We meet, we connect, we laugh, and it’s like a high. We push and pull then disagree. We fight, we cry, we disconnect…are we breaking up? Love to Hate and Hate to Love Being in a relationship is extraordinarily insufferable and at the same time, a most-pleasing phenomenon. Every relationship has such potentiality as this: to make us love and loathe a person at the same time. Our spouses, our children, our siblings, parents, friends, co-workers, co-authors; you name it,... Read more
Hatred Cannot Survive Connection If I were to admit to knowing anything, it would be this: connection is the only way to thrive. I also know that I wouldn’t be the only one to remark on such a practical phenomenon. Connection is the only way one can love the enemy. Befriending the racist is how we love the enemy. It’s essentially the way we treat racism, as though it were a disease and not just a dysfunctional personality trait. Disconnection... Read more
The Program The programming of the patriarchy requires technical support. The keywords and search fields have been compromised by this divide of the sexes (genders). Femininity and masculinity are the definitive terms that give credence and justification for division of the sexes (and genders). Venus and Mars have been locked in the ultimate show-down; revolving the Universe in a tension of she and he, female and male, feminine and masculine, vagina and penis. At least that’s what most of... Read more
A box is still a box even with glitter on it- even if you string LED lights all around it; it’s still a box. I’ve noticed a lot of people decorating their boxes, lately. Ones who claim to have climbed out of the box- those who have deconstructed- some time earlier. There are those who climb out of a medium parcel-sized box, and trade it in for a refrigerator box. Then, there are others who opt for a smaller box... Read more
As far as generalizations go; the generalization that people have baggage is a safe estimation to present. Most of us know what it means when another informs us “I got this baggage with me”, or say “I come with baggage”. I am referring to emotional baggage– the scars from the past that we carry into the present, either consciously or unconsciously. An Unmet Need Transforms into Emotional Baggage In his book Say What You Mean, Nonviolent Communication trainer Oren Jay... Read more
Division cannot lead to peace, or so we have been told. Had I not spent the last 3 days breaking down a few verses from the Gospel of Luke, I would agree with such a statement. But now, I am not so sure… What was this fire Jesus spoke of? Why did Jesus not bring peace even though we call him “the Prince of Peace”? Why would Jesus bring division? I Bring Fire Earlier this week, I was... Read more
The fine line that we toe between “feelin’ myself” and having a big ego hinges on a paradoxical paradigm- one that requires a proper tension between the ego and the authentic Self. When we step over the line of a healthy tension, snapping ensues- and I don’t just mean metaphorically. Not only is the strain enough to compromise the breaking weight; but stepping over the line can transform self-love into self-worship. The Ego Rides the Id Sigmund Freud’s... Read more
#MyWhitePrivilege was trending on Twitter over this past weekend. People love their hashtags. Especially if that means we can virtue signal and shed our white tears. Such a hashtag trend misses the entire point, and from my point of view, only grants more space to whiteness. Doesn’t this kind of miss the whole damn point of recognizing white privilege? Awareness (for me) means that you don’t continue to contribute to whiteness, willingly. Also, a hashtag really doesn’t do anything to... Read more
Cardi B and Consistency This week’s information-overload outrage focused on Cardi B. According to her own confession she had a habit of drugging and robbing men. After making this announcement, she follows up with the statement: “Nothing was motherf*cking handed to me.” Well, no, Cardi B, you had to take it- like you said. And sometimes, we are all put in a position to take things when we know deep down we shouldn’t. As much as... Read more
Mindfulness Through Breathing In order to mean what you say through mindfulness, we must first understand what mindfulness is. Mindfulness is an intentional action that liberates an individual. Primarily, mindfulness is defined as an awareness that is free from distortion or bias. It’s a neutral space in the present moment. It’s as easy to find as focusing in on your breathing: listening for the drawing in and out, really being attuned to what your breath feels like to inhale and... Read more
Danielle Kingstrom
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