Church Sign Epic Fails, “Communion Lite” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Communion Lite” Edition August 17, 2014

I’m so glad there’s a church out there willing to offer me un-transubstantiated communion. The other one just makes me a little gassy.

You want the transubstantiation?? You can't HANDLE the transubstantiation!!! (My best Nicholson, trust me)
You want the transubstantiation?? You can’t HANDLE the transubstantiation!!! (My best Nicholson, trust me)
Just text 777-777-7773. What? the all-sevens one was already taken by that schmuck Drew Carey.
Just text 777-777-7773. What? the all-sevens one was already taken by that schmuck Drew Carey.
I'll spare you the obvious redundancy joke here, but honestly, if folks are uncomfortable about coming to worship, I expect putting clowns in charge will take care of that (crickets).
I’ll spare you the obvious redundancy joke here, but honestly, if folks are uncomfortable about coming to worship, I expect putting clowns in charge will take care of that (crickets).
I'm a fool for punctuation and knowing the difference between contractions and possessives. But that's just me.
I’m a fool for punctuation and knowing the difference between contractions and possessives. But that’s just me.
So basically you can blame Jesus for whatever you did. Guilt by association and what-not.
So basically you can blame Jesus for whatever you did. Guilt by association and what-not.
The first-ever baptist church to dabble in Buddhism.
The first-ever baptist church to dabble in Buddhism.
Swing and a miss, folks. Nothing but air.
Swing and a miss, folks. Nothing but air.

 

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