sleep patterns will settle in over the next few weeks.

I must admit, however, that I am a bit overwhelmed by the sheer amount of work it takes to keep our household functioning these days, so I am going to have to do a few more things to set myself up for success (or at least survival!). First, ask for help and set up a regular time for my mother in law to come over and give me a hand with kids and laundry, second, stock the freezer with casseroles (my mom helped me do this before the baby was born and we ate them all month, which was a wonderful help), third, learn to let go of certain things — the kitchen counter will not always get cleared before school starts in the morning, but school must start nevertheless, fourth, do not commit to outside activities that will exhaust me, especially because I can’t nurse discreetly and chase a toddler through a lobby at the same time, fifth, do not get distracted by the internet! I am hopeful that we will get it sorted out, but I know that it depends, in large part on my personal discipline. This may mean that you are hearing less from me, I just checked on the blog for the first time in two days and realized that I had missed several posts and comments, but for now I need to focus on first things.

Please pray for my family as we make this transition, our baby moon is coming to an end.