Meme Confession

An Internet group I belong to is tagging each other with an “I confess” meme. I have absolutely no time to be wasting on such absurd things, which is why I wrote it in my car in traffic yesterday. Here it is for all you folks coming here from ABC Nightly News. (Sheesh…talk about blowing first impressions…)

I confess…

I confess I am so sick of being asked about Christians in Hollywood that whenever I hear myself answering questions about it, I start to fantasize about inserting “Twas Brillig and the Slithy Toad” lines in every other sentence.

I confess I come home Monday nights from teaching RCIA to entertainment industry converts and then watch Vegas on NBC.

I confess that I never really know what I think about anything until I hear myself saying it.

I confess, I too have never read The Lord of the Rings trilogy.

I confess I would probably skip out of work, lie about it and backstab a few very dear friends to get one more of the Bavarian postage stamps I don’t already have in my collection.

I confess that far too often when I slide into the pews and onto the kneelers Sunday mornings, I am so distracted that I am halfway through “Grace” before I realize what I am saying.

I confess I have still not seen a complete screening of anything by Tarentino – including Pulp Fiction – which, if ever discovered by many of my Gen X male students – would establish me as absolutely irrelevant and to be shunned.

I confess I am disturbingly similar to Kolya, a minor character in The Brothers Karamazov who comes in about page 510, and that I find Alyosha tedious and a little stupid.

I confess that as a child I took piano lessons for six arduous years, and the main skill I came away with was how to disguise the fact that I never learned how to read the left-hand signature.

I confess I know every word to every song on Seals & Crofts “Summer Breeze” album, including the ultra weird satiric “Yellow Dirt Down in My Soul.”

I confess that I am completely distracted by babies and cats, and that any conversation I have with adults when babies and cats are present might as well not even happen.

I confess that I am so near-sighted, that I have squeezed hair gel on my toothbrush and gargaled with body splash.

I confess, I had more of an emotional rush when I met Carl Yazstremski, then when I met John Paul II.

(I confess I want to be disgusted about that last….but I just can’t.)

And I hereby meme Patrick “Seize the Dei“, Karen “Some Have Hats“, Alice “The Fairfax“, Jan “The Maven“, and Amy of “The Book“